Coping with the pressure?

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NS1
Posts: 52
Joined: Mon Sep 12, 2011 1:19 pm

Coping with the pressure?

Post by NS1 »

We have just come back from a much needed 1 week holiday, but throughout this period I couldn't help feeling the pressure of the upcoming tests and couldn't relax. DS seemed to have a good time though!

Are other parents feeling the same or am I panicking unnecessarily? DS's scores in the practice tests have dropped by about 15% since we came back. Not sure whether to increase practice and risk burnout or just keep my fingers crossed now?
Vicster
Posts: 89
Joined: Tue May 20, 2014 1:29 pm

Re: Coping with the pressure?

Post by Vicster »

We had a dip in scores a few days before we went away for a week. Our dip was around 20% :shock: and I noticed that DS was becoming stressed and fraught about it all. I took the decision that DS would not be doing any more practice until we returned from holiday. DS was not happy with my decision and wanted to continue with his practising (we had been doing 45 minutes a day on weekdays). We came back at the weekend and have done some practice over the last few days and the scores have gone back to their pre-stress levels.

I think a break for children when their scores dip might be what is needed.
wilmslowmum
Posts: 96
Joined: Sun Mar 11, 2012 9:13 pm

Re: Coping with the pressure?

Post by wilmslowmum »

Hi, Firstly vicster, how fortunate for you that your DS is so consciencous my DS would love it if i stopped him from working!! I am so examed out myself so i dont know how our children must feel, the exams can't come quick enough so we can finally throw all the gl and bond books away. I seem to find now that my Ds scores similar marks on any papers regardless of any extra input ie going over mistakes as next time he will make a mistake on something he got correct before! I think this is probably natural for most children apart from the genius type! My DS is usually in a mood because he has to do it in the first place which obviously doesnt help. I find he is much better with a tutor rather than me, trouble is i havent the time or money to take him to one everyday!! So now i think we have probably done all we can and will have to keep our fingers crossed for a positive outcome on the day. Back to school next week so we wont have as much time to spend on 11plus work which i feel may be a good thing for my Ds as i think he has well and truly had enough!! This week he has gone to a summer school for 11plus work and fun! He seems to be enjoying it so i wont be doing any extra work with him , i think he would flip if I suggested that and who could blame him. Looking forward to getting our relationship back without constant battles (well less battles there are always going to be some with a pre teen !!) Good luck to all our children over the next few weeks.
Oshosh
Posts: 265
Joined: Tue Oct 16, 2012 9:35 pm

Re: Coping with the pressure?

Post by Oshosh »

hello everyone,

this time last year, i felt, we(DS and I) were just repeating ourselves, and couldn't wait for the exams to come. we went away for 2 weeks(late july), and DS did no 11plus work except to read story books. And he came back fully recharged from the holidays. A break from books did some good for him.

just to let you know what DS did do 4 weeks before the exam-- we had our our own mock exams. I conducted it :wink: with all the timing pressures and somewhat similar experiences of what one would undergo in an exam room....well i tried to set sceanario that way :lol: you would have probably guessed now why we were so eager for the exams !!!!!

and also to be prepared for the day.....the journey to school, parking and the queue at school. well we did a mock run of it the week before the exam. we took a drive, sussed out where we were going to park, and did the walk, showed DS where he would line up to go in....and so on and so forth. seeing the school and the walk around it- helped DS with his nerves.

Pls do not worry- easy for me to say :? these exams are hard work, and i would, if i can, give a trophy for each and every child for even wanting to attempt it. :D

good luck everyone

oshosh
Vicster
Posts: 89
Joined: Tue May 20, 2014 1:29 pm

Re: Coping with the pressure?

Post by Vicster »

Hi Wilmslowmum. I don't think my DS is actually that conscientious, it's more a case of him thinking that his chances will be non existent if he doesn't do enough practice and getting stressed about other children working harder. He only showed any willingness to do any work after the open evening as he really liked the school and realised that he needed to do something if he stood any chance of getting a place.
I'm not sure what his chances are of getting a place as we haven't used a tutor at any point or attended any preparation classes or mock exam days. Money has been tight so I have relied on doing some practice at home using GL papers and bond practice papers.
I am quite worried that children who have had the benefit of tutoring will have a huge advantage and will get the higher scores but I'm trying not to overthink it and pass my anxieties onto DS as he is enough of a worrier without my 'help'.
Not long to go now and then we can all breathe a sigh of relief.
Vicster
Posts: 89
Joined: Tue May 20, 2014 1:29 pm

Re: Coping with the pressure?

Post by Vicster »

To put it in simpler terms: DS has gone more down the blind panic route (after the June open evening) than the conscientious from the outset route :lol:
wilmslowmum
Posts: 96
Joined: Sun Mar 11, 2012 9:13 pm

Re: Coping with the pressure?

Post by wilmslowmum »

Hi Vicster, Hats off to your DS for working hard, i guess having a tutor is an advantage if your child doesnt respond that well to you, but your DS sounds like he is very willing to learn. Our tutor has helped with certain maths issues which i didnt quite understand !! But all of the GL papers have been done at home. I dont think my DS has really considered which school he might go to yet , he is very laid back, sounds the opposite to your DS. Good luck to your DS he sounds like he really deserves to gain a place at his chosen school.
Nimbus
Posts: 57
Joined: Sat May 18, 2013 12:23 pm

Re: Coping with the pressure?

Post by Nimbus »

Phew- that has reassured me a bit- DC has also dipped scores over the past couple of weeks, probably a good 20%, I've decided to let up on practice papers and go back to Bond 10 minutes to get the basics up to speed. pass me the wine! :wink:
NS1
Posts: 52
Joined: Mon Sep 12, 2011 1:19 pm

Re: Coping with the pressure?

Post by NS1 »

I've let up on the practice papers too as DS's marks seem to be consistent. Can't wait for it to be over now!
yunny
Posts: 63
Joined: Thu Aug 27, 2009 11:55 pm

Re: Coping with the pressure?

Post by yunny »

Hi all, yes I know the feeling, my dd is sitting Alty girls and Loreto however, we are ooc and heard that it is very unlikely Alty will take in girls from as far as Warrington!! Also, we are non catholic so all in all was seriously contemplating is all this tutoring by myself and hubby a complete waste of time? But after 2 years of home tuturing, dd might as well give it a go. We have not taken on a private tutor, just gl, bond,etc, dd doesn't mind sitting the exams, quite calm about the whole thing, sounds like your ds wilmslowmum??

And yes, everyday dd has been doing 20min of either vr, nvr or maths, Saturday is a timed paper and Sunday is her day off!! :D

I cant wait to get rid of all the books after these 2 exams, I'm sure most of u agree on this!! :D :)
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