Is being obsessed with the 11 plus 'normal'?

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PettswoodFiona
Posts: 2134
Joined: Mon Mar 03, 2014 11:24 pm
Location: Petts Wood, Bromley, Kent

Is being obsessed with the 11 plus 'normal'?

Post by PettswoodFiona »

Ok, so I have been lurking on this forum for about a year, keen to gem up on other experiences. Help DD be prepared etc. she is bright, scored 145 on her standardised score for maths which apparently is the best you can get and equals the top 0.5%. But she can make simple mistakes and like all of us is fallable. She was bored in an all ability school and so we moved her at year 3 and the fees of an independent school are crippling but she is happier but still not fully stretched, grammar has become an obsession. Is it normal to have a spreadsheet of open days ticked off? To have all the paperwork diarised, the test dates and SIF forms with reminders on my 'phone, as well as on my darned spreadsheet. DD will be sitting tests in September this year. The spreadsheet lists past pass scores and maximum scores etc etc. DD likes tests, seriously. I work full time (in a busy job with about 45 hrs a week in the office let alone commuting times), However am I alone in finding it hard to see any other focus (other than DD of course!)? I used to read a book on the train into work but now find myself checking this website, other similar sites, reports of bulge classes etc etc. Can you share your degree of obsession with the 11+ whether minor, passing interest or major with a cherry on top just so I know if I am completely bonkers! Thank you!
Cherrytree20
Posts: 29
Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2015 3:18 pm

Re: Is being obsessed with the 11 plus 'normal'?

Post by Cherrytree20 »

Most definitely normal... Unless that makes me "abnormal"!!! Has been all consuming for the last 18 months. Good luck with it all :D
PettswoodFiona
Posts: 2134
Joined: Mon Mar 03, 2014 11:24 pm
Location: Petts Wood, Bromley, Kent

Re: Is being obsessed with the 11 plus 'normal'?

Post by PettswoodFiona »

Cherrytree20 wrote:Most definitely normal... Unless that makes me "abnormal"!!! Has been all consuming for the last 18 months. Good luck with it all :D
Thank you and good luck to you too!
MmeOgg
Posts: 153
Joined: Sun Oct 28, 2012 4:44 pm

Re: Is being obsessed with the 11 plus 'normal'?

Post by MmeOgg »

I managed to keep it all under control until the results came out.
Then I created a spreadsheet ticking down the number of days until allocations day; until DD leaves primary school; until she starts secondary. With added pie charts and important dates (like transition days). :oops: :roll:

I think it has been hanging over us for nearly two years now and I want the ****** thing consigned to history, done, dusted, finito. And not a lot is happening at the moment. I don't want to wish away Y6, but I do want her settled and happy in her new school.

Good luck.
mike1880
Posts: 2563
Joined: Sat Sep 27, 2008 10:51 pm

Re: Is being obsessed with the 11 plus 'normal'?

Post by mike1880 »

I think you're being a bit too chilled about it to be honest. Pass scores and maximum scores? I hope you've got trend lines, predictions and analysis of the last three years first preference oversubscription numbers vs. pass mark with that as well. And where's your spreadsheet aggregating five years data from the DofE schools attainment tables and FTSE top 100 league tables?

More seriously: not sure why you're thinking of GS if not stretched at indie. We have one at a good GS and one at a good indie, there's no question that the one at indie is very much more stretched (fortunately in a very subtle way - it's our stroppy one).
quasimodo
Posts: 3854
Joined: Sun Sep 07, 2014 2:47 pm

Re: Is being obsessed with the 11 plus 'normal'?

Post by quasimodo »

mike1880 wrote:I think you're being a bit too chilled about it to be honest. Pass scores and maximum scores? I hope you've got trend lines, predictions and analysis of the last three years first preference oversubscription numbers vs. pass mark with that as well. And where's your spreadsheet aggregating five years data from the DofE schools attainment tables and FTSE top 100 league tables?

More seriously: not sure why you're thinking of GS if not stretched at indie. We have one at a good GS and one at a good indie, there's no question that the one at indie is very much more stretched (fortunately in a very subtle way - it's our stroppy one).
Its a good job the first part are tongue and cheek comments, otherwise I am going to have to go to a shrink to discover where I have been going wrong!!!

Now if you're talking about becoming obsessed with this site then that could be a different question.Psychiatrist here I come.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.

Abraham Lincoln
doodles
Posts: 8300
Joined: Tue Oct 27, 2009 9:19 pm

Re: Is being obsessed with the 11 plus 'normal'?

