11 Plus Exams Forum

Hi, I would really appreciate some advice.

We are looking at Slough, Langley and Herschel schools for DS. He, however, is not very keen to go to a grammar and would prefer to attend the local comp so that he will be with his mates.

We moved house about 12 months ago, and he had to change schools in Yr 5, which he found quite unsettling and although he is very friendly, he is quite shy. I am worried about how he would cope having to make friends yet again. I want him to try for a place at grammar; he is quite a bright boy, already on 5 for maths( at the end of yr 5), with maths being his strongest subject. He has been doing practice papers occassionally, achieving 90% and 86% on the last 2 nfer maths tests.

His older brother and sister have attended the local comp, our daughter having just achieved very good results in GCSE, but we have concerns over the standard of our sons education (he is now in yr9).

If anyone has been through a similar situation, or has any advice it would be great to hear from you.

SG

Oh Snurgelgrufflin - I love your user name....

personally I think you as a parent have to do what you think is best and if this involves a very heavy sell to you son of the opportunity to go to the grammar school then that is what you must do.

Would he be the only one from his school ? Even if he is many GS have children from a vast number of of schools an there well be only a few from each - they all tend to settle in and make new friends.
When DS went to GS there were 35 out of the 110 boys who were the ONLY child from their school.

edit: both didn't spell it right - off course it is snurglegrufflin

Hi.... welcome to the forum,

My son changed schools in Y5 (middle school system) and then moved to grammar in Y7. He didn't know anyone in his class or year group but he made friends and settled down.
A lot of children do find themselves at a grammar without any friends from previous schools so your son would not be the only one...... but you will find that even those who moved up with friends will change their friendship group in Y7.
If you think that the grammar school would be good for your son then try and visit the schools with him and see if their is one that he likes.
With Maths being your son's strongest subject then please note that only Slough Grammar has 'Maths' as a seperate paper in their 11+. Langley and Herschel only have NVR & VR.....although there are some maths based questions in the VR.

Hi

Thankyou for your replies.
Yes, I do agree that children change their friendship groups anyway when they go to secondary school. . . but try telling that to a stubborn 10 year old.
I think a few children from his current school will be sitting the 11+, but I don't know which school/s they are applying for.

We are going to go to the open evening tonight at Langley Grammar, and to Herschel open morning on Thursday. Unfortunately we missed Slough's open evening as it was earlier in the year, before I'd really considered the 11+. I may ring them though and see if we could go one morning to have a look.

I am hoping that DS will love at least one of the schools, which would make the whole process much easier!

I would like to just add that this website is a godsend. Thanks again

SG[/img]

Hi!

tell me about stubborn 10 year olds..... sometimes I think it is just a fear of the unknown.
Definitely try and see the school outside open days / evenings - I think sometimes these can be hectic and can put people off, whereas seeing a school working is much more likely to enthuse your DC

Good luck!

Even if you opt for a local comp your son will probably not be in the new form with his old mates.
Do what you think is best not the ten year old.

I totally agree with Tracy. They see the world in the terms of what a ten year old has experienced. You know best! At least get him to take the test (lure of a treat afterwards maybe) so at least you know you've given it a shot and then consider the options.

Hi snurglegrufflin,

Welcome to the forum.

I agree with all the above comments.
At the tender age of ten, I think children need a bit of parental direction. I was quite blunt, with mine, and reminded him that his best friend in reception or year 2 was no longer on the scene, and that friends come and go. I fully understand what you mean about a stubborn 10yr old. My one just started at grammar this term. He fortunately did know several boys but not all were in his class.
The other day coming home with a long face, I asked what was the matter. He said he had no friends. I explained that all the boys were new, all had no friends, all were looking for a friend but were too shy to make the first move. He had to have the courage to be the first to make that move; extend that hand of friendship. The following day, he said, he had made a couple of new friends, and that they were like 'lost puppies, and why was I always right about these things?' He's since rounded up a few more puppies and has made a few more friends, and is alot happier to boot.

Good luck with whatever you decide.




BW

My sisters eldest 2 (now 20 & 22) regret the decision they made to go to the local comp to be with their friends. As a result they persuaded their young brother not to make the same mistake and even coached him !

I drove passed a local school with my Y10 DS the other day and reminded him how, when he was 10 he really, really, really, REALLY wanted to go to that school and would entertain the thought of no other - principally because that was where several of his friends, including his then best friend were going. "Did I?" he said, "How strange".