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PostPosted: Tue Jun 17, 2014 11:32 am 
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Joined: Wed Nov 02, 2011 9:45 pm
Posts: 118
Hi all

I attended an induction evening last night which was really nice and I feel I've made the right decision with my DD. The only concern I have is there seems to be a lot of cliques already from the prep school. My DD was a bit upset no one spoke to her and said her class has mostly Year 6 prep school girls. I just want her to fit in. Should I raise this? Will she able to blend in? MY DD is from a state comp and not that loud. She explained how the Year 6 prep girls were very confident as they were around friends.

I'm just worried for her.

Any advice?

Thanks


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 17, 2014 11:47 am 
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You will find that there are children who know each other in every school - most schools separate children from same schools, where possible, to try and put everyone on an even footing but this isn't always possible. Remind you daughter that everyone will be feeling nervous, regardless of how they come across - sometimes the loudest people are the most scared! She will find a group of likeminded souls but, it may take longer, as they may be quiet and shy. She needs to work on being approachable to anyone - she may have to bite the bullet and introduce herself to people rather than hoping they will speak to her (even adults can be poor at being inclusive to outsiders so we cannot expect children to be stars at it!) You could mention to her tutor that she is feeling more apprehensive following the induction evening as she felt that everyone in her class knew each other already and hopefully he/she can ensure that your dd is made to feel more welcome. It is not so much about her "fitting in" or "blending in" - she is unique and special and should maintain this - she doesn't need to change herself - she may need to adapt slightly but she is who she is and I am sure she will find girls there who will appreciate her for her.


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 17, 2014 1:42 pm 
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Thanks I've had the chat and hopefully she will settle. I will speak to her form tutor as advised.

Thank you.


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 17, 2014 2:33 pm 
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Joined: Tue Nov 05, 2013 12:42 pm
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Roz12, my advice to you is to help your child to believe in her self and that she do not have to make any one be her friend nor think that she must ' Fitt in '' nor 'blend in '...that is simply changing your personality....pretending....which I think is the wrong thing to do....We are all unique and different...I think you should speak to the school as we were told yesterday...By the way I a bit puzzled that you raise this as a topic....also I've read some of the previous questions that you raised ?? ?? ??


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 17, 2014 4:43 pm 
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Victorypoint-So you were their last nite? Didn't you find it a bit strange there wasn't a Q and A session?

Also I understand we received many points of contact but no email addresses?

Please could you expand on what you meant by my previous posts? If it's the point I chose the full fee paying place over the bursary choice it was my DD's choice-so just want to be for sure she will be happy. I'm not asking her to change but I just want her to have freind and the current year 6's who happen to be in her form let her in.


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 17, 2014 5:03 pm 
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Congratulations to your daughter roz12: I know someone who used to teach there and it is a lovely school.

Another thing to ask the school is whether they have any induction activities to help the girls get to know each other. Many schools have team-building days in September where they go off and work together on raft-building or zip-wires or whatever. It gives them a chance to get to know each other better. With both of my children this really helped at the beginning of year 7.

Remind her to have an open mind about meeting new people, and that everyone will be nervous even if they already know some other girls, but also that friendships change over time as they get to know each other through the year.


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 17, 2014 6:06 pm 
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Thank you Peridot-Yes they will have a few activity days but again I was thinking the year 6s prep girls will stick together!


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 17, 2014 7:01 pm 
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Hopefully the school will put them into groups for the activities so I don't think they'll be able to stick together! I hope she enjoys it. Px


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 17, 2014 10:10 pm 
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Hello Roz12. This is my first posting to the forum. We were also present for the induction evening last night. We found it very informative. My daughter is the only girl attending from her state primary school and is also fairly nervous. However she made 'a new friend' and is looking forward to attending the induction morning. She was also aware that quite a few girls had friendships already established. We are hoping that the school will arrange events to support our girls whilst they settle.


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 18, 2014 7:06 pm 
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Joined: Wed Nov 02, 2011 9:45 pm
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Hi Enders

Well done to you DD for making a friend. My DD has made friends in the workshops she has attended but not in her form at the the induction event, but she did say there wasn't much opportunity.

Hope to meet you one day!

Thanks

Roz


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