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PostPosted: Sat Oct 02, 2010 7:23 pm 
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I'm looking on some advice on where to send my boy/girl twins. They are currently in year 4 at a state primary school and are in separate classes apart from for maths when they are together. Mostly they get on well but, as with many siblings, can have their disagreements! I'm starting to look into secondary schools and we are considering Tiffin (11+ difficult to get into, single sex), Lady Eleanor Holles (girls indie), Hampton (boys indie) or Kingston Grammar (co-ed indie). Does anyone have any experience of sending twins or close-aged siblings to secondary and whether it was a good move to keep them together or separate? Any information about any of these schools would be useful too.


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 02, 2010 8:21 pm 
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I am a twin with an identical twin sister. In out junior school, we were in diffrent classes. In senior school, we were placed in the same class. Over time, this proved to be mistake as teachers could never tell us apart. In retrospect, going to the same school would have fine, had we been put in different classes.

My husband is a non-identical twin. He and his brother went to different schools, which suited their academic abilities.

I don't know anything about the schools you mentioned.


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 03, 2010 11:09 am 
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I also have boy/girl twins. They are in the process of sitting the 11+ and I have deliberated over the same issue as you. My DCs are in the same class at primary school but are very independant of each other.

Their decision was they would prefer to be at the same secondary school but were quite happy to be at separate schools. This fitted in with what I would have guessed. We are therefore applying for 2 co-ed schools and 2 single sex schools on each CAF.

I don't think there is a definitive answer. You have to look at your own children and your family situation ( difficulty of managing different journeys to school etc)

My main headache is the worry that one will pass the test and the other not but you won't have that problem if you're going for indies.

Good luck. There are many joys to having twins but also some problems that you don't forsee when you find out you're having twins :lol:


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 03, 2010 3:48 pm 
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Location: Warwickshire.
It was the worst choice for my twin and I to be together. We were sat alphabetically by surname and I know it affected my learning a.d made it difficult to develop my own identity. We were identical and have deep regrets that we weren't split. We may have settled for same school different classes though.


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 03, 2010 9:28 pm 
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I have non-identical twin brothers. They went to the same senior school but in different years as one passed the entrance exam a year early. Separating them this way meant that they were very independent but it killed their relationship and they barely speak now.

In my opinion you should send them to the same secondary school so you avoid the hassle of dealing with multiple schools. After a few years when sets and options kick in they will probably not have many lessons together anyway. Games are likely to be essentially split on gender lines and with any decent school you can request the option of them being in the same or different forms and houses.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 04, 2010 5:47 am 
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Not quite the same I know, but our DD and DS are very close in age, and a school year apart. We had hoped they would go to the same co-ed secondary school to begin with, but this has only just been achieved ( Y8 + Y9-DD's choice, having been at girl's school), and both are much happier. They are quite different characters (and don't get on all time), but enjoy the mutual support etc.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 04, 2010 9:44 am 
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Thanks for all your responses. We obviously have a lot of thinking to do! I remember enjoying being at the same (all girls) school as my sister who was just the year above me - even though we would rarely see each other during the day. The two single gender indie schools near us share some facilities and have some interaction between them so might be a good compromise but the three schools we are thinking about are all quite highly selective. Need to think about whether to get them tutored together or separately!!


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 04, 2010 4:16 pm 
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Joined: Thu May 17, 2007 12:31 pm
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Location: south
I have non identical triplets. They were at the same infant school and in the same class. There were no problems but at the end of Year 2 when they were moving to Junior School my DS asked to be in a different class to his 2 sisters.I think he just felt the need to feel his own way. This worked well for all three of them. At 11 they moved to a co-ed indie together although they all took exams for single sex schools too. All 3 of them are quite different. We have two who are very sporty and one not so . Two quite bright , the other less so. One very arty and the list goes on! Luckily for us this school caters for all their uniqueness. We made the decision to send them all to the same school since it made so much more sense for us as a family and they were all happy with that. We, also felt very strongly that we wanted them to maintain a closeness which we felt would slowly disappear if they were at different schools. After all they are going to be a long time apart in the future !! The school has a House system so that when the children get to 13 they move in to single sexed Houses although boys and girls are still taught together. They have all developed their own friendships along the way and sometimes see each other in lessons and sometimes don't. The two girls wanted to be in the same House so they do see more of each other than the the boy sees of them. I think if any of the schools you are looking at have a similar House structure, then sending them together can really work well. Luckily,my lot are rarely compared to each other and I think having a boy and a girl helps when it comes to the comparing that so many twins complain of. We involved ours in the decision and I think if that had really wanted to be separated then we would have listened.

Good luck with whatever you decide.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 04, 2010 6:43 pm 
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Thanks for the info, nell. I definitely need to check what would happen with twins at the co-ed indie - how separated they could be.
I'm always in awe of people with triplets! Glad it's going well for your three.


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