Plan

Beginning

Set the Scene: Holiday of a life time, Southern India

Ancient temple ruins

Hot/Dry and Dusty

Middle

End of Day Pool

Tsunami strikes

Flotation devices

How felt while drifting in the water

End

Rescue

Donation

TSUNAMI

This was going to be a trip of a life time, my first visit to India , as a Christmas holiday. As it was it became a trip of a life time for a very different and ominous reason.

Southern India is scorching hot and extremely dusty. They call it the ‘ garden of India ’, but at the time we were visiting it I think my father was right in calling it the ‘dust bowl of India ’.

On that fateful day, I had spent the (whole day) my time sightseeing with my father, exploring around a 5,000 year old temple ruin. The intense heat and plumes of dust was getting to us, so we decided to head back to the hotel.

The cool air-conditioned hotel lobby with its polished marble floors could not have been more welcoming.

“Hey Kush , you wanna go to the swimming pool?”, my dad asked quizzically, one eyebrow raised, as he collected the room keys from the concierge. I definitely did not need a second invitation. In a flash I had got to my room, got changed, and was waiting in the lobby for dad all set for a swim. Dad caught up with me moments later and we made our way through to the pool at the back of the hotel overlooking the Bay of Bengal .

The huge pool was oversubscribed. Hundreds of tourists were crowded around the turquoise water like bees around a hive. Out of the corner of my eye I spotted a smaller pool at the side of the hotel, completely empty! I nudged my dad and beckoned him to follow me.

As we inched closer to the pool it became apparent that this was a toddlers pool, depth 0.4 meters.

“Doh!” I exclaimed in my best Homer Simpson impression. Dad just rolled his eyes, sweat careering down his face.

“You could not drown an ant in this!” observed dad.

“We need more water,” I declared, as if I was having an Archimedes Eureka moment. Those words could not have been more badly timed, for just then, a thunderous sound shock the ground beneath us and as we turned, a wave of water, four stories high, engulfed us both. I remember shouting, “Not that much water!” but I don’t think anyone heard me. Dad had the foresight to grab two plastic cushions from a nearby deck chair. At that precise instant, the wave struck.

Before we knew it, hundreds of us were swept out to the sea, bobbing up and down. My dad tugged my hand and said use this. He pushed one of the plastic cushions underneath me and it acted like a floatation device.

Hours went by (and with each passing wave) we drifted further and further out to sea, and further and further apart with each passing wave- moved. Soon, I could barely see land or any of the other tourists around me. I was getting really scared as it was getting dark and it seemed that I was miles from the coast and the nearest person. I could no longer see my dad.

Suddenly, there was another rumble, and a powerful light beam appeared overhead. It was a helicopter. I waved frantically, and the helicopter swooped overhead twice, before holding itself stationary overhead-don't need repetition.

A rescuer lowered himself at the end of the line and plucked me out of the sea and pushed me into helicopter. Inside, lots of tired and shivering faces greeted me and then suddenly a familiar mocking voice said,“We need more water”. I turned around and it was my dad. I gave him an enormous hug while he busied himself to cover me with a blanket. Words failed me.

The helicopter landed at Chennai Airport . After a quick medical check and a hot soup, we were released from the hospital. A representative from the British High Commissioner advised us that our hotel was destroyed by the Tsunami and he suggested that we take the special flight laid on to return us to London .

We arrived home to an emotional re-union with friends and family. We all immediately set to raise as much money as possible for those less fortunate than us.

It really turned out to be a trip of a lifetime.

THE END

Again very good, you have a vivid imagination and can put your ideas down well. Just check your work carefully and remember those commas! Try not to use too many ands, it is better to use a full stop and begin a new sentence.

Essay Preparation - Tsunami (Click here for original version)