Go to navigation
It is currently Thu Dec 08, 2016 6:12 pm

All times are UTC




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 15 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next
Author Message
PostPosted: Tue Jan 20, 2015 11:26 am 
Offline

Joined: Wed May 07, 2014 7:23 pm
Posts: 167
I hate asking controversial questions but I suspect the answer is that both are better in different ways. DS is off to Tommies in September having just missed the mark for Pates but with hindsight I think he will be very happy at STRS. DD is being told by a TA at school (as DS had been)that she should aim for Pates. Personally I have always told both to do their best, do work they are proud of and we will be proud of them wherever they choose to go. I just thought that with DD in year 4 it would be the right time for me to consider the merits of her options, before I start visitng the schools in summer. DD is creative, but in contrast to DS her strengths lie with maths over English. She is sporty in a girly way, liking gym and dance over football though. Denmark Rd has the added advantage of my two being on the same bus for school. I am rather hoping that their love/hate relationship matures in the next two years :lol: DS would be a bit upset if DD does make Pates. They are sooo competitive!

Anyway, I'd appreciate any feedback and opinions on the pros and cons of both.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Jan 20, 2015 12:00 pm 
Offline

Joined: Mon Aug 01, 2011 10:28 am
Posts: 1775
One thing I would be thinking, apart from logistics, is would your DD be happier at single sex or mixed? Some girls can be unbelievably bitchy, but I've found that boys just sort of get on with it. I would always say that this should be top of the list for priorities.

"Serious" subjects are of course important, but as you have identified, it's also important to match their personalities with the other subjects (sport, etc) as they spend quite a lot of time during their week doing it. A sporty school for me would have been ****; dance would have been great. Don't know much about either of the schools you are looking at so I'm sure others will be along soon.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Jan 20, 2015 12:15 pm 
Offline

Joined: Wed Aug 13, 2008 4:25 pm
Posts: 2610
I would focus on passing the exam at this point and forget individual schools. The only difference as Stressed?moi? points out is SS v co-ed but as you know from your son it boils down to marks. The CEM here is VR focused with only a 30% maths. If it is the same in Gloucs and your DD strengths are not in English then just work on building up her vocab, spelling and understanding this year.

As an aside should T.As really be telling year 4 children to aim for schools that are so highly selective. Personally I would complain as it is hard enough when parents put that sort of pressure on DC let alone school staff :!:


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Jan 20, 2015 1:18 pm 
Offline

Joined: Fri Oct 11, 2013 9:09 pm
Posts: 46
Hi Kismet

Your dd sounds similar to mine in that she likes maths, dance and gym.

My dd is in Year 7 at HSFG and she absolutely loves it. She says all her teachers are 'really nice'.

The girls are in 3 different groups for lessons which means they really mix them up so dd has made a lot of friends in school and on the school bus. I heard at Pates they stay in the same class for the first 2 or 3 years. I think she has also made so many friends because it is single sex.

If dd had got into Pates she would have gone there as we live in Cheltenham, but we are exceedingly happy with HSFG.

Autumn term there was a house drama competition and before Christmas a house dance competition. This term's pe lessons are dance and I think gymnastics next term, so dd very happy about that.

There has been no bitchiness whatsoever so far which you may expect with so many girls.

Ds is taking the test this year and we would be thrilled with Tommies or Pates. But at the end of the day, wherever he passes for will be the right school for him.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Jan 20, 2015 2:40 pm 
Offline

Joined: Mon Mar 15, 2010 3:19 pm
Posts: 159
I am sure your daughter will do well wherever she goes.
But I would chose the school which is easiest to get to.
Much more sensible to have them both in the same city.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Jan 20, 2015 3:40 pm 
Offline

Joined: Mon Oct 03, 2011 1:06 pm
Posts: 434
I've one boy at Tommies and another heading there in September, it's been a absolutely great. I'd love to find a school for my daughter with a similar ethos. Have you considered Ribston too? I've heard great things about the sports and dance. But I do agree I definitely would prefer for my three to be in the same town/city.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Jan 20, 2015 7:04 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sun Sep 22, 2013 6:25 pm
Posts: 144
Location: Cheltenham
I agree with the others. The two most important factors are the co-ed/SS issue and the possibility that the choice may be made for you if she passes for HSFG/Ribston etc but not for Pate's.

