Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?

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rubyhettybetty
Posts: 344
Joined: Wed Jan 20, 2010 2:26 pm
Location: Rochester

Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?

Post by rubyhettybetty »

Maybe it is time for her to get one-to-one tuition rather than group tuition. What does her current tutor say about her VR? Do you feel confident to do VR and/or maths work with her at home in addition to her current tuition? You could start with the Bond books that are a year below her current age to get her confidence up and then move up. Other things that will help with VR is if you/OH read to her every day so that she increases her vocabulary with words she won't necessarily come across in her own reading. Play word games that are fun rather than all work, etc. I am sure that there are lots of good ideas on this website.

I am trying to get a one-to-one tutor that will not conflict with what the group tutor is doing, I don't want to drop the group tutor now as she does offer lots of test practise..DH started this week doing the 9-10 10 minute maths with mixed results, no VR at home yet, we need to get in a routine which is hard with 3 kids and cubs, brownies, swimming etc after school...something we have always done is read them at least one chapter a night, and she is reading to me as many nights as is practical...thanks for your support :)
no_ball

Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?

Post by no_ball »

I think too much is made of all the clubs and activities for a 10 year old, for my DS he did some cricket in the summer, practiced some guitar (1Hr per week if that) and spent the rest of the time walking, playing table tennis with me and some study. This was in year 6. He has not suffered at all from any of this, and for the 60% of the time he watched TV, how is it made, top gear, mythbusters, brainaic etc..He has had 3 scholarship interviews last week form the indies, cant be bad. It's all about horses for courses..
rubyhettybetty
Posts: 344
Joined: Wed Jan 20, 2010 2:26 pm
Location: Rochester

Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?

Post by rubyhettybetty »

sherry_d wrote:Oh Ruby you are on the treadmill again. I sympathise with you. Two years in a row and I can imagine its much harder when your first has passed, just normal we want to give our kids similar sort of opportunities.

Just give her all your support and the rest will be based on fate. However practically you may really want to think about the alternatives too. What will you do if she doesnt pass, is there a slightly better comp she could attend? Honestly having no choice is the worst place you can ever be. So perhaps there is something good you may find out about the other comps???.

Its hard Ruby even with the best intentions and all the work sometimes it just doesnt work but do all you can and have a fall back option that you probably dont like.

I also think even if she goes to a comp you will be on a good platform to help her. Having your eldest a year ahead in a grammar you will have an idea about the pace and expectations which you can pass down too. Dont be dishearted now, keep ploughing on you just never know. The good thing about Medway is that if she struggles in maths, she can still cover up and pass if she does well in the other papers.

Unfortunately I think there is very little good you can take from the comp offerings in our side of Medway, our local just emerging from special measures (good I suppose that it is not STILL in sm), the faith schools not even a decent level, and the as yet unproven academy.
I suppose we have a year before we have to make those decisions...sort of. She is having a mock test at tutor at Easter so that will focus the mind...thanks sherry x
rubyhettybetty
Posts: 344
Joined: Wed Jan 20, 2010 2:26 pm
Location: Rochester

Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?

Post by rubyhettybetty »

Mental maths, I think can be affected by things like tiredness ....

She did score 21 out of 25 on the written maths test, and she has been having horrifically late nights :-*

What is her reading like ? Awful, she struggles :(

Are you comparing her to your other child ? My 2nd son will take the 11 plus in 2012 and sometimes I despair and think he is sen ...other times he amazes me. They are very different, DD2 works a lot harder, DD1 didn't have to :(

My ds1 was still having trouble with the coded vr qu in August so try not to worry ![/quote] Thanks...reassurring :)
rubyhettybetty
Posts: 344
Joined: Wed Jan 20, 2010 2:26 pm
Location: Rochester

Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?

Post by rubyhettybetty »

Thanks to you all - sorry for late reply, they are cracking down on tinternet at work and deffo can't look at indie if I get fired!!!

Lots to take from it, among my other day dreams we get DD2's results and somehow they blow DD1's out of the water hahahahahahaha - I would be so proud if they did, bless her...

Just take each day as it comes and try to fit soem good in without making it a huge deal then face the decisions as and when we have to..

Thanks guys
xx
tiredmum
Posts: 1161
Joined: Sun Nov 01, 2009 2:51 am

Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?

Post by tiredmum »

rubyhettybetty wrote:
tiredmum wrote:just to comfort you further - bad spelling will not lose many marks in the 11 plus - they are after the content - i checked this out as dd2 is a good writer but a bad speller. Get dd to develop some characters she could use in a story, diary, report, situation, she should be able to discribe their looks and personalities well, using lots of good words. She can then take them with her to the 11 plus in her head, keep her company :lol:

I remembered you posted that the other day and sort of suggested it, did your DD actually use them in the test in the end?
dd2 (yr7) is a very good creative writer(bad speller) so i didnt even really look at this area with her in any depth. It was dd1 who is now in yr 11 who developed these characters, she didnt seem to have much imagination with her writing and although an excellent speller couldnt seem to use her good vocab when writing. I still remmeber the characters she created and yes when she did the 11 plus it was a diary entry so she was able to use them. Must say she only got an average mark on the writing but as i have said, thats ok if they pick up marks else where. They just cant afford to be average or below average on all 3 topics.
push-pull-mum
Posts: 737
Joined: Thu Nov 11, 2010 2:52 pm

Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?

Post by push-pull-mum »

I couldn't afford an independent school myself but if OP is paying for private tutoring already (thinking about 2 lots of private tutoring!) then bursaries are possibly the way forward. One of my neices holds a bursary from a minor public school. She excells at creative writing which is not assessed at 11 plus but which gained her a lot of credit in independent school exams.

Must say though, that a year ago I was very anxious about the likelihood of DD (then year 5) ending up at the Comprehensive but, when I realised that it was a very real possibility I just made myself go there, face my fears, ask all the awkward questions, look at the positives and .... yes, I'm still very anxious about March 1st but I know that it's not the end of the world. DD has grown up a lot in the last year and I think she'll cope. Children from Comprehensives gain in emotional maturity much earlier and will be able to mix better with a wider range of people. I went from selective school to Oxbridge, to academic jobs and probably didn't 'grow up' til I was 30 when real life came and bit me hard on the backside.
Looking for help
Posts: 3767
Joined: Thu Dec 18, 2008 11:12 am
Location: Berkshire

Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?

Post by Looking for help »

Dear RHB...we have four children, our first two passed for GS with no problems, our third was like yours....struggled a bit, she counted on her fingers till she sat her GCSE Maths exam last year. We could not believe it when she passed the 11 +, previously she came out crying in primary school when they did those taped practice mental maths tests, not her forte at all. However pass the 11+ she did and is going form strength to strength in her English and other essay based A Level subjects. Our youngest who can do the calculations required to move a rocket thriough space failed to pass. I can give no explanation, other than if it is for your daughter, it will not go past her.....give it a go as we did, you just never know :D
Belinda
Posts: 1167
Joined: Thu Nov 08, 2007 10:57 pm

Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?

Post by Belinda »

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Last edited by Belinda on Thu Nov 01, 2012 11:06 am, edited 1 time in total.
rubyhettybetty
Posts: 344
Joined: Wed Jan 20, 2010 2:26 pm
Location: Rochester

Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?

Post by rubyhettybetty »

Just wanted to say a big thank you to you all, I haven't been around much but your words are all appreciated, thanks!
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