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PostPosted: Fri Aug 05, 2016 4:17 pm 
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As September gets closer i'm getting very nervous regarding ds starting SHSB. The only reason being that the school seems very musical and sporty which ds is not interested at all. I look at my other son starting our local comp and the club list which we have just received and whats on offer there and wonder if we're making a mistake letting him go to SHSB and whether comp would suit him better for the extra curricula side. Any words of advice or children been in similar situation. He did attend the Olympiad and summer school which he enjoyed so think this is more mothers fear than sons.


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 05, 2016 4:28 pm 
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All you can do is encourage him to have a go. He won't know if he likes them unless he tries things out. Yes, I would always advise that parents try and look at schools where the facilities on offer match their child's interests, but assumedly you chose the school because it matched something about your son?

It is natural to feel nervous. The key, as a parent, is not to let your nerves filter through to your son.


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 05, 2016 5:19 pm 
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We let ds chose the school he preferred. He is very academic and he thought the local comp may have to much messing around in class (going by his junior school and this frustrates him as he just wants to learn and maintain his good grades in the future). The sports he does enjoy SHSB do not show as clubs online, which he presumed they would such as tennis, badminton, dodgeball.
I haven't mentioned to ds my fears, only in general conversation asked if he is still happy with his choice of school which he replied yes. Think I just need to hope all works out well.


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 05, 2016 5:36 pm 
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Location: Essex
Non-sporty and not very musical DS2 (okay, he is a very good swimmer but didn't manage to get a place in the swimming team and if does do violin lessons outside school but has only just passed grade 2) is just about to go into year 9 at SHSB. His equally non-sporty and not very musical (also very good swimmer but forgot to turn up for pre-try-out meeting for team and also had out of school music lessons but never took exams and eventually gave up) was previously there for five years before moving to SHSG for A levels (he is now at university). In terms of sports lessons, the natural level of both is bumbling along somewhere about two-thirds down the year - as long as your DS is seen to be doing his best, it's not a big deal. If he messes around, it probably will be, but that would no doubt apply at any other school.

There are pre-school, lunchtime and after school cross-country / sports sessions but there are not compulsory for anyone who is not a school team aspirant. As for extra-curricular clubs, did reps from the various clubs not try to sign the boys up on induction day? I'd be very surprised if your DS came home with the idea that the only things on offer were sports- (or music-) related. DS2 started off intending to go to Science Society, Chess Club and Film Club, but eventually settled on the first as his main after-school club, later joining the War Games club as well, which has been on Friday afternoons for the past two years. He also helps out at break and lunchtime in the library - plus after school on the days when he doesn't go to a club.

ETA, sorry, possibly I misinterpreted your first post...
I must admit that I don't know whether there are clubs for the games you mention - he should check the list on the board at near the end of the East End corridor. It may be that a new club could be started up, possibly if there was a sixth-former who might be interested in running it, but I'm not sure what the mechanism for this would be. I would suggest emailing the 'enquiries@..' address to enquire.

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 05, 2016 5:49 pm 
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Thank you for the reply. We didn't know they offered swimming as ds is very good at that and something else he'd enjoy. From what I understand they had lists on induction day but they removed the joining lists as children where going mad writing names down and influx for ones such as computer club. I think clubs such as science society etc he just doesn't know enough about as although loves science and this is one of the main subjects he wants to study for future he thinks it sounds boring!! Maybe he can find out more when he starts in September and maybe mum needs to relax and stop worrying so much!


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 05, 2016 5:55 pm 
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It's also a good opportunity to try new things. Often the same sport is very different at secondary school than the way it's 'taught' at primary.
Children get s 'non sporty' tag at school if they don't play football but at secondary there will be lots of different opportunities.

He might come across an instrument he finds interesting or enjoy singing of various kinds.

Or he might shun both for a different kind of activity.

Its great to join something as a way of making friends, especially bits in different years and it's very unlikely he won't find something he fancies. But don't worry about him doing loads of stuff. Year 7 can be exhausting at first so let him find his own level if participation.

It might take him a while to settle but he will. Please don't worry and don't let him pick up on your concerns. Confidence will really help him.


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 05, 2016 6:03 pm 
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DS2 isn't really a War Games lad (and definitely not Warhammer, which I am told can get seriously expensive??!), but initially went along because one of his friends went. He also went to cricket club in year 7 - something that rather surprised us :lol: - and really enjoyed that.

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Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.Groucho Marx


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 19, 2016 7:43 am 
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Hi, my son starts at SHSB in a few weeks but is really afraid. He didn't enjoy induction day and is asking me to send him to a different school with his older brother. I realise it's nerves but wondered if anyone has experience of dealing with a reluctant new starter. Many thanks.


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 19, 2016 7:51 am 
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Have you been given the name of his tutor? I would email him/her and let them know so that they are aware that he is very worried.

The first half a term is tough on all of them - any parent who says it isn't is probably hiding under a rock! If he has wobbles, tell him it is perfectly normal in this new unfamiliar environment and he needs to knuckle down and give it his best shot and you can reassess at half term. He will most likely have settled by then.


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 19, 2016 8:03 am 
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Thanks Kenyancowgirl, it's helpful to know he probably won't be the only one who wishes himself back in year 6. Thanks for the advice :)


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