Page 1 of 3

What would you do different?

Posted: Mon Oct 25, 2010 5:59 pm
by 1203tommy
Hi now I'm back from holiday I can't keep away from this site!!
What I think might be helpful whilst it's still fresh to all of us is saying what worked for us, what we'd do different.
I only learnt a lot of things others did after the test -too late, and I thought I wish I'd done that!
I have DD2 in year 3 and thinking to myself when should I start with her,as DD1 onlystarted in March!
I and others could really gain from others experience, good and bad.
Thanks :D

Re: What would you do different?

Posted: Mon Oct 25, 2010 6:34 pm
by proud mum x2
I have two DC one just started at Uni and one in Y9. Both of them went to/go to Pates. With my son I didn't know anything about Grammar schools and he went into the test with no prep, only the papers the school used to send prior to the big day! He was (i found out afterwards) very lucky indeed to get in.(on the reserve list)

With my DD, I made sure it was a more even playing field.She (not me) made up her mind she wanted to go to the same school as her Bro -so she knew she would have to work for it. So, from Y3 i made sure that i read with her, talked a lot about words and their meanings and did lots of verbal reasoning practise.

Someone I was lucky enough to know worked with her on the sequence type questions, as that was not my "thing"


It was no big deal to her because it wasn't as if i was cramming too much in too quickly.We just treated it as part of her homework. The homework from school was basic and haphazard, usually completed in 3 minutes anyway. She did not suffer at all, she'd tell you that. Also the work she did helped her at school too.

An hour or so a week with my friend and a bit of comprehension thrown in for good measure. This work has stood her in good stead so she has always been used to doing a little work at home and is very organised now with her school work.

Everyone is different, but my DD has always enjoyed working at home, so I suppose I was very lucky.There were no moans, and , thankfully she got her well deserved place.

So, my answer to you would be....you know your children best, so if it's right... start early and avoid stress and cramming, build up to every new section slowly, and don't panic the poor loves. My DD enjoyed her long journey to the test day and said after she felt a little sad it was all over!

Re: What would you do different?

Posted: Mon Oct 25, 2010 6:59 pm
by muminTewkes
Difficult to say as they are all so different and what worked with ds1 I doubt will do with ds2!
I didnt need to push and we just "played"at it all tbh mostly,until the last 6/8 weeks,like pp said-no cramming.
With ds1 the thing i really would do differently was working on the vocab earlier(like 5 years earlier!!!)That is his only area that was "weaker"as he really isnt into reading.This i got round by doing the Tutors Vocab Builder and practising compound words-a good job in light of the heavy bias toward this on this last 11+.
Other than that im happy with how it worked out for him..the others ill start earlier and slower,just in case they are not a "natural"at VR as he seems to be.

Re: What would you do different?

Posted: Mon Oct 25, 2010 7:20 pm
by 1203tommy
muminTewks I completely agree, especially about the vocab. My DD is maths crazy, anything maths she loves, but not as interested in literature, I think this was a disadvantage for her. DD2 loves to read, but I think I will start now with getting all the basics strong -timestables, vocab, spelling.. Then maybe introduce VR next spring, for 'fun'.
Something I didnt do for DD1, not sure why it didn't even cross my mind was practice 2 tests back to back with a break in the middle, to prepare for the day. That's my biggest regret.
:|

Re: What would you do different?

Posted: Mon Oct 25, 2010 11:01 pm
by turtleglos
I agree with everyone it is down to your dcs personality. Ds1 bright,intelligent,picks things up very quickly and extremely conscientious. We started in January as I was aadvised by parents who had just been through it not to leave it until yr 6(that had been my plan :shock: ).
If you want/need a tutor,book early and find one that suits your dc and family in general.
My ds2 is as clever as ds1 however he is missing the conscientious gene so despite wanting to take the test he refuses to apply himself. I will have to be stricter and I am making sure that he gets used to doing 20mins of work every day throughout year 4 with a tutor in yr 5(already booked,shes great,pm me for a name) being the carrot. The stick is not being entered!
Praise your dcs a lot. I dont think we realise quite how stressful they find the whole process if they are serious about it :( (I didnt) and remember that they are only 9/10 throughout the build up. Make everything else as much fun as you can.
Read a lot.
Be proud of them and tell them often that you love them :oops: (I did/do that all the time anyway) :lol:
I will probably think of more later and write them down.
Oh yes,did I say love them and be proud of them...

