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 Post subject: Possible appeal Glos.
PostPosted: Thu Feb 10, 2011 10:47 pm 
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I may be getting ahead of myself here and worrying about nothing so please ignore if Im rambling.
In Gloucestershire we take 1 test and tick which schools you would like to share the results with. We were fortunate that our ds1 passed for all of our grammar schools, however, he was outside of the 120 places which are offered in his first choice school so we have been waiting until the 1st March to find out which school he has been allocated before worrying about an appeal.
Today he came out of his swimming club rather upset,over the last few weeks a couple of the other boys had started to push him around and more have now started to join in. Today one of them held his head under the water while he was finishing a stroke. Although most are going to other schools, one who is a year older than ds1 is at his 2nd choice school. I know I can find another club for swimming but ds1 is now very worried about this school.He was bullied in yr4 and was just regaining his confidence. I feel that I have to be prepared for an appeal now. We do have some extenuating circumstances,but I guess I have been hoping he is offered a place at his 1st choice school.
Help please!

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 11, 2011 12:02 am 
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Location: Berkshire
Sorry, turtleglos, what a shame. It sounds to me like you will have to wait till 1st March to see what school you have been allocated, and then make a decision about whether you want to appeal to your first choice school. I'm sure others with local knowledge will be along to offer more advice, and hope that this bad behaviour is nipped in the bud. Perhaps a chat with the swimming teacher will put an end to it?


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 11, 2011 8:09 am 
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Hi Turtleglos sorry to hear about the trouble at swimming

for your sanity I think you need to treat it as a completely separate issue- forget the whole appeals mullarkey for a while and hit the bullying hard. My DS has been regularly bullied on and off at school from year 3, largely by the same group of boys. I always had a rather softly softly approach to it all as I know that it is hard to tell who "started it" and I think my DS is particularly sensitive at times, I now wish I had been up in arms from day 1 (well day 2 perhaps). By being reasonable with the school and fair-minded with the mums of the bullies, I allowed it to continue, and my DS has of course got more and more sensitive to it over time. The bullies know this, and now they can set him off with very little provocation so that any incident looked at in isolation looks relatively innocuous and teachers rarely do very much. Swimming in particular is a time the kids feel vulnerable, either whilst changing or in the water, and this was a crux point for us too. My advice is to go to see the swimming teacher and explain what has happened and make it clear that is was not just a "lark" but deeply upsetting for your child. I would also speak personally to the parents of the children involved- at this stage reasonably and calmly, noting that whilst you cannot be aware of the full circumstances you do not expect to see a repeat. It is uncomfortable having these conversations, but my feeling was that I would much rather be told if my child was involved and I therefore used that as my opening line. Whilst it did not resolve matter regarding one of the boys (his mum remians in denial) the other 2 were shocked and sympathetic and their DS's were suitably knee-capped.

Good luck with it

RRR


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 11, 2011 1:13 pm 
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I'm very sorry tot hear about the bullying. However, re the school issue, if they take 120 presumably it's a 4 form entry and I'm sure wit ha quiet word you could arrange for him to be in a different class to the other boy.


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 11, 2011 1:48 pm 
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Quote:
I feel that I have to be prepared for an appeal now
Sound advice above, and I hope it doesn't come to an appeal, but - if it does - an appeal panel will want to establish just how serious the problem is, and it will help to have as much evidence as possible (e.g. a log of exactly what happened with exact dates & times, copies of any letters or emails, evidence of any impact on your son).

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 11, 2011 10:35 pm 
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Thank you everyone for your kind words. I have decided to take RRRs advice and deal with one thing at a time. I have looked into another swim club but will not change until after his current club has the chance to make it right(I am also used to the softly softly approach but can get very cross :( ).
I will have my fingers crossed that we get the school we need and will worry about appeal after that time.
I hadn't considered using the bullying at appeal as it was in yr4 and the school has worked on building good friendships since then so it would feel wrong to me to make an issue of it now. I think we have enough extenuating circumstances without this.
Thank you for making me feel better about the whole situation.

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PostPosted: Sat Feb 12, 2011 9:53 pm 
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Turtleglos

we were in exactly your situation this time last year i.e. just outside the top 120. I tried really hard to be relaxed and be happy that we had our local GS in the bag especially as DS did not want to appeal if he failed to get into Pates (we had a very strong case with letters from school and doctors).

My nerve broke a few weeks before Allocation Day and I went into a panic but there really is nothing you can do now except wait and try not to show your DS what you are feeling. I got lots of support on this forum everyone told me it would be okay that we would get Pates and we did. I am sure you will too. But if the worst comes to the worst there will be lots of support here for your appeal too.

Good luck both on Allocation day and with the bullying issue we too have had to deal with it and persistance is definately the key.


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 13, 2011 10:41 am 
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Location: Gloucestershire
ourmaminhavana wrote:
I'm very sorry tot hear about the bullying. However, re the school issue, if they take 120 presumably it's a 4 form entry and I'm sure wit ha quiet word you could arrange for him to be in a different class to the other boy.

I agree - with DD1's school, they were asked to say which children they'd like to be in the same class as.

Her primary that year had (very unusually) 11 girls going to the school, so they split into 3 x 3 & 1 x 2 (4 class intake). Then DD mentioned either one of twins from another school (as had they), so one ended up in her class. And there was a child appealing who got in after the classes had been allocated who DD had also asked to be in. A child from another school had put DD1 down on her list, as she didn't want to be in the same class as another child from her school...

Incidentally, I suspect that this year it will only be 2 or 3 going from that primary, but more shipping up to Cheltenham.

So hopefully, unless the school allocates classes by Surname, you should be able to give some option so they're not in the same class.

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PostPosted: Mon Feb 28, 2011 7:58 pm 
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Thank you all for your replies. They certainly helped me over that particular wobble. We have heard today that ds1 has got his first choice so we do not need to appeal. :D
Once again, thank you for your support.

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