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PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 11:00 pm 
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Joined: Fri May 06, 2011 7:51 am
Posts: 124
Slightly controversial - to use a tutor or not... I know that it's a slightly dirty subject for some. But I am curious to know if forum parents & kids often use a tutor, because whilst I'd like to believe that bright kids will do well regardless, fear / neurosis / lack of money or time may drive many to getting a tutor. Obviously many kids succeed without paid tuition, and kids who get tutored don't necessarily get grammar school places. So do you think tutoring _actually_ makes the difference? Or is learning from parents the more effective route?

I'll 'fess up first - my total lack of 11+ experience and the desire to maintain a good relationship with my kids (we would have all been whip cracking each other, literally, if we'd tried to DIY it) meant that we engaged a tutor for our DDs. Here, the first element of luck, finding a tutor we liked/trusted.

Do I think she made a difference? For us, certainly yes. She gave everyone confidence and a variety of work to stem the boredom. She taught them exam technique and was not too stern with them, didn't put them off from doing the work.

Could we have done what she did for the kids? I refer you to my earlier "we'd kill each other" remark... So I think for us, tuition was invaluable in helping my DDs gain a relatively high pass mark - along with a healthy dose of luck on the day.

In many ways it would be a shame if kids couldn't pass without paid tuition, I know there are lots of DIYers on the board and innumerable factors go towards gaining a school place, not just this one element of the preparation. Add yourself to the tally:

Tutor 1
DIY 0

(Apologies if this rich seam has been mined already, I've tried to search the forum for tutoring discussion threads, but the search engine says it's too common a term to bring me any results!)


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 11:13 pm 
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Joined: Thu Mar 14, 2013 6:30 pm
Posts: 583
Some DIY for types of questions that aren't taught in primary school. Also made sure that once on school, no tutoring would be available, natural ability as it were.


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 30, 2013 11:20 pm 
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Joined: Wed Aug 01, 2007 11:19 am
Posts: 888
TigerMum wrote:
Tutor 1
DIY 2


Dd1 and ds at grammars. Dd3 'passed' last week but probably not with a successful score, so I haven't added her to the tally :)

The kids were home educated before secondary, so it didn't cross any of our minds to get a tutor, we were used to doing stuff together.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 31, 2013 7:40 am 
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Joined: Tue Jul 21, 2009 9:56 pm
Posts: 8228
I think if you can find and afford a great tutor that must be lovely and relaxing. The worst thing must be, however, to pay a tutor and not realise you could do a much better job yourself.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 31, 2013 8:07 am 
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Joined: Wed Sep 18, 2013 7:07 am
Posts: 47
Adding to existing tally ....

Tutor 1
DIY 4


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 31, 2013 8:09 am 
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Joined: Mon May 16, 2011 1:05 pm
Posts: 4024
Location: Reading
DIY. She wouldn't have worked with a tutor anywhere near as well as she worked with me. As meant we could fit in work as and when it suited, around school homework, visits with friends etc.

I can understand why some parents choose tutors though. It's what suits you and your child best.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 31, 2013 9:04 am 
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Joined: Tue Apr 23, 2013 10:20 pm
Posts: 23
DIY.

At times wondered why we took the route, but it did work well.Have to say it helped us to understand our DC s weak areas & strengths , so worked around it.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 31, 2013 10:36 am 
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Joined: Wed Oct 16, 2013 8:56 pm
Posts: 1048
DS was tutored as he was not going to work for us and I do not feel confident teaching VR. Currently there is talk that the exam will change for us for next year which DD will take. Therefore doing some work with her at home as she has said she would prefer for me to tutor her. So I am tutor 1 DIY 1.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 31, 2013 10:44 am 
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Joined: Fri Aug 30, 2013 7:30 am
Posts: 2248
What I'd call 'light tutoring', half hour once a week and half hour homework total. Would recommend if you have a drama queen, who you argue with when helping (i do), and to gain familiarity with new types of questions.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 31, 2013 11:30 am 
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Joined: Sat Dec 03, 2011 3:14 pm
Posts: 625
We had a tutor for English as working with me was a life and death situation. Maths, etc was with his dad as they were fine together although they had their moments too.

The thing for us to admit when to get outside help - before killing each other was be preferable. I have taught several tutor's and teacher's children due to the same problem - too much emotion involved in teaching your own child.


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