Re: What would you do different?

Posted: Tue Oct 26, 2010 7:23 am
by muminTewkes
turtleglos-will you really start in year 4 for 20mins?I guess (for me)that would depend on whether it was "heavy"VR or just the ongoing brushing up of vocab/reading/tables etc.
My ds2(dont know about ds3 or 4 yet!)sounds similar to yours,bright-definitely(well...of course he is! :wink: )but possibly lacking,as you say,that conscientious gene ds1 certainly possess.
Ill definitely try building up earlier..but we've a way to go yet-he's 5!.........

Re: What would you do different?

Posted: Tue Oct 26, 2010 11:27 am
by Milla
Believe me, it's far worse second time round. If you have another child of GS potential, that is. Otherwise, I imagine it's a blessed relief. And because by then you know the score you feel you have to do as much as poss to ensure that that potential is realised. So the temptation is to do more than necessay so you can't blame yourself. I'd say that the best thing is reading. Lots of reading. Sure, the techniques must be sharp but there is such a thing as death by paper. Keep it from being a chore.

I always disobeyed the advice just to keep to the 21 types partly because of the unknown factor of the second paper and partly because mine quite enjoyed the puzzle solving element so chucking in new stuff kept it all a bit more interesting. I'm thinking about things like close puzzles here and logic problems.

I'd also always ensured they tried everything themselves first. I'd never just tell them how to do stuff. Pointless. It had to come from them (fed perhaps by the judgement of others that if they had to be helped they weren't worthy of a place).

Re: What would you do different?

Posted: Tue Oct 26, 2010 11:49 am
by turtleglos
turtleglos-will you really start in year 4 for 20mins?I guess (for me)that would depend on whether it was "heavy"VR or just the ongoing brushing up of vocab/reading/tables etc.
Yes, he is in year 4 now and because of several health issues he is behind in several areas. He also hates working at home! The plan is for him to prove to us that he is prepared to work this year(while catching up),next year I will pay for a tutor and then we will enter him for grammar. If he doesnt get used to homework now,I dont think he will do it at grammar school so it will become a waste of a good place :evil: as he would be better off in a comp where they dont have to plan for themselves as much.
He knows this and as he really wants to go to grammar he is putting in some effort.
Its definately not anything heavy,just some books aimed at his age level plus extra work his school send home to make sure he has a good understanding of the basics.
Just getting into good habits I suppose.

Re: What would you do different?

Posted: Tue Oct 26, 2010 12:05 pm
by muminTewkes
Milla wrote:Believe me, it's far worse second time round. If you have another child of GS potential, that is. Otherwise, I imagine it's a blessed relief. And because by then you know the score you feel you have to do as much as poss to ensure that that potential is realised. So the temptation is to do more than necessay so you can't blame yourself. I'd say that the best thing is reading. Lots of reading. Sure, the techniques must be sharp but there is such a thing as death by paper. Keep it from being a chore.

Milla-Id feel Id have to just try to see if the others COULD do it too,it would only seem fair.If they showed no interest then fair enough.But yes,I can see its worse second(or third or fourth!)time around!
Reading IS key-as I said before,shame ds1 wasnt/isnt too into his reading but glad he had the natural gift to pick up things in an instant(me firing compound words, for example,at him on car journeys!lol!) or else I feel he would have struggled.Thankfully the others are far more into their books,even now.

I always disobeyed the advice just to keep to the 21 types partly because of the unknown factor of the second paper and partly because mine quite enjoyed the puzzle solving element so chucking in new stuff kept it all a bit more interesting. I'm thinking about things like close puzzles here and logic problems.

Agreed-thats fun here..odd children that they are-I feel they may have been swapped at birth.

I'd also always ensured they tried everything themselves first. I'd never just tell them how to do stuff. Pointless. It had to come from them (fed perhaps by the judgement of others that if they had to be helped they weren't worthy of a place).
Ah...now ds1 HAD to work it out himself-I simply couldnt help,as I said before-Im a bit thick :) but I do feel the working/struggling through approach initially stands you in good stead.

Re: What would you do different?

Posted: Tue Oct 26, 2010 12:06 pm
by muminTewkes
Apologies..quotes went all wrong!baby attacking the keyboard :oops: