Just missed out..........

[colmum]

Hi Guys

Have been watching your tales with sadness all summer. I feel for both of you.

I don't know if this helps but my DS is at CRGS and on Friday someone didn't show up. By Monday there was a new boy in his class!! He'd done two days at new school dont know where and his parents went out on saturday and got uniform and he was at CRGS on Monday. He seems to have fitted in fine and all the boys have made sure they bring him up to date with everything.

I'd say if you think a school is right for your DC, unless they are very very shy and likely to be traumatised by move, then put them in the right school for them. I dont thing grammars are necessarily better and if they are well settled somewhere might not move them but the schools must surely make sure they settle in well. They are going to be somewhere for 7 years they have a long time to readjust after a move and although you need to talk to them it might be a hard decision for them to make and they may not have the maturity to make the right choices. Ultimately you are the parent and do know best.

Sorry, hope I havent spoken out of turn with any of this.

[TP123]

I agree with Colmum (was a little shy to admit it first).

As a parent you now the long term benefits and opportunities the alternative schools have and hence yuo are in a better position to make this decision for them.

Just my £0.02.

[fizzwizz123]

hi Colmum and TP123

thanks for your comments - i absolutely agree, which was what i was trying to say in my post too. I think it is a very big thing to make even quite a mature 11 year old make the decision that will affect his life for the next 7 years. At the end of the day they are still young children and as parents, we should do what is best for them, taking into account the emotional upheaval depending on what type of child they are. I am sure Maymum and I will keep you all posted! Only another 2 years and i have my daughter to go through all the same again!

[maymum]

Hi colmum, TP123 and fizzwizz123

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply and I value your comments very much

I think, if my DS were to get offered at WHSB, we would get a large piece of paper and write the pro's and con's for both WHSB and his comp......explain that he will be spending several years at that school and see what his comments are and how he feels about the situation he is facing. Ultimately, we want the best for him and don't want to be bias towards either school as he obviously attends comp which he loves but he did also love WHSB so very much we we visited................I, obviously, would like WHSB as 'in my heart' feel this is the school for him, but, if my DS refuses to go because he cannot leave his comp as he is 'so happy' there, I feel I would have to respect his decision. My DS understands how important both schools are to his future but ultimately, I want him to be settled and happy as well.
What a dilema we face if this does 'happen' after all we have been through in the last 6 months, and my DS does not even know!!!!!

Fizzwizz123 - thinking of you and your DS (does he know how close he is to KEGS??), just think if your DS does get offered KEGS, you will be putting me in the above position......no pressure then XX
the ever optomistic maymum XX

[hearbroken!]

What happened to you all? I have watched and watched and you have been living my misery. I can't even let my husband know I feel this way because our DS is so happy at his new (Comprehensive) school. I feel I have lost something though. All through primary he came top, won prizes, was their big big star and then messed up maths on the day. Maybe we should have appealed but nothing terrible happened to us he just underperformed. Head was sympathetic and offered to write reports but said unless there was death, disease or disaster in mitigation no point in appealing as lots of DCs have wobbles so it's just hard luck.

Did you get your places? My DS ended up 5th on a list, I don't want to say where because all my friends know and it has taken me since March to get the courage up to even go on here.

I'd really like some happy stories so would love to hear that you all got the movement you needed. Only CRGS seemed to have had any activity on here though.

What do I do now? What happens after waiting list? I don't know if DS would even consider moving now and the truth is I want him to go to grammar because it feels right but I'm more devastated than him so who would I be doing it for.

Utterly utterly heartbroken and even now haven't got over it but now feel ashamed and it's like a guilty secret.

[Moonlight]

Hi Hearbroken! I really feel for you. We were very fortunate that our DS got a place at CRGS this year and there's hardly a day go by that I don't realise just how lucky we were. Not all is lost with getting a place at grammar school. In Year 9 CRGS take four extra boys. I am not sure if this is the same for other grammar schools but maybe this is something you might consider for your DS.

Three years ago we were in a terrible situation with regard to our DD going to secondary school. She didn't pass the 11+ and, looking back, it was actually for the best. That kind of learning environment would not have been right for her. However, we didn't get any of our four choices on our form and, to add insult to injury, we were given a school that we hadn't even applied for! We appealed for one school and lost. For us the appeal was an absolute waste of time as I feel the panels' decision had already been made before we even walked through the door! It was extremely time-consuming putting the appeal together and stressful to say the least. We do, however, have a happy ending; DD is at a lovely school and one which is right for her. She is doing really well. I do think that things happen for a reason. At the time I couldn't see it but now I can. This is definitely the right school for her. I do hope that everything works out for you and your DS. It's really nice that he is happy at his new school and I am sure he will do really well.

[moved]

Sorry to hear how you feel, but hoping this will help you feel better.

I tutored a boy from y7 after failing the 11+. He was very able and his mum kept him on the waiting lists, although her husband was against it. When a place came up her son, then 13, did not want to enter initially, but woke up on the day and said that he would take the test. He came top and finally entered GS at the end of y8 and has been very happy.

I realise that y9 is a long way off, but if you think that GS would be best for your son then keep going.

[sohappymum]

Hi Heartbroken

We were in similar situation all summer waiting for news on list and when I thought it wasnt going to happen then we received a call on 20 September offering a place at CRGS.My heart goes out to you as I know how you feel especially when you know its the right place for your son.I would definitely look into Yr9 entries for your son and try again as there is nothing to lose .

Have you checked the list again that he is on as they stay on until the end of this term?

Best of luck to you and your son

Sohappymumxx

[fizzwizz123]

hi everyone
Well, the update for us, is that there is no update! I last rang KEGs about 4 weeks ago, and was told that they had not been given any notice for a boy to leave. I haven't bothered to ring them since - they have my number if they need to call me, so my son is still no. 1.
I wouldn't say i have given up hope, or even resigned to what has happened. I now know that as stressful as it can be at the time, my son absolutely loves his school, is thriving and has made loads of friends. Yes, the journey is not as brilliant as it could be if he was more local, but at the end of the day my son is really happy and thats all that matters to me. I do know of some boys that have struggled settling in at KEGS (I'm sure there are probably some at my son's school too) but i think, philosophically, that someone has to be number on 1 on the list!
I am not sure what happens after 31 December if the list even stays open ?
I wonder hoy maymum's son is getting on at his school ?
But good luck to everyone that is sitting the 11+ in a couple of weeks - i will be there again with my daughter in 2 years!

[Moonlight]

Just wondering how fizzwizz123 and Maymum are getting on. Are you still waiting to hear from KEGS or WHSB? I hope that, whatever your outcomes, your DS's are happy and settled at their new schools.