Inde or Grammer

[monsoon]

Hi,

My DS is taking the 11+ this year. She is taking the exams for Grammar as well as for Indies..
She is capable of passing the Grammar schools exam (Bucks) as well as Indies (I hope !!). If we take the Indies route, then we will not be able to have family holidays... cut down on the extra activities, outings.. We will be struggling all the way... Once we take this route, we will have to send second one to the Indies as well... However, I am willing to struggle if it is worth it..
How much difference is there between Indies and Grammar?? I am talking about good Indies and good grammar like (bucks grammar and St Albans Idie).. If my child get into grammar, is it still worth to send it to Inde... What Ides provide extra than the grammar??????

My head saying Grammar would be OK.. but I don't want to look back few years later and think.. What if???

Monsoon

Anyone with one child in Grammar and One child in Indies?? or any other experience?

[sherry_d]

Moonson there is another thread going on how to afford indies that answers some of your questions.

Go with your heart. If you are thinking grammar would be ok, just go for it. Its a commitment to pay indie fees and you must really have a strong conviction it is the right one so the skimping doesnt hurt. My daughter is doing grammar too and I think she may pass but this is really our backup. The indie of our choice would be so much better for her as she has struggled with other issues like confidence etc and I feel she would just get lost among a sea of other girls in our local grammar. To be honest its dangerous to lump all school together even indies - they are all very different. Look at the schools and see what you feel. We saw 5 indies in total and I can say I dismissed 3 of them straight off as they just didnt suit my child.

[Snowdrops]

Wise words from Sherry.

There should be no 'superiority' in any school, be it Grammar, Indie or non-selective. Each school should be looked at individually and decided upon as to whether or not it meets your child's needs.

A school is only good if you like it.

[pheasantchick]

To use a cliche, visit the schools. You will know what feels right for your child and your family as a whole.

[yogkruti]

That's so true! Every school has a certain "environment" / "attitude".

I know that my DC would not like the Indie environment... although he would be comfortable with the rich and wealthy, but at heart I'm sure he is er.. "rustic" (I hope so!... like me )

He does seem to make friends with lots of "posh" girls though... which is slightly worrying

[Waiting_For_Godot]

Rustic? I think I may have to use that word when describing my black sheep! He too does not necessarily suit inde, but o dear...

Actually he is going through a pase of dropping virtually every consonant from his words. When I told him to talk posh (yes, I have to qualms about taking on the plum accent ) he said, "All my friends think being posh is uncool." This coming from boys at one of the most expensive schools in Glos and virtually all are posh - they just don't know it!!!

[Amber]

That's so true! Every school has a certain "environment" / "attitude".

I know that my DC would not like the Indie environment... although he would be comfortable with the rich and wealthy, but at heart I'm sure he is er.. "rustic" (I hope so!... like me )

If I might just point out gently a bit of a contradiction here: every school is different, but my child would not like the indie environment...as if all indies were the same. Indies are just as different from each other as comps and GSs are. My DD is not from a rich background and neither are her indie friends - single parents, office workers, shop workers, doctors, dentists, teachers. The only uniting factor among people she knows is a desire to escape bullying experienced in other environments.

My kids are about as 'rustic' as it gets!

[pheasantchick]

Bullying occurs in all schools. My god daughter was bullied during the last year in an indie.

[Amber]

Yes of course. I wasn't making a point about bullying, just about not lumping all schools of one type together.

[Waiting_For_Godot]

There a lot of schools that would suit a child but they tend not to suit the parent!