Parents of students starting Y12 in Sept 2016

[Guest55]

. Because she intends to go into psychology and it seems as if universities like Alevel Maths for a psychology degree- is this wise? She did achieve an A* at gcse maths. Could she get away from not having advanced maths?

If they want A level then GCSE A* won't meet that requirement. Is there something else she could drop? Maths is still the old spec so there are many good online resources to support her study.

[DIY Mum]

She's relunctant in dropping anything else.

Tinkers , glad to hear you've recovered enough to lead a normal life. It's very hard going CFS...from being very active to now having to deal with extreme fatigue. Unless you've been through it or know someone who has it, it's not really understood. Thankfully, we have a very good gp.
As for informing the school, well her personal tutor is quite concerned and surprised as her reference from her previous school indicates how busy she was. It seems as if she can have access to the lift to use for getting to lessons on the top floor. Chg also offers a more flexible timetable- students can go home during study periods and there's no pe. She used to do sports leadership so it's a shame there's no pe offered but it's what she needs right now.

[KB]

So sorry to hear about your DD
It will take months to get a formal diagnosis from an NHS GP because there are guidelines they have to follow - until you have been displaying symptoms for a certain amount of time they can't give a formal diagnosis.
The only tests are to eliminate other things - nothing can confirm the CFS.
If you want to PM me I can pass on what we have learned from recent experience in dealing with it.

Ask for an appointment to go and see a senior member of the management team at the school. It may be your DD will recover quickly but for most people it is months or years - average is 18months before improvement apparently.
It needs to be flagged up with school as a disability so proper provision can be made and come the time Universities can treat her application properly.
If it is CFS the first few weeks are really important to try to stop further deterioration so it's best to behave as if it is rather than wait.

The other immediate thing is to get her a flu jab. CFS doesn't qualify you for a free one but it's recommended by all those 'in the know'.

[Tinkers]

I'd agree about the flu jab. Even now if I get flu it really knocks me sideways. I had it earlier in the year and ended up off sick for a while, then still feeling out of it for longer.
One of our performance review objectives has to be a personal health and safety one. I've put 'get a flu jab this year' down and my boss agreed. Especially since I nearly passed out on him when I was in the early stages of flu.

Be warned though even the flu jab can knock you back a bit. Best done when you know there's nothing important coming up for DD and that she will be able to rest and recover if that happens. However it is still better than getting flu.

[DIY Mum]

Thanks for the advice re: flu jab. Will look into that as she regularly suffers from flu like symptoms.

[Tolstoy]

Knew I shouldn't have read this DS seems to be spending most of his time covering the ' make time for relaxation ' bit of advice they were given.

[silverysea]

Tolstoy, have to say we have that too! what is more a problem with us, is DH is on dd1's case all the time (methinks he sees a certain similarity with a certain young chap a few decades ago), expecting her to cope with a big load of school work, two demanding instruments and a competitive sport with a lot of training and travel time. He ALWAYS manages to walk in just when I have persuaded her to stop, eat a nutritious meal and sit down with me to i.e. watch a little tv- and DH assumes sitting around what she and I have been doing all day! it is really annoying. She does SO MUCH MORE than he or I ever did, ok she has more opportunites, but there has to be some R n R, huh? She isn't even interested in TV, as normal for her generation, she is just humouring me so we do something together.

Last night we watched 45 minutes episode of a series, last time we did that was a week ago-I had literally run and run all day from 6 am to 7 pm no lunch nothing, dd2 was ill again after a full day at school, and dd1 looking very frazzled, starting a headache but still had just done an hour long grade 8 level cello lesson-in he flounced, and started complaining! We ignored him, watched the end and turned it off as planned, went separately about our various chores-apparently he found her asleep over her books at 10.30 pm. But we watched tv-so all she got was moaning from him. Not the most inspiring for her to keep at it!

[Daogroupie]

Is this something to do with the fact you are now paying for her education?

I don't remember you mentioning active involvement before?

Perhaps he will back off when you get some work back showing that she is in fact well on top of it all.

My Y12 is delighted to be spending all her time on subjects she really enjoys. My Y13 is in the throes of UCAS so subjects are taking a back seat at the moment. DG

[silverysea]

i think she is getting to do a lot of things he would have liked to do when her age, but couldn't. She is soooo busy! Boredom was our problem back in the good old days, not too much to choose from.

He wants to impart his wisdom, because youth is wasted on the young, I believe. She is trying hard to adjust to a whole new situation, with all sorts of new things to think about, it's just teething troubles really. He has always facilitated sports, and I did, well, more muddled through, everything else! for better or worse. She is one who always makes the most of new activities (even the nursery commented on it at age 3), tries lots of things, and doesn't want to quit anything. It's hard to resist being carried along!

I dread the UCAS stage, next year for us, another confusing rat's nest on the horizon- are you/dd getting all the info needed, DG? The parents I know just ahead of us at each educational stage always seem to have something they wish they had known beforehand, and now it is too late. but none of us are working in the educational system, nor are products of it.

We have to choose GCSEs soon as well in this house and it feels like we know nothing despite having just done them with elder kid! New grading system seem to be preying on the students' minds.

[silverysea]

Last night she suddenly asked me to help find out about options for uni study in the USA. Reasonable to ask since I am American.

My head hurts....