DS at end of tether poor thing!

Discussion of the 11 Plus

Moderators: Section Moderators, Forum Moderators

11 Plus Mocks - Practise the real exam experience - Book Now
Stressed?Moi?
Posts: 1844
Joined: Mon Aug 01, 2011 11:28 am

DS at end of tether poor thing!

Post by Stressed?Moi? »

Well, DS had been doing reasonably well with his papers 70-75% on papers at home this week, but better in his mock. However, yesterday he fell apart with just 24% on NVR. He has suddenly lost all confidence in what was, at the start of this process, his best subject. The long and short of it appears that he is just so sick of the whole process - as indeed are we all I suspect. He only had his 10th birthday at the end of August and I think it's showing. We've decided to do absolutely nothing this week. Risky strategy I know, but if he is starting to get upset he really isn't going to perform well on the day. Also, if he doesn't know it by now (and he certainly doesn't), he never will. Feeling a bit helpless at the moment as I was hoping he could have lasted these final few days. It's not just about the exam though, we've got to think of him as a person and if it's affecting him too negatively it may be a life-long thing.
crazydaisy
Posts: 90
Joined: Thu Oct 15, 2009 3:06 pm

Re: DS at end of tether poor thing!

Post by crazydaisy »

Absolutely agree with you ,and I think a lot of people including us are in the same position. We've got to keep going for another 2 weeks - aagh! There's not much work being done now, what with yr 6 homework as well, and my DD is so bored by the whole thing. If I tell her not to worry, there are plenty of other schools she gets furious and says I'm making her think she's going to fail - and if I say she's sure to do great I'm worried she'll think it's make or break! Can't win! :shock: I think your strategy is spot on, its almost worth giving them 9-10yr questions just to build confidence now. I'm trying to do odd bits from 10 min tests, but I think it's probably more useful just to tell them how marvellous they are as often as possible! My older DD recovered very quickly after the stress so am sure your DS and my younger one will too. :)
berks_mum
Posts: 939
Joined: Sat Dec 28, 2013 4:52 pm

Re: DS at end of tether poor thing!

Post by berks_mum »

Stressed?Moi?, my DD is also showing early signs of burn out plus school has started last week so high season for viral infections. I am going to rest her as much as she wants.
You may also want to try a midway, DC doesn't give up completely nor does everything alone, do the papers along with them. I think that is also a way to learn. You can pretend you are the DC doing the papers and your DS marks your paper, times you and also helps you when you need help. It will boost his confidence and make him more alert as DCs enjoy finding parents' mistakes and correct them :-)
Good luck to your DS for the exams on 13th.


(x posted)
Yamin151
Posts: 2405
Joined: Fri Aug 30, 2013 8:30 am

Re: DS at end of tether poor thing!

Post by Yamin151 »

I had twins go through it last year. We did absolutely nothing in the week leading up to the exam, not a bean. Both qualified for grammar. I am convinced it actually helped to have that break, don't worry, you won't do any harm and you may actually positively influence the result.
MamaBear
Posts: 574
Joined: Mon Jul 15, 2013 6:17 pm

Re: DS at end of tether poor thing!

Post by MamaBear »

Dear stressedmoi, sorry to hear that, if it helps many others are in the same boat as you, and can't wait for this to be over.
My ds just turned 10 on the 29th Aug but it gives me hope that this will be taken into account.
Keep boosting him up and I wish you all the best and hope you have good news in October.
Stressed?Moi?
Posts: 1844
Joined: Mon Aug 01, 2011 11:28 am

Re: DS at end of tether poor thing!

Post by Stressed?Moi? »

Thanks so much guys. It's good to know that we aren't being completely barmy. He has started back to school today, with a completely new class. We asked for him to be changed as the teacher he should have been with is a dragon (a good teacher but she shouts a lot). I explained to the head that everyone in the classroom, including the teacher would have a miserable year as they just spark off each other. The downside is that he will be moving away from his old classmates - he still considered it a good trade-off. So all-in-all, he will have enough on his plate this week without the exam as a complication!

Good suggestion berks_mum I will see how things go and thanks for the vote of confidence :D . I would be happy if he went through the NVR paper he bombed on just to see where he went wrong.

Well done to your twins Yamin - double stress; don't know how you managed!

Two weeks crazydaisy - that really is tough. Know what you mean about the conflict with attitudes - we can't do right for doing wrong. I wish I had thought about doing basic, easier work last week as I think that would have helped a lot. Good luck you your dd too.
RedVelvet
Posts: 546
Joined: Mon Oct 03, 2011 2:06 pm

Re: DS at end of tether poor thing!

Post by RedVelvet »

Hope school goes well for him today.


We talked about this last night, we've got one CGP paper we haven't done yet, but his scores have been great in the last few we've done, so we are really slowing down this week. Just going to do a few short maths questions and some NVR as these are his best areas.

Also lots of early nights and reading (he loves to read) and minimal screen time. He usually shares a room with his older brother, but this week DS1 has moved into the spare room (I'm hoping for a permanent move, but neither boy seems keen). A few favourite meals planned and multivitamins daily.

We've also talked about how the test will be on the day; what to do if someone's distracting him, he needs the loo, his pencil breaks etc.. Also a gentle reminder that no matter what happens he'll be fine, our nearest comp is great and that school work is just one part of his life.

Me, I'm stocking up on wine and chocolate.
berks_mum
Posts: 939
Joined: Sat Dec 28, 2013 4:52 pm

Re: DS at end of tether poor thing!

Post by berks_mum »

Wonder if there is some age effect in play ? Mine is also August born.
stroudydad
Posts: 2246
Joined: Sat Oct 08, 2011 2:25 pm

Re: DS at end of tether poor thing!

Post by stroudydad »

Neither of mine did anything in the week leading up to the exam. Let him have a great week.. But try to keep him occupied in a good way.
Stressed?Moi?
Posts: 1844
Joined: Mon Aug 01, 2011 11:28 am

Re: DS at end of tether poor thing!

Post by Stressed?Moi? »

Thanks stroudydad. I have told the school he won't be doing any homework this week, so he can settle himself back. Just need to think of something that would keep him out of mischief - there must be something!!!

berks_mum. There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that age effect does have a massive impact. I didn't want him to start school when he did but they insisted and it has done him no favours as he is incredibly immature up to his peers. When you consider that only 9 days ago he was still 9 years - similar to your son. The age weighting does help and he needs every part of it at the moment!
Post Reply