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PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2011 8:21 pm 
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Joined: Mon Oct 18, 2010 6:55 pm
Posts: 247
Bit of a situation earlier today to ask for advice on - how can I get my DD to be more aware of road safety when she is with friends?

Situation was that DD ran straight over a road with a friend without slowing or looking and my husband saw them. I was distraught when he told me and even resorted to having a headache-inducing scream and shout session + removal of ipod for a week. She is fine on her own but seems to lose all sense when with a friend. How can I drum it into her? Have explained and shown her all about road safety and they have safety sessions at school etc so it's not through lack of awareness, just lack of brain engagement. So worrying with her going off to secondary school in September.


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2011 8:43 pm 
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Joined: Fri Nov 16, 2007 9:49 pm
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Make her read this:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1367523/Girl-12-dies-hit-double-decker-bus.html

This poor girl appeared to be distracted while running to a dance session.


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2011 8:55 pm 
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Joined: Wed Nov 26, 2008 11:06 pm
Posts: 333
Can totally sympathise. My DD also has serious road safety issues. :( She used to be fine - really aware-but over the last few months she has made some major misjudgments when she's been out with us that I've torn strips off her for. I've no idea what she's like when she's out with her friends - I'm trying not to let her walk anywhere at the moment on her own until I'm a bit more confident that she won't get run over.

I have devised a route for her to get to secondary school that uses mostly zebra crossings with only a couple of other smallish roads to cross. Not sure how I will enforce her using this route though - especially if she wants to walk home with friends.

I'm going to do some road safety 'training' with her over the summer holidays but if that doesn't work I may resort to driving her to begin with.

I have explained to my DD that she must use her own judgement and not trust that of her friends (she ran across the road in front of a car to join her friend on the other side of the road on the way to school recently - only a small road though and the car was actually far enough away but it was still a silly thing to do) especially as she has eyesight/spacial awareness issues.

Love to hear what other people have done to deal with this.

tco - you posted while I was writing my monologue - I think your suggestion might be a good one. My DD doesn't seem to understand that you can't afford to make even one mistake.. :(

Pixiequeen


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2011 9:37 pm 
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Location: Buckinghamshire
I blame this on the wretched "Green Cross Code". It is useless!

Without wishing to hark back to my own youth, and rant in the process, the Tufty Club http://www.rospa.com/about/history/tufty.aspx did a far better job.

The rules were so simple: "Look right, look left, look right again. If all's clear, cross."

I must also say that the closer to the school it gets, the more kids there are and the more invincible they seem to feel. I have to either stop (of my own volition) or screech to a halt involuntarily to let them use crossing points near to the school because they assume that they simply have right of way.


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PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2011 7:52 am 
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Joined: Tue Mar 16, 2010 8:12 pm
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Location: Kent
I hate the road safety worry. Actually makes me feel sick when DS3 wants to go out, and he's 12 :shock: DS2 had 2 separate incidents where he was hit by cars at the tender age of 5. The second time his step sister told him it was safe to cross, so he did. Straight in to the path of a 4 x 4!!!! He was exceptionally lucky both times and escaped with bumps and bruises, thankfully!

They do seem to just get distracted but I agree that making them read particularly tragic news reports, as cruel as it sounds, really gets them to think. At the early teenage years they just lose all ability to pay attention :roll:

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PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2011 10:00 am 
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Joined: Tue Jul 21, 2009 9:56 pm
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Scary isn't it. I have been saved by friends as an adult, so crossing with friends can work both ways!!

I am sorry that I have not crossed this bridge yet with mine.

I wonder if you should go on road crossing practice somewhere with loads of traffic, very frequently, so that always stopping becomes an ingrained habit. I think lots of children have not walked or crossed roads that much with parents throughout childhood, so the habits are not there (having said that, I did have loads of practice as a child, but once still needed stopping from jumping in front of a car when with a friend in my early 20s - but I wouldn't have made the mistake on my own). And then send them out on walking errands on their own without the distraction of a friend or sibling so they have to learn to completely rely on their own judgement.

Any chance of repeating the crossing training in the Autumn with the friends that she does the school walk with? I'm sure the other parents will be co-operative!!

Good luck. What you really need is a real near-miss to scare the life out of her, but that cannot be safely organised. :roll:


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PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2011 10:07 am 
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Joined: Tue Jun 02, 2009 9:28 pm
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Recently, a teenager stepped out in front of me, oblivious without looking. The reason for her lack of awareness -headphones. She was so engrossed in her music, plus didn't hear my horn that she wasn't aware of me. Fortunately, I slowed down in time.

What I sometimes do with my ds's is for them to take the lead, and to tell everyone else when it is safe to cross. If they step into the road on a quieter road, I always shout " squashed" or something similar. Obviously on a busier road i would prevent them crossing.


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PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2011 12:13 pm 
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Joined: Tue Jun 02, 2009 9:28 pm
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I remeber reading that teenagers cause more pedestrian accidents than children or elderly.

When looking fotr info to back this up, came accross this link:

www.dft.gov.uk/think/education/secondary/parents/

Hope it helps and all our teenagers stay safe.


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PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2011 12:33 pm 
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Joined: Sat Sep 27, 2008 9:51 pm
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IIRC, 12 is the peak age for accidents.

I'm not looking forward to sending our daughter off to secondary either, she's always been largely oblivious to traffic and is far too firmly convinced of the correctness of her own opinions and decisions to listen to anyone else's ideas on the subject. Her brother once had to pull her out of the way of a car she'd stepped in front of in a French motorway services and she's never forgiven him for it :roll: .

I agree with Ed's mum - now that I've looked at the GCC it really is total cr*p, it's a wonder anyone manages to get across a road at all.

Mike


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PostPosted: Mon Mar 28, 2011 12:49 pm 
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Joined: Fri Jul 16, 2010 9:22 am
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I think most of us would say our children are not particularly switched on when it comes to crossing roads ! I find a biggy with my sons who roam our small village by themselves ( and whom I can watch walking about a mile from the corner of a window..behind a curtain )is that they do look both ways when crossing, it's when a car is coming one way, they wait and then just step out onto the road again not noticing that there may be one coming in the opposite direction! Ds2 ran infront of cars regularly when small and then when you scream stop he would then run back again , this time even nearer to the oncoming car !

I do worry about ds1, but I will have to run through his route with him and show him crossing places, dodgy parked car areas etc as I remember my Mum doing with me.

You do worry when you read articles such as the one about the young girl, but I know although my sons would be shocked , I don't think they will pay it much thought when out and about .....they think they are invincible !
It's one of those growing up problems, isn't t ? You just have to feed them the info and hope they will be ok ( and the majority are ...Thinking back over the last year at work, there haven't actually been many children in who have been run over...a couple who stepped out between parked cars and just sustained bruises/grazes and one who was hit due to someone mounting the kerb ,only one serious and that was a silly teenage boy jumping out infront of cars...so I think the probability of it happening might not actually be that high.) The problem with children is they can't always judge the distance of the oncoming car ...you just need to stress the importance of being cautious !


That's interesting, PH. I've lost count of the amount of times teenagers just step out infront of my car and then saunter across looking at you from under their mop of hair without a care in the world..whilst I rev my engine ferociously !!


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