how to cope with March 1st

panichead · Post by **panichead** » Mon Feb 08, 2010 4:03 pm

Hi, with only three weeks left till D day would really appreciate some advice as to what to expect. I am at the point of not wanting to even look at the email when it finally arrives and I really don't know what to say to DD if she hasn't passed. For me, I just want her to be happy and she is already upset about leaving her beloved primary school and her best friend who is going to the girls catholic school. I have been making a point of saying the local comp is good (as it is) and there will be new opportunties etc just in case she doesnt get her first choice but I just don't know how I will handle the disappointment if she doesnt get in. Would reallly appreciate anyone letting me know from experience as I am slowly getting more and more panicky as the days go by. I just wish they didn't have to grow up !

Thanks in advance-

Chelmsford mum · Post by **Chelmsford mum** » Mon Feb 08, 2010 4:31 pm

When my second one just missed out on getting in initially, I spent a sleepless and teary night worrying about how to tell her.In the end, she was mildly disappointed but generally o.k especially when I said we would be going out for a pizza because she had tried her best.Gran also gave her a me 2 you bear for her efforts.
In retrospect I was more upset than her.My mind was going places hers wasn't e.g "will she feel like she has failed"...
Well - no because I had spent 4 months telling her what a snapshot the 11+ was of her ability !I had also sold the local school sooo well that when she got offered a place on the waiting list a couple of weeks later, she wasn't sure!
Its a cliche but it is true, children are remarkably adaptable and "move on" much quicker than we do.

Poor you, all of you, the waiting will be over soon

panichead · Post by **panichead** » Mon Feb 08, 2010 6:28 pm

Thanks Chelmsford mum, you are so right - she is much calmer than me !

TP123 · Post by **TP123** » Mon Feb 08, 2010 7:14 pm

Hi Panichead

This is quite "geeky" - but a few weeks ago when I too was starting to panic about March 1 I began reading this thread:
http://www.elevenplusexams.co.uk/forum/ ... php?t=4995

It is a long thread but shows posts from the parents from last year - and reading through it kind of allows you to get a glimpse of how one could cope with the good and bad news. You do need a lot of time to walk through the week of March 1.

NOTLEY PARENTS · Post by **NOTLEY PARENTS** » Mon Feb 08, 2010 7:46 pm

Poor you, all of you, the waiting will be over soon

We are starting to sweat here too and look forward to March 1st with a mixture of excitement and dread!!

panichead · Post by **panichead** » Mon Feb 08, 2010 8:12 pm

Yeh I am hovering between desperately wanting to know and then OMG I don't want the 1st to come. Our fantastic tutor has just given me a copy of the maths and english papers but I am too scared to look at them and have hidden them away in case DD sees them, tells me her answers and I realise she has them all wrong !! Nothing like believing in your kids is there ???

HammersDad · Post by **HammersDad** » Tue Feb 09, 2010 12:02 am

Still can't believe that you have to wait for an email rather than viewing online - that's torture!

moved · Post by **moved** » Wed Feb 10, 2010 12:53 am

I oversold the alternative school so DD was not wonderfully impressed about passing for her place. It took her a while and a lot of help from older hands on this forum. She is very happy now though.

panichead · Post by **panichead** » Wed Feb 10, 2010 2:59 pm

Oh no seems you can't do right for doing wrong. I will keep telling her that she will go to the school that is bested suited for her ability and hope that works. At them moment she is more concerned about which duvet to take to her sleepover next week and what earrings go with her JLS jumper best!!! This is hard work isn't it? Is it me or has time stood still of late? Although it's only two and half weeks (is that all??!!!!!) it feels like an eternity.