1st March disappointments

Eleven Plus (11+) in South West Hertfordshire

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akpanto
Posts: 31
Joined: Sun Mar 09, 2008 1:55 am

1st March disappointments

Post by akpanto »

Firstly, congratulations to everyone who received satisfactory outcomes yesterday, and heartfelt commiserations to those who felt a tinge of disappointment that things did not go the way they'd hoped for.

I've been in both camps myself, and while for some the 11 Plus journey has ended in joy and gladness for others it's stretching even further with waiting lists, appeals, alternate school arrangements etc to contemplate and consider.

No one wants to be the one to put a damp squib on the celebrations and euphoria of others, but as an onlooker this year I felt it would be helpful to start this post as an opportunity for those disappointed by yesterday's outcomes to draw on the experience and support from other members of the forum in deciding what to do next - as sometimes it can be difficult to "think straight" initially.

Feel free to contribute as you see fit, as I'd like to believe it's one big happy family and everyone will try and help as best as they can.
mangomum
Posts: 137
Joined: Fri Jul 29, 2011 12:33 pm

Re: 1st March disappointments

Post by mangomum »

Hi AKPanto

I have just PMed you.

Many many thanks for all your advice. You took time to give me detailed advice which I greatly appreciated.

Best
MangoMum
MangoMum
DobbysSock
Posts: 22
Joined: Sat Jun 18, 2011 9:50 pm

Re: 1st March disappointments

Post by DobbysSock »

Hi there, we found out yesterday that we've been given our sixth choice of school (including SAHS it's actually our seventh choice) and I haven't slept a wink all night. There is absolutely nothing we can do and I'm devastated.

The local school has a terrible reputation and we've been given a place due to the fact that we can see the school from our kitchen window, it's that near. I really feel as though I've failed my daughter.
PlutoMum
Posts: 38
Joined: Tue Sep 13, 2011 12:32 am

Re: 1st March disappointments

Post by PlutoMum »

Akpanto - thanks for starting this thread. This is a terrible day for many of us disappointed parents. I'm walking around like a zombie today and literally just want to curl up in a ball.

DobbysSock - I really feel for you. I am so sorry. Hopefully someone can offer you helpful advice. My head is in a spin so can't be more use to you I'm afraid other than letting you know you're not alone.

We wanted QE but got local comp (which is an ok school so could be worse). We got offer at St Albans but had really needed a scholarship. Our very difficult decision now is take the comp or sacrifice a lot to pay the indie fees. I have no idea how we are going to make this decision. DH and I are panicking and going round in circles.

Our score at QE was 336 so I don't think we have any chance at all of a waiting list place.

We have failed our son so badly by being ignorant of this whole 11+ process until September when it was far too late. It's impossible to get into these schools without proper preparation. I just wish someone had told us this 2 years ago.
lastminutemum
Posts: 10
Joined: Sun Oct 09, 2011 10:35 pm

Re: 1st March disappointments

Post by lastminutemum »

Hi Plutomum,

To feel like you have failed your child is horrible. Here is what I know.
There will be multiple boys on the same score, so although there may only appear to be a few marks between the last boy to get in and others on the waiting list, it could actually mean 50 or 60 boys.
A few years ago 336 would have got you in off the wait list, however places have become more competitive all round, why? recession, better understanding of the process by parents, it doesn't really matter.
Do a search on a poster called CMaher, whose son was on the waiting list with a score of 338.


LMM
Charl39
Posts: 378
Joined: Tue Jul 07, 2009 1:43 pm
Location: London

Re: 1st March disappointments

Post by Charl39 »

Plutomum - your post makes me very sad. Please stop beating yourself up about this. You did your best with what you knew and your DS' school is not rhe be all and end all. Your DS has loving and supportive parents, that will take him far in making a success of his education. You will be with him whatever school he goes to. Also things change. I've been through these emotions 2 years ago while DD was on a waiting list. It all turned out well in the end, as lots of people on here will testify, either by achieving a place at the desired school or being very happy at the allocated school.

Please try to move on from the disappointment and be positive for your DS - he must be really feeling this too. I hope this doesnt sound patronising in any way, I do feel for you but all is not lost - your DS will do well, have faith. Good luck with your decision making.
Charl39
Apsh
Posts: 34
Joined: Fri Dec 23, 2011 10:38 am

Re: 1st March disappointments

Post by Apsh »

Plutomum,
I am in the same boat as you... my DS got a score of 350 but did not get through to QE, other option local comp...
we were also ignorant about the 11 plus admissions procudure, post code, etc and feel as if we have failed him...
he is also bright with a reading age of 16+... last year kids with scores 344 had got offers on 1st march,,, but this year the bar seems to be raised..
I am in a turmoil and have not slept at all and can understand how you must be feeling..
lets keep our fingers crossed and hope for the best...
sorry everyone for ranting on, but helped sharing my feelings
akpanto
Posts: 31
Joined: Sun Mar 09, 2008 1:55 am

Re: 1st March disappointments

Post by akpanto »

Hi DobbysSock,

I know exactly what you're going through as I was in exactly the same position some years ago when my DS was not even offered one of the 6 schools we'd put on the form and was given the local sink school.

What I did was to first of all establish where he was on the waiting lists for the various schools and understand why he did not get an automatic place - for the 1st (which was selective), I knew he hadn't made the cutoff and the 2nd he didn't get in because we were non-Catholics. The others were distance-related.

I then trawled the Appeals section of this website for information and decided I had nothing to lose by lodging appeals for all the schools (including the selective school but excluding the Catholic school as we couldn't manoeuvre around that). The appeal for the selective school was first, and although we didn't get through (as expected), the experience of the preparation and actual appeal stood us in good stead for the next one and we succeeded at the next appeal on a technicality.

That technicality was crafted based on information I'd gleaned from this website and doing some other homework (and I'm happy to share that if you PM me). I can't reiterate how much of a confidence boost I gained from the experience of the 1st appeal and that really made a difference in my representations at the one we succeeded with.

In addition, without knowing how the appeals were going to go we started looking at indies as I was adamant DS was not going to the sink school and I was going to do whatever it took to get him a better place. I do appreciate not everyone may have those sorts of choices, but that was where we were and the options we had to consider.

So all hope is not entirely lost but you need to start moving quickly because options will start diminishing as time goes by. I strongly recommend visiting the appeals section and to start putting together your appeals as you have absolutely nothing to lose and everything to gain.

I hope you take some encouragement from my post.

Regards,
Akpanto
Apsh
Posts: 34
Joined: Fri Dec 23, 2011 10:38 am

Re: 1st March disappointments

Post by Apsh »

Dear Akpanto,

thankyou for starting the thread.... i really helps when you are feeling so down in the dumps and worst you have to pretend you are ok in front of the kids....
Let us all hope things work out for us and keep fingers crossed...
ALL THE BEST TO EVERYONE....
thanks
Devoted mad dad
Posts: 17
Joined: Sat Mar 03, 2012 2:11 am

Re: 1st March disappointments

Post by Devoted mad dad »

So proud of DS did so well gaining places at HABS and Latymer , which was 2nd choice.
Missed out on QE boys, which was 1st choice, solely because of distance ,with score of 350 .
Maybe it's the ego thing , but would be nice to be offered a place at QE as it was the 1st
choice after they sort out the waiting list places.
Will keep an eye on blue lagoons post regarding lowest scores to gain entry at QE. :D
Good luck to all waiting with anticipation and to all the successful parents.
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