Spare a word or two

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drainedMum
Posts: 2
Joined: Wed Oct 23, 2013 2:00 pm

Spare a word or two

Post by drainedMum »

Hi People,

Sorry to be a killjoy. I know people come here to celebrate and share their DCs successes. But I am here to share my disappointment.
My son did not get into any of the grammars or selective schools we applied for. We worked extremely hard throughout the year to no avail. Covered most of the materials available online.
My son achieved:
DAO 200+
Latymer 390+
QEB 210
MHC 124

Teacher advised that son is not a grammar school material and he will struggle in grammar :evil: Maybe she has appoint.

My question is what is grammar school material? is it a gift or a talent? Can it be attained through had work?

All is not lost though, my son started of at 50% in everything and towards the end he was getting 80% in Math and 70% in English
.
Don`t know what more I could have done?

Please feel free to put in a word or two, or even a critism

DrainedMum
tiffinboys
Posts: 8022
Joined: Fri Nov 11, 2011 11:00 pm
Location: Surrey

Re: Spare a word or two

Post by tiffinboys »

drainedMum wrote: All is not lost though, my son started of at 50% in everything and towards the end he was getting 80% in Math and 70% in English
That itself is an achievement and if he continues working this hard, he would achieve good grades and an even more valuable lesson in working hard. Please encourage him to continue his hard work. Next target is SATs. Wish him all the best.
silverysea
Posts: 1105
Joined: Fri Mar 04, 2011 3:32 pm

Re: Spare a word or two

Post by silverysea »

I'm really sorry to see such disappointment. It may be hard to believe right now, but those are amazing improvements and those efforts are not wasted-these are super-tough schools and tests for everyone.

You have put in an amazing effort-now you need to turn your attention to getting him happily through year 6 and on into the right school for him and getting him off there with flying colours.

Have you other DCs to consider?
piggys
Posts: 1636
Joined: Wed Jun 29, 2011 9:29 am

Re: Spare a word or two

Post by piggys »

DrainedMum - it looks like your DS only missed out by a short margin.....if you look at the numbers applying for those schools he has done really well.

You ask a good question: is it innate ability or coaching to the exams which wins places - and I would say it is definitely the first, with increasing importance on the second as years go by and competition becomes ever fiercer.

It sounds like your DS will do well in a non-selective where he will be at the upper end of any streams/bands the school may have....this will make him feel really good about himself an boost his confidence significantly.......plus he has the most important thing of all - you. A fully supportive parent who really cares about his education and will go all out to do her best for him. Congrats to you both :D
IronMikeTyson
Posts: 612
Joined: Wed Nov 23, 2011 1:52 pm
Location: Shamballa

Re: Spare a word or two

Post by IronMikeTyson »

We know lots of children who did not pass any exam. They were bright and well prepared.Luck and handling stress plays a part.

Your child had go and that is a great experience for him.Children develop at different rates- he has a chance to shine at GCSEs and life has many opportunities.

The kids who have passed have still not gained any qualifications-there is ample time for him to show his potential.
"To err is human;to forgive ,divine"
southbucks3
Posts: 3579
Joined: Tue Dec 18, 2012 11:59 am

Re: Spare a word or two

Post by southbucks3 »

drainedMum wrote:Teacher advised that son is not a grammar school material and he will struggle in grammar :evil: Maybe she has appoint.

My question is what is grammar school material? is it a gift or a talent? Can it be attained through had work?

DrainedMum
Please do not ever think your dc is a failure, he is probably just programmed to a different way of thinking, or maybe has yet to reach his potential.

Hard work is very important, but it is also combined with the ability to look at a new piece of written information and think.."oh yeah, i can do that, but i could also do it this way" and be brave enough to have a go, whether right or wrong.

My ds3 would hate grammar, i know this for sure, as he can graft like a demon, can create anthing out of bits of wood and paper, but would fall to bits if he was asked to solve an academic problem using his own concepts. This does not imo make him any less bright than his bruvs, but his brain just works differently, he would be the one working out how the house martins had managed to make a nest in the eaves of the class room while his school chums were working out problems to solve using simultaneous equations.

Good luck, and give him heaps and heaps and heaps of praise for even the simplest of achievements, his confidence will be at a real low right now bless him.
mad?
Posts: 5621
Joined: Thu May 01, 2008 6:27 pm
Location: london

Re: Spare a word or two

Post by mad? »

Big hugs and echoing everything other posters have said ***
mad?
drainedMum
Posts: 2
Joined: Wed Oct 23, 2013 2:00 pm

Re: Spare a word or two

Post by drainedMum »

Thank you all for the kind words. This is really encouraging. Thanks!!!

Now the hard work continues.....

Silversea - I have DS2 to go through this again, but I am blessed with this one... with minimal effort he gets good marks I just don`t know how he does it!!!.....
Last edited by drainedMum on Wed Oct 23, 2013 3:39 pm, edited 1 time in total.
southbucks3
Posts: 3579
Joined: Tue Dec 18, 2012 11:59 am

Re: Spare a word or two

Post by southbucks3 »

drainedMum wrote:Thank you all for the kind words. This is really encouraging. Thanks!!!

Now the hard work continues.....

I have DS2 to go through this again, but I am blessed with this one... with minimal effort he is getting 90+ in maths and 80+ in english (GL)... I just don`t know how he does it!!!.....
Even more reason to really big up dc1 on everything he is fab at!
leanmeamum
Posts: 736
Joined: Sat Dec 03, 2011 4:14 pm

Re: Spare a word or two

Post by leanmeamum »

GS are not the end of the journey - hard work and dedication will result in success.

Your son has done extremely well achieving high standards in Maths and English. Looking at his Latymer Ranking, he is in the top 20% of the applicants, which is no mean feat. 210 for QE is a pass, unfortunately they don't have space for all the children who passed!

These are just 2 figures - the results from the other 2 schools also put him in the top 1/4 of all applicants. He has done well and should be proud of his achievement. Keep the hard work up and he will do well in any school.

I have seen lots of children take this as a personal challenge and prove teachers and GSs wrong at 16. With good GCSE results lots of schools will happily offer him a place - IF he still wants it. Stay positive and think where he would have been without the hard work he has put in.
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