My Moral Dilemma!

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Booklady
Posts: 522
Joined: Mon May 19, 2008 10:39 pm

My Moral Dilemma!

Post by Booklady »

Here it is ....

Happy at my work - currently doing a very interesting overseas secondment (away 2-3 days per week) - this finishes end March. At that point the plan was for me to return to the UK - but they could not specify to which job (my old job had been filled in the meantime). I have been with this co, for over 5 years.

Whilst I was away last year - was headhunted over a period of months, and eventually, after much soul searching, said yes in January to a great job offer (with a hefty payrise) in a new company. Only said yes after talking to current company - who could not promise exactly what they would offer me after I finished my secondment. Due to start new company end April (finish existing co 2nd week April).

But now - a great job - the one I really wanted all along - has come up in existing company - and they want me to have it. But - it still has to be advertised internally - which is all taking time. So they cannot guarantee I have the job until this process has been completed - probably 1st - 2nd week April.

So here's the issue - the new co are sending me stuff (printer, phone, induction programme etc, flights need to be booked as it is an international role, etc etc etc. but I cannot say a word to them - until I have the job I really want in my current co. offered to me! This may be only 1-2 weeks before I start at the new place! At that point I will have to let them down very badly! And I know my name will be mud!!

Have any of you ever done something like this - or had it done to you? What happened? I would be interested to know! And any advice about doing it - best by phone or by letter? I feel in a letter I could explain myself better - which I may not do well on the phone. I feel terrible about the prospect of doing it - it is absolutely not in my nature to let anyone down - which I know I will be doing badly (they have been looking for the right person for this role for about 8-10 months!!) - but I also know I have to do what is right for me - and that is to stay with the company I am with now!!

The whole thing is tearing me up - I cannot think about much else apart from this and my DDs oversubscription appeal!!

Any thoughts welcome - but please be constructive!! :wink:
hermanmunster
Posts: 12818
Joined: Fri Sep 15, 2006 9:51 am
Location: The Seaside

Re: My Moral Dilemma!

Post by hermanmunster »

can you trust your current company? I would be tempted to take the job that exists as opposed to the job that is still being advertised etc
Booklady
Posts: 522
Joined: Mon May 19, 2008 10:39 pm

Re: My Moral Dilemma!

Post by Booklady »

Thanks Herman - but yes I can - its a real job and they are moving as quickly as they are able to with internal HR requirements, and I am 99% likely to get it! The job description is being written around my skills and experience! But - they cannot formally offer it until the process is complete! So - I have to keep the other co hanging on (not that they know they are hanging on at all!). I am not prepared to take that risk - and nor do they want me to!

Morally its just not me though - I don't let people down - but I am gonna have to! So I just wondered if anyone who had been there and done that had any words of wisdom to offer! :?
scarlett
Posts: 3664
Joined: Fri Jul 16, 2010 10:22 am

Re: My Moral Dilemma!

Post by scarlett »

It sounds as if you have really made your mind up and just want reassurance that it's not so terrible to do what you think is right for you. Of course you will feel bad and I would probably ring but only because I feel I can express myself better to a human voice rather then on paper..it may be different for you. Just imagine where you will be this time next year...will you still feel bad ? Probably not.Which job is best all round for you and your family ? The business sounds quite high powered, will it just been seen as less of a let down and more as well, thats business for you ? ( if you know what I mean !) You can't be the first nor will you be the last to do this !

Is there a chance that once this 2nd job is offered internally, someone else may get it ? If they have waited a long time for the right person for this first job then is this job more secure ?


Good luck with it all.............. :)
Booklady
Posts: 522
Joined: Mon May 19, 2008 10:39 pm

Re: My Moral Dilemma!

Post by Booklady »

Thanks Scarlett - yes I guess I have made my mind up - as long as I get the job with my existing co! The only spanner there will be if someone else pops up with all the relevant experience who they think they have to interview - that might extend the process to the point when I am starting the new job (hope not !! :shock: :roll: ).

Its just not a situation I was expecting to be in - though as you say it will have happened before!! They are both massive international businesses!

Its bad in the office though - people keep saying bye bye! And I am useless at lying!! :wink: :wink: And all the contact from the new company just makes my head spin!! :roll:
scarlett
Posts: 3664
Joined: Fri Jul 16, 2010 10:22 am

Re: My Moral Dilemma!

Post by scarlett »

It sounds very stressful ! Still it's your job, your career, your life.....and so important to get it right ! :)
Booklady
Posts: 522
Joined: Mon May 19, 2008 10:39 pm

Re: My Moral Dilemma!

Post by Booklady »

True words! What with this an the whole school thing!!! :roll:

Roll on the summer - then it will all be behind me!!! :)
Uberyummymummy
Posts: 35
Joined: Sat Feb 19, 2011 9:57 pm

Re: My Moral Dilemma!

Post by Uberyummymummy »

This is why our employment laws are an ass.

It's not just the company and the OP being disadvantaged; spare a thought for anyone applying for the job which is being 'engineered' for OP to get.
Booklady
Posts: 522
Joined: Mon May 19, 2008 10:39 pm

Re: My Moral Dilemma!

Post by Booklady »

I know, I know - but I have been on the other end of this too often and been interviewed for a job which they never had any intention of giving to anyone else!! :roll: So I am not going to complain now things are going in my favour am I !! :wink: Jobs are given internally all the time as companies try to hold onto their talent - which is what is happening here! :wink:

Still don't like what I am going to have to do to the other company though - but I can only do one job!! :wink: :)
Waiting_For_Godot
Posts: 1446
Joined: Thu Aug 19, 2010 1:57 pm

Re: My Moral Dilemma!

Post by Waiting_For_Godot »

If you do not take up the job you will be liable for the costs incurred in booked flights and some other costs they may have incurred although the latter is rare.

I would have thought that you would need to sign a contract for your new job very soon and then you will be liable to work the notice period. In that respect I do think it is morally wrong because the company will probably have to put you on gardening leave and they will be paying you for a month (or up to three depending on your contract) for a job that you never did.
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