Bus Bullies

[KS10]

Last year, DS and a group of friends had a minor problem on the school bus with Sixth Formers, I believe. Again, it was something to do with not letting Year 7s sit at the back when there was nowhere else to sit, on a journey lasting around 50 minutes. DS didn't mention it, probably because it didn't bother him - even when people have bullied him, he has never regarded it as bullying, which I have found just as worrying - and I found out only because other parents contacted me. OH's response was, "Six Formers need to have some privileges," or words to that effect. The parents wrote to the Head of Year and it was dealt with immediately with no negative consequences for the Year 7s. Obviously, this was much easier to tackle as they were all at the same school.

Scarlett, I am sending DS to you: he needs to develop a sense of family loyalty as he has been known to stand by and watch his younger sister get bullied just because he was desperate for a game of table tennis.

[mystery]

You see Scarlett, you might disapprove of your husband's army tactics, but the staged fox-poo battles at the family allotment clearly have helped to develop the us-them attitude necessary for strong family loyalty.

My oldest would stand by and watch the younger one be abducted by a stranger if there was something fun to be done once she had gone.

[scarlett]

Oh dear...we sound like a rather feral family.

These days it's all so sneaky.I'm having another flashback now to primary when you'd be quietly skipping in the corner and suddenly hear shouts of " Bundle Bundle !! " and there would be a mad dash to a section of the playground where 2 boys would be fighting amidst a huge circle of chanting children until some crabby teacher would emerge with her sandwiches to disperse the crowd. Or was that just my school.

[daughter]

We have an example of family rallying around - not a bus story but may be able to be used in a similar way if needed. DD2 was in Yr 7 and having some unpleasant behaviour /"low grade" bullying directed at her and was unsurprisingly getting very upset about it. Bullies knew she had a DS in Yr 9 - but she was not seen as intimidating as she too was a quiet /passive child .... so we rallied support! DD1 spread the word about her DS's issues and for 3 days there was a near continous stream of Yr 9's "passing by" DD2's locker and greeting her by name. It became clear to bullies that DD2 had a large army of Yr 9's able to be mobilised if necessary. Needless to say no more problems!

[Just1-2go]

Oh dear...we sound like a rather feral family.

These days it's all so sneaky.I'm having another flashback now to primary when you'd be quietly skipping in the corner and suddenly hear shouts of " Bundle Bundle !! " and there would be a mad dash to a section of the playground where 2 boys would be fighting amidst a huge circle of chanting children until some crabby teacher would emerge with her sandwiches to disperse the crowd. Or was that just my school.

Absolutely not just your school I remember this scenario very well!!

[inmystride]

Update: situation for DS has worsened. Pokey-boy back in fine form, and also felt it necessary to hit DS in the back of the head all the way to school with a plastic bottle. Lovely young Catholic school lady pushed DS across two seats and onto the floor while the bus was moving.
Have now emailed a complaint to said Catholic school, DS's form tutor AND bus company as I am not prepared to wait until DS is seriously injured before action is taken.

[daughter]

So sorry to hear that Immystride - but pleased you have taken action. Absolutely right that you can't let it continue let alone escalate. Best wishes to you and DS.

[mystery]

Good for you. Does DS have phone on which he can photograph the main offenders or would this put him at risk of his phone being stolen?

Was the girl much larger / older than him? Did he tell the driver at the time? Poor lad needs some techniques, but this really shouldn't happen on the bus.

How come he always ends up so near pokey-boy? How annoying. I hope DS is getting cross and angry with them rather than feeling small.

[scarlett]

I'm really sorry to hear it's turned into a more serious situation.How is your son? annoyed or choked up ? You must be all churned up too during the day waiting to find out how the journey has been.

Hopefully it will be all sorted out now you have contacted schools etc. Does Pokey Boy pick on anyone else that your son could team up with ? It's hard to know what to suggest when you can't see what's going on. Keep us updated?

[um]

A similar thing happened to ds1. He was once punched etc by some boys from the local comp while waiting for his bus. They had been taunting him for some weeks prior to this.
I called the Head teacher of the comp, who was very good and invited my ds to come in and see if he could identify the bullies from their photos. But ds said that would be difficult from photos of so many children.
The Deputy came and stood at that bus stop for a while in the mornings, at the time I said ds1 catches his bus, and there was no trouble after that.
I would suggest that your child gets a very good description of the bully and you call the school directly to ask them to take action.