Children are individuals. I have a DS who would not have suited all boys at all. He's at Balcarras, and it's the right school for him. My DD, however, liked the idea of all girls and was v keen to try for HSFG, and I think it will be good for her. She'll be off to HSFG next Sept. Logistically it would have been much easier to send her to Balcarras too, and I'm sure she'd have got a great education there. If other things had been equal, I would have been happy sending her there, but I felt she deserved to have me put as much time and effort into choosing the right school for her (in consultation with her) as I had done a few years ago for him. OTOH I didn't share results with Pate's (or take DD to the open evening there) because I felt that if she was going to go to a co-ed school then she could walk with her brother, make the logistics easy for the family, and enjoy the many benefits of living close to school. (No criticism of Pate's intended!)

The only other thing I'd say is that if you and she think Pate's would suit her best, then don't be put off by DS's probable feelings if she gets in. Yes, it will be hard for him, and you will have to help him with that, but I don't think that would be a fair reason for not letting her go there. Life isn't always equal, and sometimes other people, even people close to us, achieve things that we would like to achieve but don't manage.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Jan 20, 2015 9:24 pm 
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 16, 2013 8:56 pm
Posts: 1047
I have a DS at STR and DD will be at HSFG in September. Both are very competitive with each other, she would have been happy at Pates but also Bournside, but her competitive side meant she wanted to be at a similar or better school than her brother. She is now very happy, he on the other hand is not so happy and doesn't want her on the bus with him. He already catches an early bus and will probably continue too and she will just be on a later bus.

The only thing is that remember there will be an increase chance of getting in to Pates from 2016 so your DD will have an improved chance over your DS. The main thing is look at what is best for her. I know DD wasn't impressed with Pates as she loves to sew, has her own sewing machine and makes things constantly, and they don't offer that, whereas HSFG do offer it among other things. She didn't like Ribston because she is not keen on dance and drama. So when you look around, look for the small things as they may be the things that can tip a choice: a preferred club, activity, even transport.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Jan 20, 2015 10:45 pm 
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2011 8:34 pm
Posts: 930
Ha - I have the same thing with my 2 - I thought when DS moved up to secondary...... great they can get the bus together as DD at Ribston and DS at Crypt. That lasted a week and once ds had got the bus sussed he started getting an earlier bus ...and now dd gets an even earlier bus even thought they could both go later. :roll:
It is helpful to have them at the same end of town though as there are times when I do pick ups and drops offs and I can do it without it taking up a great chunk of the day and a lot of driving.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Jan 20, 2015 11:03 pm 
Offline

Joined: Wed May 07, 2014 7:23 pm
Posts: 167
Thanks all. Plenty to ponder over. Ii take it Pates is increasing its PAN as well. I must have missed or forgotten that point. I will, I imagine, take DD to all 3 schools and see how she feels. Unless she has strong views on the matter, I imagine that we will put all 3 down and fate will find her the right place, as with DS. DD came to Bournside and Pates with DS and liked both. I am probably putting too much thought into it for this early stage.

You are rightDC17C, pick ups are something I haven't considered. I'm sure my two will appreciate each other in 20 years time.....hopefully.

Tolstoy, you are right. It is not really appropriate for the TA but I know they mean well and is only trying to motivate to do DCs best. Had it not been for similar comments in DSs year 4 I would not have considered 11+ appropriate for him so I have to be grateful really for having my eyes opened to the possibilities. I'm sure I'd have worked it out eventually but still, it helped at the time


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 15 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

All times are UTC


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
CALL 020 8204 5060
   
Privacy Policy | Refund Policy | Disclaimer | Copyright © 2004 – 2016