Post by doodles »

The problem is that a lot of us can't bring ourselves to leave AFTER the 11 plus is all over.
Kata girl
Posts: 120
Joined: Thu Sep 18, 2014 10:58 pm

Re: Is being obsessed with the 11 plus 'normal'?

Post by Kata girl »

PettswoodFiona from most of the posts I've seen people do start off lurking it's really just to get a sense of what kind of contribution you could make.
Mike1880 made me smile !

For me while I was trying to get my daughter through the 12 + I was constantly on here reading new and old posts, searching for tips etc but I think the attraction is that not only is it informative but it is also responsive - you may get a quick one liner to an urgent query. The key attraction is probably that the information is shared in a quite entertaining way - there are very eloquent posters but equally some succinct and articulate contributions. You have a whole range of emotions and behaviours shared : excitement and nerves, joy, worry, hope, disappointment, frustration, anger and irritation not forgetting the mostly supportive posts but with the occasional blunt comments and retorts. More amusing if you are a bystander.

I work full time and my focus was condensed into 7 months from the time we visited a GS open evening and decided to enter out daughter for the 12+ until the day her results arrived. She had come from an outstanding primary out of county - we moved to Bucks for quality of life and close train link to London for me etc and then realised what a dire upper she was in. So we entered her for the 12 + CEM in Bucks. I spent free time helping DD with 11 + workbooks etc and then downtime for her was her iPad and FaceTime etc and for me going on here or wallpaper TV. She also had a 45 min session with a tutor once a week - maybe a maximum of 25 tutor sessions. She passed. When we had first moved to Bucks it was about a month before the 11+ and we entered her for it on the off chance but we had only gone through a couple of work books and no tutor, and despite her being a pretty bright cookie and an allegedly tutor proof test she failed dismally.

Anyway you probably are a bit bonkers FionaPettswood but in good company on here and I imagine it is only a temporary affliction and the spreadsheets obsession may subside as you source useful books for your DC to practice or help with DIY workbooks etc.

Good luck !
PettswoodFiona
Posts: 2134
Joined: Mon Mar 03, 2014 11:24 pm
Location: Petts Wood, Bromley, Kent

Re: Is being obsessed with the 11 plus 'normal'?

Post by PettswoodFiona »

Thanks guys and Mike yes we are considering Independents too. Her current school claims they are more robust at senior school and could offer her what she needs. It over subscribed, popular and the results exceptionally good - if I was looking as an outsider I'd be thinking it was ideal. However those in her class are not so 'robust' except for a few and all get an automatic pass through without test to senior. From juinior to senior they add two more classes so those coming in will all have had to pass the tough entrance tests. The school know our financial situation and have said they really want DD to stay (to extent I've met with the new head) at the school and have hinted at bursaries but when I ask for more details they don't come through. DD doesn't want to stay either as although she is in the 'enrichment' class still gets bored. However I think she is beginning to realise it isn't all so bad as at a very busy open day visitors were amazed at the facilities, the fact they had secondary trained science teachers in Y5, did a wide range of languages etc etc.

We have a second amazing indie which is a short commute away who have seen DD and also her school reports etc and we have submitted a bursary application. DD is in love with the school not least because it has school on a Saturday! We might get 50 to 75% of fees of £21k a year. But that has a tough entrance in January but DD has tried some past papers and did well. We don't want to cast the net too wide but then we don't want to put all our eggs in one basket either. We are in an area where there are just two super selective grammar schools, one for girls and one for boys, but also near enough to two other grammar areas.

We are fortunate to be in this situation I remind myself every day! Lucky to have a daughter who soaks up learning like a sponge, is keen and thoughtful and enjoys good health.

Thanks all - will be raising a glass of vino this evening to all bonkers parents everywhere!
Catseye
Posts: 1824
Joined: Wed Oct 29, 2014 6:03 pm
Location: Cheshire

Re: Is being obsessed with the 11 plus 'normal'?

Post by Catseye »

It's a never ending treadmill, after 11+ comes GCSEs ,A Levels, University choices , career advise.......I could go on and on, despite the occasional heated debate often resulting with the Mods intervening to a halt the bun fight one invariably comes away a little wiser , it is always good to challenged on one's preconceptions and strongly held beliefs.

I think there is a good mix of contributors here of intelligent posters who can fight a good fight and I respect all of them especially those that I vehemently disagree with because they make me stop, think and reevaluate things (TB :D ), I occasionally even fall out with those who generally share my outlook on things(g55) and of course the very sensible ones (unlike myself) who never get embroiled in any of this but just give sound advise like KB.
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