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PostPosted: Tue Apr 22, 2008 8:50 pm 
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Joined: Tue Apr 22, 2008 8:42 pm
Posts: 3
Location: birmingham
i have read many stories with great interrest, i do sympathies with parents, but, if your child does not gain the desired mark and another child does surley you have to accept this, they produced on the day. i admit i am lucky, my ds got his first choice-with minimal coaching i may add-if he had not i would have accepted the outcome and got on with it. there is only so much you can do.


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 22, 2008 8:53 pm 
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Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2007 10:47 am
Posts: 3310
Location: Warwickshire.
You may have felt differently, had your child had a different outcome.


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 22, 2008 9:01 pm 
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Joined: Thu Mar 06, 2008 7:17 pm
Posts: 24
Location: birmingham
Thats a bit harsh sillygirl.


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 22, 2008 9:05 pm 
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Joined: Sun Mar 16, 2008 5:15 pm
Posts: 253
Location: Birmingham
I have to agree it is rather harsh, particularly when the alternative schools are not really suited to your child's ability and perhaps personality.


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 22, 2008 11:54 pm 
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Joined: Sun Mar 09, 2008 10:46 pm
Posts: 47
Location: birmingham
Why bother to start this chain? It is not helpful and you cannot say what you would be feeling if your child had not got in. I have good friends who were as laid back as you appear before the result. They were devastated by the news that their child would be going to a poorly performing secondary school. Everyone who puts their child in for the exam realises how important a good education is. Unfortunately in Birmingham there is a great difference between the good and bad schools and there are very few of us who have the ability 'take it on the chin' when it comes to our children's future.


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 7:31 am 
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Joined: Fri Sep 15, 2006 8:51 am
Posts: 8113
Is the OP a TROLL I wonder.......


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 9:34 am 
In one sense, silly girl has a valid point. The rules of KE grammar school selection are plain. There are 500+ places up for grabs, and the sole criterion is who performed well enough on the day. There is nothing particularly fair about the system but I can't think how else you'd do it, other than the Vulcan mind probe.

I don't believe, however, she would have been so philosophical if her, child (who got his first choice with minimal coaching, had failed to get a place.

I have had parents tell me they are okay with the outcome either way, only to burst into tears when their child has been awarded a place. Goodness knows how they'd react if they hadn't got a place.

Unless we're in the same situation (no grammar school, no private, rubbish comprehension), we cannot judge how we'd react if we'd had a negative outcome.


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 10:05 am 
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Joined: Fri Jan 25, 2008 8:36 pm
Posts: 247
Location: moseley
I totally agree with fm's post.

The system is unfair, but unless we can get all schools to the same standard there is little else we can do.

I think a bright child will do well wherever they go , with good support from home, as has been proved by some earlier postings.
The stress comes when the allocated school will/may cause huge anxieties because of its environment and social make-up.
If your child isn't streetwise, shy or just likely to get into trouble because of the culture within the school, which deems them "odd" for being bright then it is a worry.
So unless you are in that postion it is difficult to pass any judgement.

I do wish the best for all those going thru such stressful times , but hang in there, your child will surprise you at what they are capable off.

A friend of mine, whose child was devasted at not getting into a KE school last year, now tells her he loves his local comp and is really glad he is there.


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 11:07 am 
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Joined: Tue Apr 22, 2008 8:42 pm
Posts: 3
Location: birmingham
i wasn't trying to be harsh, but we all know the system, it works for KE foundation. yes, the problem is the local comps, this is something we all need to try and change.


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 11:08 am 
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Joined: Sat Mar 01, 2008 9:37 am
Posts: 96
Hi All

I think that we have all asked ourself the question before places are offered 'how am I going to react if my ds/dd hasn't been offered a place' (obviously, this questions follows 'how will my child react').

But it's not very helpful or 'objective' for someone to give their opinion about the 'failure to secure a desired school place' after the event, and especially when they are in such a great position! i think we would of all excepted the post if the writer was a parent whos child had not been successful, and was telling us that she had chosen to accept it !?

I, myself, knew that if my DD hadn't got a place I would be extremely worried about what school she would have to go to! So the writer may also be in the beneficial position of having a good alternative comp, if her child had not passed!?


Part of the reason why parents fight so hard at appeal stages, is that they are given the impression that they have a chance (be it somewhat small). I think that admission structures should publish their reasons for the previous successful appeals (obviously, not giving our personal info) i.e. 2 appeals granted due to proof of underperformance as a consequence of social reasons!?

Anyway to all who are still fighting - don't give up, but please try and be as realistic as possible and remember, intelligent children can thrive anywhere (the girl who showed us round KEFW went to an underperforming comp and went on to gain entry into FW 6th From due to superb GCSE results)

Best of Luck Lottie


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