Time to give up if child doesn't care about 11+?!

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MelW
Posts: 90
Joined: Fri Oct 06, 2006 9:33 pm

Time to give up if child doesn't care about 11+?!

Post by MelW »

My son just doesn't seem bothered about the 11+ and the accompanying revision as he doesn't understand what is at stake. Should I just give up trying to push him to work harder and look for alternative education? He is averaging 80% across all the revision we do and has a July birthday.
Guest55
Posts: 16254
Joined: Mon Feb 12, 2007 2:21 pm

Post by Guest55 »

Have you got a good Upper as a back up? If so it's not as worrying. Look at the prospectuses of schools and get him involved in noting differences - what are his interests? Which school best caters for those? Open evenings can be useful so go to those as early as you can - PM me if you need more help.
MelW
Posts: 90
Joined: Fri Oct 06, 2006 9:33 pm

Post by MelW »

No I haven't got a good Upper as a back up, very long shot of a comprehensive. I just don't know when it might be time to throw up my hands rather than go through the stress of pushing him and being disappointed when he doesn't do his revision well.
Catherine
Posts: 1348
Joined: Sun Dec 04, 2005 4:47 pm
Location: Berks,Bucks

Post by Catherine »

In my opinion, a 9/10 year old is much too young to understand what is at stake. How can he fully appreciates the consequenses at his age? The 11+ VR practice is particularly daunting, uninteresting and repetitive anyway.

If is you think that your child will benefit for going to grammar school, but give up the practice, you may seriously regret it in a few months time.

If you have used all your powers of persuasion, may be you want to help him, sit down with him and do it together. Try to make it a game, a competition, do smaller chunks at a time, use bribery, use the CDs from this site, ask for any tip to makes VR more fun...
But unless you are abslotuely convinced that your child hasn't got the ability, don't give up. Just my opinion...
Suesole
Posts: 153
Joined: Thu Jul 19, 2007 9:38 am
Location: Bucks border / Berks

Post by Suesole »

Hi MelW

My son is the same...We have tried everything. Bibery and corruption but he really isn't interested. He finds the work fairly easy and when pushed to do it gets most of it right. We have had tears and tantrums, shouting sessions the lot ! But as stated above I don't think he is aware of what is at stake. We don't have a great comp near us either. Have you visited the local grammar schools and taken your son with you to their open evenings? If he sees what they have to offer this might encourage him.
We took my son to see Burnham Grammar and his school arranged a day at Hershel and when he talks about secondary school he states these as the one's he wants to go to. As you say if he is getting about 80% you don't have too far to go. We are going fairly easy over the holiday and once they are back at school and back into work mode we are going to try papers (one a night) up to the exam to try and increase his understanding and speed. Are you just going for the Bucks paper as this is just VR only and the papers are sat early Oct anyway so not much longer to go...
Good luck. :roll:
Guest55
Posts: 16254
Joined: Mon Feb 12, 2007 2:21 pm

Post by Guest55 »

Mel W,

Don't give up - Catherine's advice is sound - make it as much fun as possible - try the demo CD first to see whether he takes to it.

GOOD LUCK!!
MelW
Posts: 90
Joined: Fri Oct 06, 2006 9:33 pm

Post by MelW »

Thanks for that Catherine. I know he would benefit from a grammar and I know he is bright enough, it is just the application that seems to be missing. I guess it is down to me to keep encouraging him and be positive. Very hard at the mo! He finds it all so boring...
Guest55
Posts: 16254
Joined: Mon Feb 12, 2007 2:21 pm

Post by Guest55 »

If he gets bored easily you must 'encourage' him to aim for a Grammar - he sounds like he would benefit from the challenge of working alongside other able children.
MelW
Posts: 90
Joined: Fri Oct 06, 2006 9:33 pm

Post by MelW »

Yes, I have tried. Maybe when we look around the schools in Sept it will become more 'real' for him.
Mike
Posts: 625
Joined: Thu Jan 12, 2006 4:29 pm

Post by Mike »

Hi MelW

It is the border line students who benefit most from a grammar school education, if you think he is in this category then keep working with him.

Adopt a team spirit attitude, let him know that everyone is working together for him and that he is part of the team.

Look at alternatives to boring, pen and paper work.

Work the 11+ practice around his social life and not his social life around the 11+.

Good Luck

Regards

Mike
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