Go to navigation
It is currently Thu Dec 08, 2016 6:14 pm

All times are UTC




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 13 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next
Author Message
PostPosted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 3:31 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sat Oct 24, 2009 3:18 pm
Posts: 40
Hi All,

I've found this site and am curious to know whether you think the 11+ were worth the hassle?

We got a tutor for our Year 5 son as he struggled with writing at school, we wanted her to make him confident in his ability and not worry about spelling correctly all the time. The tutor has enabled this to happen quick quickly as the one-to-one approach was exactly what he needed. The tutor has commented on how developed his work/ideas are for a 8 year old and marked his last work as level 4B. And how she thinks we should be thinking of him sitting 11+ or common enterance exams. She has left him a test papers to do for homework. Son currently doing it and enjoying himself, and really eager to please his tutor. (such a suck up!)

As a mum, i want the best for him - but reading some of these posts it sounds incredibly stressful to sit through these exams, not just for the child but the whole family? Is it worth it? I went to the local comp, which looking back was actually a good one in a suburb. We live in North London and our local academy isn't producing great results but cares for its students, and sure most of my sons friends will go there (except the panicked parents who are currently moving away to get near a good secondary). I'm not sure the stress of exams are worth it, i don't want to hold him back but i also don't want to put pressure on him to work when he's still only a little child.

Anyway, i suppose i want you to share your experiences. (Hopefully the less stressed one with the happy ever afters)


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 4:00 pm 
Offline

Joined: Wed Jan 11, 2006 7:10 pm
Posts: 8206
Location: Buckinghamshire
Hi anon e mouse

Please don't be misled by some of the very stressed-out postings on here. A lot of people on here are just "venting" because they have found a huge conspiracy of silence in the real world about the 11+. They find this site and really let it all out, and it can come across as rather extreme.

You also need to know that in some areas of the country, the alternatives to a GS are worse than dreadful, and that obviously gives rise to a lot of anxiety about the outcome of the 11+.

Your son sounds bright, and if you think that he would be capable of meeting the standard of a GS, why not give him the chance? A bright child does not need to be tutored to death to get into a GS. All they need is "familiarisation", which is just getting to know the type of thing that will confront them during the tests.

I sat Common Entrance myself and failed horribly, partly because I took one look at the paper and thought "What on earth am I supposed to do with that?! (All the Prep school girls had been shown what to expect beforehand, of course.)

My DS1 went to a tutor who runs a bit of a hot-house, and it was ghastly - he burned out a few weeks before the test and didn't get through. My DS2 went to a nice, friendly laid-back lady for an hour most weeks in term time for two terms, and I helped him on a few things as well. We were horribly ill-disciplined about doing homework. He probably did about 30 hours work over 7 months. It was all far more relaxed than the first time round, and he was perfectly happy about the tests. And he passed. (I can't say that I wasn't worrying about the result, and hoping he would pass, but that's just in the job description under "General Duties of a Mother"!)

I am a little confused as to how old your son is - you mention Year 5 and 8 years old? If he is Year 3, and 8 years old, forget the 11+ completely until Year 5. Just make sure that he does lots of reading (including out loud to you) and that you keep an eye out for any weak spots or difficulties in English and Maths. You are clearly doing that already though.

Sally-Anne


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 6:21 pm 
Offline

Joined: Thu Sep 24, 2009 11:01 am
Posts: 235
Location: Maidstone
I've just asked my son who passed his 11+ with some familiarisation and he says he didn't feel stressed at all

_________________
"We've got a date with Destiny and it looks like she's ordered the lobster."


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 6:35 pm 
Offline

Joined: Mon Oct 19, 2009 6:43 pm
Posts: 245
Entering into the 11+ testing will ONLY be stressful, if you as a parent make it stressful. Many a kid has come through it - pass or fail - totally unscathed by any stress.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 6:42 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sat Oct 24, 2009 3:18 pm
Posts: 40
Hi Sally-Anne & Masterchief,

Thanks for the responses. Nice to hear that you weren't completely stressed out by the experience.

Sally-Anne, our son is 8years old and in year 4 (typo in my last email). He's young in his year. Think i will take your advice and see what he needs help in and keep him going with what interests him. He does read out loud everyday(mostly to my 18month old whilst i'm cooking their dinner).

Nice to know your son didnt feel stressed about his exams Masterchief.

x


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 6:44 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sat Oct 24, 2009 3:18 pm
Posts: 40
Hey Familyinthevalley,

Like the point you make. Have seen a few parents gearing up for Latymer exams at our school and it really seems like it will be the end of the world if their child doesn't make it.

Hopefully i wont be one of those parents, as it seems they all egg each other on a bit.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 10:04 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Jan 13, 2009 3:06 pm
Posts: 126
Location: Herts
You also need to bear in mind that your son will have his own opinions! I personally didn't want my son to do the exam, and am happy with the local comprehensive (assuming we get in!).

However, lots of his friends, including his best friend, have tutors and are doing the exam. As a result, he wants to give it a go. This has resulted in a lot of late stress for me, as I really left things late, not realising how much preparation people took! However, he seems really relaxed about it. :shock:

Don't underestimate peer pressure, particularly if parents at your school are going on about Latymers. He'll pick up on it being the best school (whether it is or not).


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 10:11 pm 
If you want to give it a go then you should as you will both always wonder "what if?". May be worth stopping the tutor for a bit though to see if he can cope at school without it. If he begins to flounder again then maybe GS isn't for him as he may need long-term tutoring to cope.


Top
  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Oct 25, 2009 10:11 am 
Offline

Joined: Sat Oct 24, 2009 3:18 pm
Posts: 40
Hey Sally -Anne & T.I.P.SY,

Thanks for the comments.

Sally Anne, i have friend who has the same issue with her son, she really likes the local comp and wants to stay part of the community where she lives, but he has asked to sit exams like his friends. She's going to let him do it and see whether he gets in or whether he changes his mind before starting secondary. Fully take on board that it my son should want to do it, so maybe we talk about it next year when he's in year 5.

T.I.P.S.Y, also get what you are saying about the tutor. It may be worth stopping her some time next year too but as he enjoys her and she's not that expensive and only once a week, happy to keep going. And she is helping him in his weakest area - writing. She isnt doing any other subjects with him as he is in the top sets for everything else at school. His writing has been a puzzle for his teachers and it seems like it was because he wanted to be perfect at it and couldn't straight away so didnt want to. This tutor praises everything he does, makes him re-write what he has done wrong and also is focusing on spellings of words he was to use. Brilliant for his confidence.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Oct 25, 2009 11:05 am 
Offline

Joined: Wed Jan 14, 2009 7:25 pm
Posts: 147
Hi anon e mouse love the name. I can see your point about getting stressed about the whole 11+ thing. I home tutored both of mine. They are comparable academically based on CATs and SATs school at their primary school. The first sailed through the exam. The second just missed. However we got in on appeal. (which was stressful for us not her). I honestly believe that had she gone to a tutor it would have helped. At my daughters school the tutored kids definately did better than the non tutored kids in the 11+ test. The appeal was worth all the stress ( for us not her!) as I believe her to be in the right school. She has been put in the top set for maths, a good confidence boost after her problems with 11+ exam.


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 13 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

All times are UTC


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
CALL 020 8204 5060
   
Privacy Policy | Refund Policy | Disclaimer | Copyright © 2004 – 2016