Go to navigation
It is currently Fri Dec 09, 2016 12:05 am

All times are UTC




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 43 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5  Next
Author Message
PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 12:58 pm 
Taking a break from politics but not to cheer myself up.

Just had to get onto DS because he continually loses or forgets something very important or life-saving (asthma medicine) and then tells me he needs it 10 minutes before going to school or he is going to get punished. This time I'm sending him off with his very important homework not done and he got an earful from me and will do from his teacher. I now feel like crap and he is crying. Can some kind person or numpty make me feel better? Tell me I haven't damaged my child for life and that it's right to put my foot down? Please? :cry:


Top
  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 1:03 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2008 8:57 pm
Posts: 151
Location: London
Hi Tipsy - you know you're right really. It's awful when this happens but we have to go for short term pain over long term gain. If he doesnt start to get a grip now on what he needs to take responsibility for it will only get harder, Cruel to be kind etc etc. All awful when you're doing it and he's crying - give him a big hug when you see him but don't beat yourself up about it - its your job as a parent to be like this sometimes!

Take your lovely dog out and sing something cheerful


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 1:04 pm 
Offline

Joined: Thu Dec 18, 2008 10:12 am
Posts: 3758
Location: Berkshire
Here is the numpty view :lol:

I know exactly what you mean, I have two like this and two over obsesively organised. They need to become resopnsible and you need to help them become so. A telling off won't do him any harm, nor will getting into trouble at school for forgetting his homework, these are the ways that help the child to remember, I think


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 1:12 pm 
sigh...it's the fact he's about to go off to school again for 4 days....sigh...


Top
  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 1:15 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Mar 04, 2008 2:28 pm
Posts: 2361
Tipsy needs a big hug more than DS I reckon :cry:

I'm a big softy but I agree that they do need to learn.
The only thing I would add is that if they are going to/ have got in to trouble at school then leave it to school to deal with it rather than letting it cause upset between you and DS. (Not that I always manage it by any means!!)

Youngest DC is pretty bad too. We have a check list for each evening & for Sunday afternoons to avoid last minute panics.
Does DS have a homework diary so you could put up a list of homework on a Friday night & he can tick off as its done so you can keep track easily?

They do need to take repsonsiblity but most need some guidance in how to manage things so making them keep lists etc ( & reminding them to check them) isn't taking away responsiblty just giving them the tools to get it right!

Hope you feel better soon Tipsy - in my experience the DCs get over this sort of thing alot quicker than we do.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 1:22 pm 
Offline

Joined: Thu May 01, 2008 5:27 pm
Posts: 3450
Location: london
T.i.p.s.y wrote:
Tell me I haven't damaged my child for life and that it's right to put my foot down? Please? :cry:


You haven't and your are right. Doesn;t make it feel any better though does it? :cry:

_________________
mad?


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 1:29 pm 
Thanks everyone and a very wise point KB about letting the school deal with it from now on. As for homework diary, he may have one but would he know where he left it? :roll:


Top
  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 1:40 pm 
Offline

Joined: Thu Jan 08, 2009 5:00 pm
Posts: 558
Location: Wales
((((((((((Tipsy))))))))))))

If it's any consolation my DS under similar circumstances tells me, in a rather too commanding tone for a 12 year old, "you're doing my head in, back off"

So it seems we have a choice of either an upset boy or a stroppy boy!

You were right to put your foot down! It does feel awful though doesn't it? When he's a bit older maybe try out the leaving him to it approach and let him feel the consequences (although not with the medication). I've done this a few times with DS and it is having a great effect!

Go and tell Forbes how you're feeling, I'm sure he will be able to cheer you up!

_________________
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 1:42 pm 
Firstly, Forbes and I are not talking! :x

Quote:
If it's any consolation my DS under similar circumstances tells me, in a rather too commanding tone for a 12 year old, "you're doing my head in, back off"


The day he does this to me there will be no guilt! :shock:


Top
  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon May 10, 2010 1:47 pm 
Offline

Joined: Thu Jan 08, 2009 5:00 pm
Posts: 558
Location: Wales
Well we do hug and make up soon after and very occasionally he will tell me thank you for trying to organise him.

Oh dear - what has Forbes done now??? :shock:

_________________
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 43 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5  Next

All times are UTC


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
CALL 020 8204 5060
   
Privacy Policy | Refund Policy | Disclaimer | Copyright © 2004 – 2016