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Difficult day tommorow

Posted: Sun Sep 27, 2015 10:06 pm
by Petitpois
All just a reminder that tommorow is going to be a difficult day for DD and DS's

If your lucky and great news received, then magnanimity is the order of the day.
If news is ambiguous or a clear no no, then remember how difficult it will be for these kids to sit and listen to other kids sharing their news. Kids being kids won't be as tactful or diplomatic.

If your dropping off kids, hold your head high whatever the result. I know 80% of parents in my school didn't try. Where that was a conscious choice fine, but many won't have tried because, they do not do trying.

Do not forget that extra big hug for DC after school and hold your head, up high because you worked hard whatever the result and deserve it

Re: Difficult day tommorow

Posted: Sun Sep 27, 2015 10:37 pm
by Stroller
Nice post. I'd suggest that there's no need for children (or parents) to talk about precise scores at all. "Very happy with my result" or "Did okay, waiting to see what happens" should be enough. If anyone with a lower score (half the entire exam cohort) really feels the need to reveal more, perhaps try "The exam day didn't go as well as I had hoped, ah well, I'm sure it will all work out in the end."

Arrive early /late. Move on, change the subject. Navel-gazing in public is rarely helpful.

"Why do you ask?" Or "Why would you ask that?" can be quite a neat response too.

It's not about hiding, it's about your own right not to be interrogated by busy bodies who would have no interest in talking to you another time.

Rugby might be a good topic / great way to shut the conversation down. :)

Re: Difficult day tommorow

Posted: Mon Sep 28, 2015 6:17 am
by MSD
Nice one PP! I don't think we have that problem as no one apart from close friends daughter applied for GS place. We have already shared the results with parents but kids have been told they both received the same score and did really well.

Re: Difficult day tommorow

Posted: Mon Sep 28, 2015 6:31 am
by quasimodo
This can be a major problem in some classes and schools.Particularly where a number are applying for Grammar schools as not only do the teachers need to know so can assist in directing the children and parents in the direction of other schools if not successful but they need to know if they have been doing the right teaching.At the same time they do not want children to be upset.

Re: Difficult day tommorow

Posted: Mon Sep 28, 2015 7:22 am
by Thumbsup
Bumped into other DC who sat the test over the weekend. All keen to know our specific score but not sharing there own! Looks like DP have trained their DCs very well!

I have told DC to simply say 'did ok', will know if get grammar school on allocations day. And to keep it at that!

I suppose this is a mini rehearsal of what allocations day must be like.

Not nice to quiz children though. All DC did well to sit the test. It's inevitable some did very well, some ok and some not so well.

Re: Difficult day tommorow

Posted: Mon Sep 28, 2015 7:57 am
by Petitpois
People will share scores or not, but Many DC will find it difficult to face their peers today regardless. One of our friends has said their DD is embarrassed to go in (she should not be).

In fact both DD's feared failure before the exam and I believe this was a major factor on the day, in both performances. Apart from being proud of them both, I really feel our DD will drop significantly from this achievement on the KE, whilst DD friend will do much much better.

Something for current Y5 to consider carefully with Walsall potentially not offering the free mock. We primarily did it because we wanted DD to go through the chaos and the nerves, ahead of KE.

In terms of parents I think I would have felt embarrassed, but still held my head high. Some "friends", made snide comments about DD probably ending up in the local comp regardless. Others deflected by saying the grammars were the wrong environment, or they were morally indefensible and we should support local schools school by sending DD there, (whilst secretly beavering away under the radar themselves as far as they could with their 11 plus prep).

I don't think I have seen such collective immaturity as I have experienced over the last two years, so i'll be getting more cup cakes in for this PM as the anti dote to it all!!

Re: Difficult day tommorow

Posted: Mon Sep 28, 2015 9:57 am
by Midlandsmom
I'm clearly losing my mind! I saw this thread and thought omg, KE results are coming out early! Took me ages to click on to what it was actually about! Then got a letter postmarked KE schools today and actually froze picking it up off the mat!!! Clearly not results, it's a letter about applying for the independent KE school. I need to cleanse my brain! Blaming a stinking cold for not thinking straight :-/

Re: Difficult day tommorow

Posted: Mon Sep 28, 2015 10:43 am
by Petitpois
Should we be getting on to KEHS now. Whats the closing date for the test

Re: Difficult day tommorow

Posted: Mon Sep 28, 2015 11:11 am
by Midlandsmom
I haven't contacted KES at all, I assume they've written to all those whose boys registered for the KE 11+, not sure if the girls school will do the same? Letter says last date for boys applications is 26 Nov, test is 9 Jan. Again, not sure if it's the same for girls, but likely to be similar dates?

Re: Difficult day tommorow

Posted: Mon Sep 28, 2015 1:31 pm
by Midlandsmom
Thumbsup wrote:
Not nice to quiz children though. All DC did well to sit the test. It's inevitable some did very well, some ok and some not so well.
I really do agree, but I said (without engaging brain) at the weekend to my child, "I wonder how **** (friend in class at school) did in the QM test"
My son replied "I don't mum, I don't want to know his score and I don't want him to know mine. It really doesn't matter to either of us what the other got."

I felt very ashamed of myself for my throwaway musing, but very proud of my sensible child's reaction and assured him that he was absolutely correct, and that mum was really rather stupid sometimes!