Everything else Independent

Independent Schools as an alternative to Grammar

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T.i.p.s.y

Everything else Independent

Post by T.i.p.s.y »

Hi Guys I thought we could start up a thread for those whose DC are at Independent schools to ask advice or grumble or post proud moments without fear of being criticised by other people who disagree with Independent schools. This way we can go off topic, and if people have specific issues then they can be posted on a new thread and answered by anyone who can offer practical advice in both sectors. So don't worry there will be no EvRvWvOv whatever from me on this thread! :roll: :lol:

First grumble:

For all who are first time buyers of inde schools do you feel that you always have to be on your best behaviour amongst teachers or are you pretty relaxed? Its especially difficult when your on a scholarship because you feel as if they are doing you a favour! Any advice/comments or similar thoughts?
Snowdrops
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Joined: Wed Nov 21, 2007 5:20 pm

Post by Snowdrops »

OOOO TWO inde threads at the same time - giving opinions, radical!!!!

Tipsy, at this moment in time I cannot offer you any advice, as my dd does not go to an independent school. That may, however, change in the future.

I can tell you I felt a little daunted going round on Open Day, after all we are only common or garden people who live in a terrace house and ALL THAT MONEY - gosh, I was nearly overwhelmed by it all!! But I expect with time one would get used to it - perhaps ................. maybe?
Image
zorro
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Joined: Mon Jan 21, 2008 10:27 am
Location: Barnet, Herts

Post by zorro »

As a "first-timer I DO feel I have to be on my best behaviour.
Like you Snowdrops we are an ordinary family in an average house in suburbia.
DS has made several new friends all of whom appear to come from affluent families. First time he went to one of the boy's houses he and the boy dared each other "to jump in the pool". Said pool was in a heated complex bigger than the entire ground floor of our house!
The boys don't seem to have a problem with their differing backgrounds - think it's me that does!
However with the credit crunch I think we should be grateful that we are not up to our necks in debt struggling to pay off an enormous mortgage (as some of these families may be)
I am sure when children have been at school a while the novelty will wear off and we'll all just be grateful that our children are getting a first class education.
AB
Posts: 887
Joined: Wed Oct 29, 2008 1:40 am

Re: Everything else Independent

Post by AB »

T.i.p.s.y wrote:Hi Guys I thought we could start up a thread for those whose DC are at Independent schools to ask advice or grumble or post proud moments without fear of being criticised by other people who disagree with Independent schools.
You know, Tipsy, I am not afraid of people who disagree with me. Is that really you talking or your almond liqueur hangover? I find it very bewildering that you always take this stance. Put that in your first sentence and you have already put a negative spin on this thread yourself.

I have tons to contribute as regards to your later question but I have to attend a concert now, so be back later.
KES Parent

Re: Everything else Independent

Post by KES Parent »

T.i.p.s.y wrote:For all who are first time buyers of inde schools do you feel that you always have to be on your best behaviour amongst teachers or are you pretty relaxed? Its especially difficult when your on a scholarship because you feel as if they are doing you a favour! Any advice/comments or similar thoughts?
I have found exactly the opposite. I did attend an independent school, but still felt when approaching public schools for my own children (even in order to pay full fees) that I wasn't quite up to the mark socially. As I have said on another thread I didn't even dare to approach Eton and Winchester for DS1, although with the benefit of hindsight I am as certain as it is possible to be that they would have fallen over themselves to have him. (I am sorry, that sounds very arrogant but it is true). However, I have taught in an independent school myself and have observed that the people who are most assertive about their DC's ability and of their right to massive bursaries etc are the ones who clearly have never set foot in an independent school before. They don't seem at all embarrassed by their own ignorance or grateful for what they are getting, in many cases free or very cheap. I know this sounds awful and of course it is a generalisation and there are plenty of exceptions in both camps, but this is my perception.

I will take cover now. :roll:

Edited to say I am not referring to anyone at all on this site, even the WUMs - the kind of people I am talking about are most unlikely to appear on here. Sorry if anyone has already been offended. :oops:
zorro
Posts: 2076
Joined: Mon Jan 21, 2008 10:27 am
Location: Barnet, Herts

Post by zorro »

What's a WUM?!!!
KES Parent

Post by KES Parent »

zorro wrote:What's a WUM?!!!
Wind up merchant - not that there are any on here, of course!
melinda
Posts: 226
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 8:40 pm
Location: surrey

Post by melinda »

My daughter went to an independent secondary and I had the similar thinking that all her friends would come from affluent backgrounds - but, guess what, they were normal families - weird eh?
We only spoke to the head on Leaving Day which was a bit odd after 7 years of paying fees, but I guess she had been a "good girl" and we had no reason to be called in!!
Do others have more contact with schools? It seems parent/teacher communication tends to fade quite a bit in secondary and you only meet at parent evenings.
Anyway, I think the days of private education being something only for the superrich are over - although with the present financial climate that may change!
My daughter had the nicest friends (still has, tho she has moved on).
T.i.p.s.y

Post by T.i.p.s.y »

Don't take cover KES as I have asked that this be an attack-free site! :)

Funny you should say that, when I went to JS day at Eton they said please be honest about your childs abilities because of the 100 who sat the exam last year over half had an IQ lower than 100. I also think that a free place shouldn't exist because if you have to pay something - even £50 for the whole year, its important to feel that you are investing in the education and sacrificing something for the privilige to go on a huge bursary.
Ed's mum
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Location: Warwickshire.

Post by Ed's mum »

I definitely feel that I need to be on my best behaviour!
Partly because I always do around academics.
Partly because we pay very little towards his education and I am aware just how much the school pays towards the fees.
Partly because of their accents (true!).
Partly because I feel so lucky, grateful, in awe of the surroundings.
Partly as I want my daughter to have a place in 2010.
Also because I am aware how rude some parents are to teachers (I wish I could tell you about one mother with me at my school at the moment!) and there is no need for it. (And if you think that awful parents don't have a slight knock on effect for how you FEEL about their precious darlings...)
Partly because in real life I am always polite!
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