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Just have a read if you are worried about 11+ failure at all

Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2014 4:51 pm
by Looking for help
I seem to recall Tree writing a similar story a couple of years ago,but this is mine in a nutshell. Or rather my son's.

I think it was just before Christmas 2008, when we opened the result of my youngest son's 11 +. I had always thought from the minute he was born, that he was the clever one in the family. He took to all educational activities straight away , could read and write really well, really early and his mathematical skills were very good for his age.

He went to a very good primary school, was challenged and rose to those challenges all the time. He was very well rounded, lots of friends, after school activities etc. I had three children who had already passed the Slough consortium exam and were sailing through their secondary school careers at this time.

It never evened entered my head that he would not pass, but when we opened the envelope, there it was in black and white, disaster.

Although we appealed, we failed that too. It was an awful time for the whole family.

Anyway we had a halfway decent back up plan, but it broke my heart that he couldn't go to the same school as his brother and sisters.

Well to cut a long story short, he is now a very proud student with 9 A*s and 4 As, admittedly 3 were taken last year, but he has far surpassed the achievements of his brother and sisters who had the 'better' education. We keep looking at the bit of paper to try and fine the Bs and the Cs but they just aren't there.

I am not putting this here to boast, it is just the end of a huge journey that started 6 years ago so miserably. And it is well worth remembering for those of you who have children who just didn't cut it in stupid N/VR tests, that it is not the end of the world. His school is ok, but not amazing, so it is down to the individual child to realise their potential.

I would also say that there must be something totally wrong with the Slough consortium exam as well. He took it right after they took maths out. I'd like to know how many of that cohort in Slough today have the same results as my son.

Just glad that bit's all over now, looking forward to the next stage :)

Re: Just have a read if you are worried about 11+ failure at

Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2014 4:54 pm
by Guest55
Well done - that's fantastic! Another story of 'How the 11+ got it wrong' ...

Someone recently said to me that we should think of 'FAIL' as 'first attempt in learning'; what a positive way to think.

Re: Just have a read if you are worried about 11+ failure at

Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2014 5:00 pm
by Looking for help
Thank you G55 - you have often been very kind to listen to me and answer me sensibly. I have appreciated all the advice that I have had on this forum, it has been great for that.

The only downside is I was hoping it would become apparent what to do next from today.

But he could do anything - and keeps changing his bl***y mind all the time.

Re: Just have a read if you are worried about 11+ failure at

Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2014 5:08 pm
by Guest55
You are very welcome and it's great to see such a positive outcome.

I would be cautious about making too many changes just because grades are good - there is usually a reason why certain subject were chosen. You do need to enjoy the subject at A level ...

LFH - try to bear it for a few days - :D

Re: Just have a read if you are worried about 11+ failure at

Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2014 5:11 pm
by MamaBear
Thank you for sharing your experience, its exactly what I needed. DS1 passed his 11 plus last year and ds2 is taking his 11plus this Sept.

I have told him and myself that it doesnt matter one bit if he doesnt pass. Congratulations to your ds on his brilliant results.

Re: Just have a read if you are worried about 11+ failure at

Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2014 5:14 pm
by sherry_d
Fab news LFH, I always knew your son would smash it. :D

Mine is doing her first set of IGCSEs in Jan so we are walking on a tightrope but I know she will be fine and we are all fairly relaxed about it than 11+. Funny enough now that all the drama of 11+ is behind us, I pinch myself regularly why I worried so much about it. There is clearly a better life too beyond the 11+ failure. I come here occasionally and its funny when I read other so obsessed about it like I was at the time that I wish I could say slow down its just 11+.

So proud of your son. Is he staying at his current school for A levels? Keep us posted on how he does, its an encouraging read to those of us whose children where deemed suitable for high school aged 10+, duh!

Re: Just have a read if you are worried about 11+ failure at

Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2014 5:30 pm
by Looking for help
Hi sherry d, your daughter will do equally well I am sure of it. :).
I have to say it drove me almost mad for a number of years. I think after y10 I began to believe I had been right all along. Even though to this set of gcses and he told me a story about how he'd answered a question in history and the teacher had yelled at him which was a bit off, but I agreed with her, he hadn't answered it as it should have been answered. Anyway he got full ums on that paper. I guess he's a bit quirky and sees things a bit differently.
He is staying at school for 6th form, had been considering medicine but now isn't sure , he wants to drop chemistry as the results for the year above in chem were awful, but he did amazingly in his science papers.
Oh well, I am sure up and down the country there are many children just like him. I think the failure at just 10 as you say , sherry, spurred him on but I imagine equally there will be others just like him who have been so affected it has been detrimental, which is a real pity.

Re: Just have a read if you are worried about 11+ failure at

Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2014 7:11 pm
by scary mum
Lovely news, LFH. Well done to your son.

Re: Just have a read if you are worried about 11+ failure at

Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2014 7:18 pm
by tiffinboys
Wonderful news and so uplifting. Congratulations, LFH.

Re: Just have a read if you are worried about 11+ failure at

Posted: Thu Aug 21, 2014 7:42 pm
by dingding
Many congratulations LFH and little LFH. Wonderful news for you both, I'm sure you're DS will do well in whatever he decides to do for the future.

I'm in agreement with you in how obsessive one get in achieving an elusive place at Grammer school ; parents just want what's best for their child.

Your son has worked really hard in school and is now reaping the rewards. :D

DD