Kes Interview
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Re: Kes Interview
Oh my gosh, JANEM your post actually bought tears to my eyes. Your poor son. It must be heartbreaking for you seeing him go through that. He has done SO well to be offered Solihull and sounds like you'll get KEFW too so at least he had a choice. It's such much pressure for a 10/11 year old to deal with. Huge hugs to you all.
Re: Kes Interview
dear JaneM
it is absolutely devastating to see the dcs genuinely upset and hurt and 'feel' like they have not lived up to it. If is more often than not, their perception (concern) of how their parents might perceive it or having failed the parents' expectations. what you see as an immediate reaction is the sense of panic but in a day, he will have had the vision of 'not all is gloom and doom', which is based on how you all react. You are obviously a very loving, encouraging and caring parent, so no doubt he will be fine soon. children are more resilient than we think they are.
I hope the forthcoming half term week will give him plenty of opportunities to get distracted from it all.
lots of love to you and littlejaneM
it is absolutely devastating to see the dcs genuinely upset and hurt and 'feel' like they have not lived up to it. If is more often than not, their perception (concern) of how their parents might perceive it or having failed the parents' expectations. what you see as an immediate reaction is the sense of panic but in a day, he will have had the vision of 'not all is gloom and doom', which is based on how you all react. You are obviously a very loving, encouraging and caring parent, so no doubt he will be fine soon. children are more resilient than we think they are.
I hope the forthcoming half term week will give him plenty of opportunities to get distracted from it all.
lots of love to you and littlejaneM
Re: Kes Interview
Hi All and thank you so much for your supportive replies.
Of course wildwest was right that children are much more resilient than we think. We had a bit of shaky start yesterday morning with an initial refusal to go to school, although in general he was much calmer. I think this refusal was motivated by an unwillingness to sit at the same maths table with the only other two boys who sat for KES and both got places. But they are both very nice lads so I was able to reassure and he went off to school OK. I wasn't back from work 'til 5.30 but neither was he as he'd unexpectedly decided to go home with a friend. And it got better. He seemed relaxed and happy when he came in, apparently the subject of KES hadn't come up at school and he was keen to hear about my conversation with Solihull admissions to arrange a taster day for him after half-term. I am so pleased that this is a possibility, it's a fantastic idea and shows not a little confidence on the part of the school I think. I see the beginnings of some real excitement about his new school. He has also agreed to go back and look at KEFW after the NAD so I take that to be a constructive move.
We've had no more tears and although he did come to bed with me last night (with hubby banished to DS's small bed!) I think it was more that he was feeling like a bit of indulgence rather than an absolute need. Solihull are also going to send over a load of bumph for him to look through over half term.
On the SEN side I talked to their SENCO yesterday and she was extremely reassuring, she had his exam paper in front of her and so could comment on what she saw. She came up with some strategies of how they would deal with DS and gave me some very useful advice. As well as testing every single new pupil for dyslexia/literacy difficulties - also done at KES -the SENCO and her assistant sit in on all year7 classes for the first 4 weeks or so to observe and hope to pick up any SENs or social difficulties among the children. With class sizes of only about 20 it is not too difficult to see those who are struggling. If children come in with a statement from PS or a diagnosis they are automatically flagged but so are children whose parents have rung in with concerns but no official diagnosis - like me. Depending on level of difficulty they will be closely monitored but not necessarily labelled from the beginning as, in her experience, some new pupils who have previously struggled do thrive once in the new school.
I've also managed to find a local boy who went to DS's school who is in Yr7 at Solihull so we will pop round to see them over half-term and hear all about it.
I was already feeling philosophical, as you know, but as DS is now also beginning to move on and look forward I feel that the weight is at last beginning to lift. I am so pleased that this is my last child and we will not have to go through this again!
Good luck to everyone for NAD next week and KEHS today, my thoughts are with you.
X
Of course wildwest was right that children are much more resilient than we think. We had a bit of shaky start yesterday morning with an initial refusal to go to school, although in general he was much calmer. I think this refusal was motivated by an unwillingness to sit at the same maths table with the only other two boys who sat for KES and both got places. But they are both very nice lads so I was able to reassure and he went off to school OK. I wasn't back from work 'til 5.30 but neither was he as he'd unexpectedly decided to go home with a friend. And it got better. He seemed relaxed and happy when he came in, apparently the subject of KES hadn't come up at school and he was keen to hear about my conversation with Solihull admissions to arrange a taster day for him after half-term. I am so pleased that this is a possibility, it's a fantastic idea and shows not a little confidence on the part of the school I think. I see the beginnings of some real excitement about his new school. He has also agreed to go back and look at KEFW after the NAD so I take that to be a constructive move.
We've had no more tears and although he did come to bed with me last night (with hubby banished to DS's small bed!) I think it was more that he was feeling like a bit of indulgence rather than an absolute need. Solihull are also going to send over a load of bumph for him to look through over half term.
On the SEN side I talked to their SENCO yesterday and she was extremely reassuring, she had his exam paper in front of her and so could comment on what she saw. She came up with some strategies of how they would deal with DS and gave me some very useful advice. As well as testing every single new pupil for dyslexia/literacy difficulties - also done at KES -the SENCO and her assistant sit in on all year7 classes for the first 4 weeks or so to observe and hope to pick up any SENs or social difficulties among the children. With class sizes of only about 20 it is not too difficult to see those who are struggling. If children come in with a statement from PS or a diagnosis they are automatically flagged but so are children whose parents have rung in with concerns but no official diagnosis - like me. Depending on level of difficulty they will be closely monitored but not necessarily labelled from the beginning as, in her experience, some new pupils who have previously struggled do thrive once in the new school.
I've also managed to find a local boy who went to DS's school who is in Yr7 at Solihull so we will pop round to see them over half-term and hear all about it.
I was already feeling philosophical, as you know, but as DS is now also beginning to move on and look forward I feel that the weight is at last beginning to lift. I am so pleased that this is my last child and we will not have to go through this again!
Good luck to everyone for NAD next week and KEHS today, my thoughts are with you.
X
Re: Kes Interview
Congratulations JaneM for your sons place at Solihull if he chooses to go there. It is a very good school and he has done well to get a place.
I wrote earlier on this blog how this was an anxious time for 2 of the boys in my youngest daughters class as neither had gained a high enough score for their parents to believe they had secured a grammar school place in the consortium exams. Well both the gifted musician|(grade 8 piano) amongst other things and the gifted linguist both have been offered places at KES. The 11 plus exams were not an exact judge of talent and ability.
The other boys who took the exam and who have their scores for the grammar school places all seem to be favouring their grammar schools the majority to QM boys and one to Camp hill boys.
Whatever has happened whether you have managed to secure your places or not as in life when one door closes another opens.
I wrote earlier on this blog how this was an anxious time for 2 of the boys in my youngest daughters class as neither had gained a high enough score for their parents to believe they had secured a grammar school place in the consortium exams. Well both the gifted musician|(grade 8 piano) amongst other things and the gifted linguist both have been offered places at KES. The 11 plus exams were not an exact judge of talent and ability.
The other boys who took the exam and who have their scores for the grammar school places all seem to be favouring their grammar schools the majority to QM boys and one to Camp hill boys.
Whatever has happened whether you have managed to secure your places or not as in life when one door closes another opens.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
Abraham Lincoln
Abraham Lincoln
Re: Kes Interview
You are so right. And once you get over the initial - and probably very short-lived -disappointment, it is actually very exciting
