Cheltenham boys to STRS

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fizzy_pop
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Mar 01, 2013 12:33 pm

Cheltenham boys to STRS

Post by fizzy_pop »

My DS is off to Tommies in September. There is a second boy from his school also going there but he is quietly nervous about the move. :? And doesn't know any others starting this year. Although we know older boys who're already there.

I was wondering if there were any others transferring from Cheltenham and beyond and whether any parents would be interesting in getting together over the summer. I am thinking picnics and football in the park to allow the boys to bond a little. And without forcing the issue or being too stage managed or expensive. :)

Also I would be keen to meet other parents in the same/similar boat to compare and contrast the joining experiences and for some mutual support during the transition.

Fizzy
PaterGloucester
Posts: 152
Joined: Sat Oct 23, 2010 10:53 pm

Re: Cheltenham boys to STRS

Post by PaterGloucester »

I know this feels like a huge issue, but please, please don't worry about it. The selective schools are very aware that by their nature they will have many children who are the sole representatives of their primary schools, and they ensure lots of bonding and (almost !) enforced friend-making in the first few days and weeks.

Unless your child is pathologically shy, a month into term he will have made lots of new friends – and in the very unusual case that he hasn't, the school will be on to it.

At Pates they were chucked headlong into communal activities (mostly musical, even if you only played the triangle); at STR they have a camp where everyone mucks in. Even if you are going to STR with six of your school mates they will be deliberately split across the four houses, so all the boys are pretty much in the same situation.

One of the quickest ways boys make friends is sharing the school bus. If your DS is intending to do this I think you will find the problem sorted before he even reaches the school.

So, once again, I'm sure you will find this will evaporate into a non-issue.
capers123
Posts: 1865
Joined: Sun May 13, 2007 9:03 pm
Location: Gloucestershire

Re: Cheltenham boys to STRS

Post by capers123 »

PaterGloucester wrote:At Pates they were chucked headlong into communal activities (mostly musical, even if you only played the triangle)
[rant] Excuse me! One field I perform in has a problem: some of the ensembles get dancers who are not needed in a particular dance to play percussion instruments. They have an assumption that everyone can bash an instrument in time. This proves so untrue - I've heard so many out-of-time and badly played percussion instruments from these groups that I now actively avoid them. Often the reason these dancers are 'available' is they are the weaker dancers partly due to poor rhythm.

Whilst there is considerably less training needed to play a triangle than an oboe, both can sound bad when played by the untrained. Percussionists have to train on a huge variety of instruments, each with very different techniques. For instance, playing a cymbal with a 'cello bow vs timpani vs marimba vs tubular bells vs latin percussion vs...

Pate's, along with all grammar schools, have peripatetic percussion teachers available to teach the whole range from timps to tuned to drum kit. [/rant]
Capers
Amber
Posts: 8058
Joined: Thu Sep 24, 2009 11:59 am

Re: Cheltenham boys to STRS

Post by Amber »

capers123 wrote: Whilst there is considerably less training needed to play a triangle than an oboe, both can sound bad when played by the untrained.
I know other opinions are available, and am ready to hear from those who play it about how jolly and upbeat and happy it can be; but to me one of those sounds bad even when played by the highly trained. And it isn't the triangle. :shock:
stroudydad
Posts: 2246
Joined: Sat Oct 08, 2011 2:25 pm

Re: Cheltenham boys to STRS

Post by stroudydad »

And when the triangle is played out of time it is clearly visible( or audible) to everyone... Where is the like button again?
fizzy_pop
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Mar 01, 2013 12:33 pm

Re: Cheltenham boys to STRS

Post by fizzy_pop »

I know this feels like a huge issue, but please, please don't worry about it. The selective schools are very aware that by their nature they will have many children who are the sole representatives of their primary schools, and they ensure lots of bonding and (almost !) enforced friend-making in the first few days and weeks.
@Pater I appreciate Tommies and the other schools are awesome at helping kids make the transition. Indeed I have previously commented on how good the induction process is. However that doesn't change the quiet nervousness that has been brewing in my household over the last few weeks. I can and do reassure. And my DS logically knows it will be OK. He has changed schools due to house moves previously and it has been OK.

However that doesn't address his anxiety until September and that is a lot of *brewing* time. Something like this addresses it sooner and if there are parents in a similar situation who'd be interested in meeting up I'd like to hear from them. Plus it might be fun.
FluffyCat
Posts: 759
Joined: Thu Oct 06, 2011 11:26 am

Re: Cheltenham boys to STRS

Post by FluffyCat »

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Last edited by FluffyCat on Sun Oct 13, 2013 1:22 pm, edited 1 time in total.
scaredycat
Posts: 105
Joined: Mon Aug 27, 2012 6:36 pm

Re: Cheltenham boys to STRS

Post by scaredycat »

We were in your shoes two years ago and my DC was really, really anxious. I sometimes think that Year 7's could do with starting in the last week of Summer term so that there isn't that nerve racking build up over the summer. Transfer day just made DC more anxious I think! BUT, DC has got the most fantastic form tutor who immediately spotted that DC was anxious and made the time to have a chat to reassure (we are eternally grateful!). My DC has never looked back and loves school now. Please be reassured, it's a huge step for them and its hard for us not being able to do it with them, but they really do settle in. We did things like a practise bus run in the holidays and made sure the group we knew all had each others Mum's mobile numbers saved on their phones so that they could get hold of any of us if any of them had a problem. We found the bus was a good way to make new friends and socialise a bit too.
PaterGloucester
Posts: 152
Joined: Sat Oct 23, 2010 10:53 pm

Re: Cheltenham boys to STRS

Post by PaterGloucester »

Fizzy_Pop - did his school have a visit from Mr Daniels, head of Year 7 ? He provided a good Q&A session for the boys at my DS2's school (he's going to STR this September too) and is (apparently) a very reassuring presence. If not, perhaps Mr D would consider a visit before the end of term.

Making the jump to big school is a challenge (DS1, who's at Pates, had never been on a bus before, never mind on his own, so we were worried for the first few days !) but it took no time to settle in. Perhaps as a result DS2 is blasé about the whole process, as are we.

I appreciate things are different for your son, but I think that the forthcoming Induction Day, plus the Summer Science School will help familiarise him with the school and allay at least some of his concerns. If you know older boys there I'm sure they would chat to him about who's who (kids love praising/demonising teachers), and the more familiar it all seems, the better.
paddywins
Posts: 6
Joined: Fri Mar 01, 2013 6:02 am

Re: Cheltenham boys to STRS

Post by paddywins »

my boy would be up for a game of soccer/picnic. 66 days holiday start Saturday so need to fill the days!
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