11 Plus Exams Forum

There's a heartbreaking article on The News Shopper website regarding the tragic consequences of poor pastoral care at NW, as well as other agencies. It probably explains the reason for The Headteacher's sudden departure. Such a terribly sad event.

Very tragic. I knew there had been this sad episode but the article of course explains much more than most will have known before. None of the pupils I know at the school liked that headteacher and it is good she has gone for everyone concerned. The governing body have put into place extra pastoral care support and they won't be hampered by Mrs Ross either. Not that it explains away this particular event, suicides are sadly not uncommon in schools at all levels, I know of one at my niece's school in Beckenham a few years ago. Not that it is any excuse for the school but someone who has been unwell since they were six means there were very deep seated problems before she joined the school too. Poor girl and her family and friends.

So sad. This tragedy could have been prevented if adequate support was provided by the school at the time. Does anybody know what specific measures have been taken to improve pastoral care (if any)? Has anything been communicated to the parents at the school?

I don’t know what happened exactly but I do not see any reason how the pressure can be so high at GCSE level that it drives anyone to suicide. A GCSE is a low level qualification and if DC find them that stressful than perhaps they are not as bright as one may think. Also whatever the HT was like I don’t think it is fair to point the finger for all that has gone wrong in a school at just one person, even if it was the HT. The HT was appointed by others & ultimately parents are choosing to apply for places in certain schools.

If one of my DC had serious issues would I sent her to school in a highly pressured environment? I don’t think I would. A GCSE qualification does not have extra value because the child went to a super selective. But I fess up to being rather relaxed about my DDs school work in that I don’t expect them to come home with top grades and be the best at everything all the time, just doing their best and still have time to do other things than school stuff and have fun is good enough for me.

I think as parents most of us are doing what we think is right for our DC, very sad for the family and friends…

MerlinFromCamelot wrote:I don’t know what happened exactly but I do not see any reason how the pressure can be so high at GCSE level that it drives anyone to suicide. A GCSE is a low level qualification and if DC find them that stressful than perhaps they are not as bright as one may think. Also whatever the HT was like I don’t think it is fair to point the finger for all that has gone wrong in a school at just one person, even if it was the HT. The HT was appointed by others & ultimately parents are choosing to apply for places in certain schools.

If one of my DC had serious issues would I sent her to school in a highly pressured environment? I don’t think I would. A GCSE qualification does not have extra value because the child went to a super selective. But I fess up to being rather relaxed about my DDs school work in that I don’t expect them to come home with top grades and be the best at everything all the time, just doing their best and still have time to do other things than school stuff and have fun is good enough for me.

I think as parents most of us are doing what we think is right for our DC, very sad for the family and friends…

If this was the same case as that reported in the Times yesterday (and good grief, one would hope the same school hadn't had two such incidents at the same time?), then the girl concerned was still a way off GCSEs. The precipitating factor was said to have been that she had committed a misdemeanour at school and received a punishment not totally untoward in normal circumstances; however there had been some agreement - overridden by the HT - that given her mental state she was not to be subjected to the normal regime of sanctions.

It is possible that the girl's parents (and possibly the child herself) had regarded an all-girls' grammar school as a 'nicer' / less threatening option than other available schools? Is NW generally known to be a particularly pressured environment?

ToadMum wrote: the girl concerned was still a way off GCSEs.

What I meant was I do not see any reason how stress can be so high up to GCSE level. I can appreciate that stress start creeping in at A levels and that stress at Uni level is part of the parcel but not up to GCSE. Especially for those who are supposed to be the bright ones. I think most DC who are in a supporting environment can do well up to GCSE level. Not talking about children who find learning difficult.

GeorgiaG wrote:So sad. This tragedy could have been prevented if adequate support was provided by the school at the time. Does anybody know what specific measures have been taken to improve pastoral care (if any)? Has anything been communicated to the parents at the school?

You would hope so, otherwise not much of an indication of culture change is it?

Is it not the primary responsibility of the parents to ensure the physical and emotional wellbeing of their child? It doesn't seem right to blame the school/HT only. Clearly she was a very unhappy child. Happiness or unhappiness IMO thrives on the support (or lack of) at home.

mumsdarling - Have you read the full details of this case? This was a very unhappy teen who was receiving counselling and support from a mental health team and who the school had marked out as being vulnerable following an earlier suicide attempt. The headteacher has been criticised for her decision to ride roughshod over the school's procedures and suspend this child for a minor misdemeanour despite this background.
This child came from a loving, supportive home. the school failed utterly in their duty of care to her - as determined by the coroner. It is not for us to judge how she was parented.

boardfleet - I have been down the road of self harm and what a harrowing journey it was. It was very addictive in some ways but was stopped only because of the unfailing support from my parents. This was many years ago when there wasn't enough awareness or acceptance of mental health issues. They put enormous effort into trying to understand and communicate at my wavelength and eventually helped me pull out of the misery I was creating for myself. We all love our children but I believe (and will always) that the right kind of support from parents is the key.

Having said this, I do agree that the suspension from school must have pushed her over the edge. But why was she not supported effectively enough by family and other services all those years? The bit about the 'blood sisters' makes me wonder if there are more girls in that school who need counselling.