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We can call it what we want 'qualify/didn't qualify', 'blue/green', etc. but the children will say 'pass/fail' to each other. That's the nature of selective education and one of the arguments against it. We have to accept that these discussions will occur amongst children of this age, even if we believe the benefits outweigh the disadvantages. As a rule children of 10/11 are simply not mature enough to handle it another way.Please don't use the PASS/FAIL words - use 'qualified/ didn't qualify' - standardisation means that the same score /80 might be 121+ one year and not another.
Geoffrey
He passed!
Got my son's result in post this morning and he passed (hurray) was not expecting it until tomorrow so big surprise!
Well done...so pleased for you....
I'll probably won't know when I get home tonight from work we're going to open the envelope then....v. nervous.
As a reward we pre ordered a game he wanted which was due to be released today they've messed up the order and not shipped the order until today they apologised and offered a voucher. However I'm still going to buy him one tonight and return the other one when it arrives...
What a nightmare!!!......
I'll probably won't know when I get home tonight from work we're going to open the envelope then....v. nervous.
As a reward we pre ordered a game he wanted which was due to be released today they've messed up the order and not shipped the order until today they apologised and offered a voucher. However I'm still going to buy him one tonight and return the other one when it arrives...
What a nightmare!!!......
Geoffrey,guest
The language used by adults is important - I teach in a GS so am speaking from some authority here. Adults need to give the lead - we don't want some children thinking they are 'better' than other - they are different, that's all.
I have seen parent stop their children being friends with those on the wrong side of 121 - the barrier is so artificial too! This years '121' may have been 119 0r 123 in another year - there are the same number of GS places but cohorts vary in number ....
The language used by adults is important - I teach in a GS so am speaking from some authority here. Adults need to give the lead - we don't want some children thinking they are 'better' than other - they are different, that's all.
I have seen parent stop their children being friends with those on the wrong side of 121 - the barrier is so artificial too! This years '121' may have been 119 0r 123 in another year - there are the same number of GS places but cohorts vary in number ....
Guest55 I completely agree with you. When my daughter was deemed 'selective' she was so happy however she received a text message from the best friend with two words:
i failed.
Far from feeling inferior or better she just felt absolutely gutted, it really took the shine off her earlier happiness, and to be honest she still feels a bit like that now, a week later.
That said, CONGRATS to all you Bucks folk that made it and to those who didn't you couldn't have done any more, just hug and kiss your little ones and tell them its fine.
i failed.
Far from feeling inferior or better she just felt absolutely gutted, it really took the shine off her earlier happiness, and to be honest she still feels a bit like that now, a week later.
That said, CONGRATS to all you Bucks folk that made it and to those who didn't you couldn't have done any more, just hug and kiss your little ones and tell them its fine.
Guest 55,
I wasn't saying that what we say as adults to the children isn't important. I didn't use 'pass/fail' to any of my own children or other people's. We've had experience of both in our house and it's not easy for the child who doesn't make it when their siblings/friends have.
All I'm saying that we need to be realistic about how the children themselves will feel and how they will talk about it to each other. The biggest argument against selection has always been that it makes many children feel like failures at a young age. We can try to alleviate that to some extent, but we can't ignore it.
Geoffrey
I wasn't saying that what we say as adults to the children isn't important. I didn't use 'pass/fail' to any of my own children or other people's. We've had experience of both in our house and it's not easy for the child who doesn't make it when their siblings/friends have.
All I'm saying that we need to be realistic about how the children themselves will feel and how they will talk about it to each other. The biggest argument against selection has always been that it makes many children feel like failures at a young age. We can try to alleviate that to some extent, but we can't ignore it.
Geoffrey