How is everyone feeling, it is almost here

[blessedmum]

How is everyone feeling.
Kent tests this saturday and this time next week, Bexley tests will be over.
I am a little anxious, keep saying we wont do any work this week but cant help just going over a few questions.

[dani*]

We are not doing anymore revision but I can not help talking to DD about the test most days, we are however keeping us with our normal busy weekly after school activity schedule.

I guess I'm just desperate to hammer home that she should not worry too much about questions she can not answer but work her way through the paper, answer what she can and make sure that what she can answer is accurate.

I'm worried she will rush through the paper, not read the questions properly and make silly mistakes just to finish within the time allowed.

She went to the Dartford practice last week and came out with a big grin saying that it was easy and that she finished the maths paper with 20 minutes to go. This is really bad news because it means she rushed the paper and I'm really grateful I didn't get to see the result, otherwise I would most probably have been writing this from a padded cell.

Can't wait to have it all over and done with.

Dani

[Ang's mom]

I am going over some bits and pieces in maths and some meanings for the VR paper. Also going over her mistakes in NVR papers. All not on the same day, though.

Oh don't worry Dani, my DD came out saying the same thing, that she finished about 30 minutes into the test. They got Nfer Paper A and as she had already done it once, I guess it wouldn't have been as difficult as a new paper (one she hasnt seen before) would be.

[blessedmum]

Yes Dani,

dont worry. Mine said it was easy too and it was a paper she has done before. saying that she went over some vr yesterday and made some mistakes. She then said, Oh i did not read the questions properly, You can imagine the horro on my face. I had to remind her she needs to read the questions carefully. once the test is done, there can be no "Oh i did not read the questions properly".
Now am worried I will be more worried after the exams not knowing how she's done.

[CatSmile]

Hi

I went through all this with my DS two years ago and that was nerve crunching enough. I'm now doing it all again with my DD and up until yesterday thought we were handling all okay. It should have been easier than with DS because DD is the more academic of the two.
We've done lots of revision and practice papers and DD seemed to be great at VR but less confident in Maths . It wasn't that she couldn't do the questions, just that she was erratic in her performance. Half of the papers she completed in the time and got a good or excellent score but the other half she failed to complete in the time BUT still got almost all the questions she did do right! Well the last two maths papers she did were good ones so I thought she'd finally settled. Then yesterday she did a paper and I was devestated to find it was the worst score she had ever got. She hadn't finished (did less questions than ever) but still got most of the questions right. She later told me she'd got to question 17, looked at the time left and felt so hopeless that she knew she wouldn't finish so what was the point anyway!!!!
I spent thewhole evening trying to explain that she was not hopeless, just nervous and that she was very capable of not only completing a paper, but also doing very well (I pointed out all the papers where she'd done just that!) She just needed to calm down and have a bit of faith in herself. I don't know what happened - maybe there has been some talk amongst friends at school about the 11+ that knocked her confidence.

I'm just not sure what to say or do - should I just forget any more practice and leave it to her? My instinct is to just hug her and say it doesn't matter, but it does matter very much to her. She just doesn't accept it when I tell her this isn't a test of her intelligence, just a way of deciding which kind of school she would be suited to and if it turns out to be non-selective then she could do just as well there. But I know if I take this stance she will say that I don't think she can do it either!

Just have to play it by ear - we've done everything we can and its up to her now - if she really wants this she will do her best. Whatever the result we're still proud of her and love her. Everyone else seems to think she will be fine and have no trouble -its only DD herself who seems to have doubts (and then she makes me worry!)

Thanks for letting me get that off my chest...

[blessedmum]

CatSmile,

We had excatly the same thing at my house yesterday. She did a practice test at school last week and only got the results yesterday and it was really poor. Maths is not her strength and its been a challenging summer to say the least. she seemed to have cracked it last couple of weeks as was getting high scores but yesterday when I saw the results, I almost burst into tears myself but since she was crying I had to give her a big hug and tell her to just do her best on the day. She actually asked to do more pratice at home but I dont think it will be a good idea as if she does not do well, it wont do her confidence any good.
Gave her big cuddles and reassured her. called the school this morning and been told she will get lots of praises and encouragement to boost her confidence. She's sports prefect and has got a game this afternoon so hopefully will take her mind off things and she does enjoy the sense of responsibility.
Ha this time next week, it will be just a waiting game.

[greenwichmum]

Its a personal thing but by this stage last year I did not do any more work with my DD. They will do their best on the day and if you push the practice too hard at this point they will end up too stressed.

Good luck all of you and your DC's, It will all be over soon.

[dani*]

I agree with you Greenwhich Mum,

We stopped a little while ago. DD was working out more complicated maths questions beautifully and then she told me that 4+3=9. She did correct herself when she saw the look on my face but still that was the moment when I decided enough is enough.

Not sure if it was the right thing to do but she seems more relaxed.

Dani

[CatSmile]

Thanks for all the support guys, it made me feel better knowing that others have faced similar things - we didn't do any more work tonight, just chilled out, did a jigsaw and then had a quiet chat.
It seems she had a lot of different worries that just got in the way this close to the event. The hardest one was really that with so many people telling her she shouldn't worry and that she was bond to do really well she felt under pressure not to disappoint us all. It just shows how all that well intentioned adult encouragement can be misinterpreted by a child . Then she felt that as her brother had passed and done extremely well in his first year at Grammar school she HAD to do the same or better or everyone would think she was stupid!! Then lots of the usual minor worries just added up to an overload. Anyway she said she didn't want to practice any more and just get it all over with. She was quite exhausted after getting all that off her chest so an early night was had. Think a quiet weekend is in order once Saturday's Kent test is over.
Thanks again!

[suzieflooz]

Hi

Just wanted to say Catsmile that I am in exactly the same position as you with DS passing both tests with excellent scores two years ago and doing brilliantly in a grammar school. DD sat Kent test this week and is sitting Bexley next and feels she should pass because big bro did. DD's english/ verbal work is exceptionally high her maths is borderline and she came out of the kent maths test very dissapointed. Didn't finish the paper and not at all confident. I dont know whether to practise any more for Bexley this weekend or not. Had a chat this morning and told her she is more than capable but if she doesnt pass she will do really well in whatever school she goes to and we are very proud of her whatever. Cant wait for it to be over and thank god this is my last time !!