No idea about university life - please help

[Looking for help]

My son was in catered halls last year that he had to vacate in the Christmas and Easter holidays. He didn't need all that much with him except clothes, but I felt it was good to take and pick him up, because as supermummy says it is a huge thing, them leaving home for the first time both for you the parent and the child.
This year he's in a house with some others, and he has a lot more of his things with him - his guitars and keyboard, music system, tv that sort of thing. Before he started this year he actually drove himself down with a carload, and then came back, and his dad took him back the following week. We picked him up at Christmas and probably will again at Easter, just because we wanted to, and its not too far. He has had occasional trips home which he's paid for himself, actively seeking out the cheapest transport.

Erm, he hasn't got a trunk, we don't think we've seen anyone with a trunk so far, so it might be better to avoid such and go for the suitcases and hold alls.

[KB]

Agree that a trunk isnt a good plan - most places wont have anywhere to store it during the term anyway.
Vast majority of students will be taken up by parents - it is certainly the norm.(As is takingthem to the supermarket to stock up if self-catering)
Depends very much on where DC is staying but many places will require the room to be emptied during vacation & many do not provide storage.
Generally students who can leave belongings on rooms during vacation seem to travel by train.
Seems like the average is to go home once during each term (or meet parents/siblings elsewhere) unless at Oxbridge where they might struggle for time - if DC has trouble settling would recommend you go to visit rather than let them come home.

For 2nd year most students have private accommodation so require most 'stuff' but can leave it all year so seems that parents take them up in September/October & then they go back & forth by train - not always spending the whole vacation at home.

Am sure it has all changed since most of us were at Uni but more parental support is the norm so DCs who are left to manage might feel a bit unloved.

[doodles]

I was in Halls for three years. I seem to remember being taken up in the Autumn and then going backwards and forwards by coach and train during the rest of the year. We did have to clear out for the summer vacation though.

[XCRGSMUM]

I have sons no 1(post grad) & 2 currently at uni and no 3 off to a confirmed place later this year with lots of friends with children at uni right now. Most youngsters are taken to & fro by parental car at the start and the end of the year due to the large amount of stuff most of them need to take.

Many unis guarantee a place in halls of residence first year which allows a slightly more gentle transition to living away from home. My eldest chose catered halls but my second, having seen the food on offer, preferred self catering. Some students take their own car as ours did/will do. After the first term they teamed up with other students coming from the same area and shared the cost of petrol.

Policy on emptying rooms seems to vary but most have the rooms for the whole academic year. Space can be limited so canvas bags or even bin liners are a better option to transport 'stuff' in rather than trunks or hard cases. However, as with all these aspects it varies!

By the 2nd year they will have made friends with a group and move into rented accommodation. Some families with sufficient funds for a deposit buy a property near to the uni, their own child lives there free and the rental income from other students pays the mortgage. As stated earlier 2nd year students often begin to stay away from home over holidays especially if they have part time work in the place where their uni is.

Most universities have a website where you can look at the first year options, halls etc with plenty of photos which can be quite reassuring to see.

[solimum]

Would have to agree that "it depends"

Confession here - I did actually buy DS2 a trunk which he has used as an extra seat. However it has never been by train and would never contain even half the amount of stuff he takes. Having been allocated a room for his first year up two flights of stairs which had to be cleared out for Christmas and Easter (and only one specified size of cardboard packing case could be left in college over the vacations) it is clear that the trunk was not one of my more sensible purchases - it now stays at home in his bedroom!

Shared house accommodation does have great advantages as stuff can be left: however DS2 does prefer being in the centre of things back in college for his 3rd year. He may pay for vac residence to get some work done at Easter which will at least save me another two car trips (usually with very little flexibility over timing). However as he is only an hour away and accessible by train there are possibilities for him to drive one way etc. DS1 was in shared houses for years 2-4 (also around an hour away) and made occasional trips home to borrow the car.

Don't think I am a "helicopter" parent although it is good to be able to drive down for the evening and see DS for a meal/ concert etc when invited! Obviously less practical the further away they go....

Another tip - those IKEA bags (and other large supermarket carriers) are very useful for shoes, linen, clothes, even books/files (the stronger sort) and don't take up a lot of storage space when empty!

[KB]

You do need to check out the web sites for the Universities Dc has applied to/has offers for as the method for allocating accommodation varies - for some, the sooner they firm up & make the application the higher up the 'list' they are placed.

Am sure once you know which Uni you are interested in there will people about on here whcan help.
The other place to look is student room - or get DC to ask friends who are already at Uni (a good use for facebook

At Dcs Uni they used to offer places to 3rd years who wanted to go back into Halls but numbers have got so high this is no longer an option.

[2ddsmum]

I think a trunk would be rather cool, but very reminiscent of the old days. Our eldest is ferryed to and fro at the start & end of each term as she has to vacate her college room & she has SO much stuff. There is the "void" where you can store belongings but most domestic students take everything home & get pretty nifty at packing & unpacking their rooms very quickly. I'm afraid I am an occasional helicopter mum who visits from time to time with some new clothes. This suits us both - she gets fresh laundry & I get a gossip & lunch with my daughter. Luckily she's only an hour away!

[XCRGSMUM]

Something not yet mentioned is the clubs and activities that a student can get involved in whilst at uni! Many societies attend competitions all over the country and lots of parents go too, to support their child and to cheer for the uni team.

You may only get to see them for a half day but it means a lot to them and you get to meet lots of other parents!

[KB]

So encourage them to take up an activity that's good for spectators - not rowing

[XCRGSMUM]

Dancesport is a good one!

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