What should you take into consideration?

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bluejay
Posts: 359
Joined: Mon Nov 03, 2014 3:28 pm

What should you take into consideration?

Post by bluejay »

Apart from the obvious factors such as school results, their ethos and so on,,,,

What would parents who already have children at grammar / indies make others aware of, that maybe they didn't really realise would impact them and their child as much as it is!

Firstly my older son goes to an Independent school, it is single sex and at the time it didn't really bother him but i think it has made a huge difference to him in regards to confidence around girls.

Secondly the travelling is an hour there and an hour back. We do drop him off around our work commitments but traffic is hectic so the metro / bus/ train is actually faster.
If you are going to rely on family and friends - are they always going to be there to do it for you? 5 years of commitment - a lot can change.

There is always a million and one activities the DC attend so the dark winter nights are not at all easy for any of us. He also gets a great deal of homework so that needs to be factored in.

If you have heavily tutored your DC
(only you know that - and you may be telling everyone your DC did hardly any preparation! I personally know so MANY parents who like to throw that in when they are boasting about their DC score )
OR your child has really worked their @** off are they going to be able to keep up.

At least 2 of my DS good friends have left, not entirely sure why but DS said they were unhappy as were really struggling with work load and the travelling - both of these children lived in Wolverhampton and trekking to Birmingham every day took its toll.
Schools do care a great deal about their stats and will come down on you like a ton of bricks if your DC is not where they feel they should be academically.

Please share your experiences as sometimes us parents look through rose tinted specs and don't realise how hard it actually is for all of us.

Don't get me wrong he loves the school and we have no issues whatsoever but we did underestimate a lot of things when we made our decision.
Petitpois
Posts: 1440
Joined: Thu Jul 02, 2015 7:44 am

Re: What should you take into consideration?

Post by Petitpois »

Get them over the line and they will floursh fine!!!!!
Petitpois
Posts: 1440
Joined: Thu Jul 02, 2015 7:44 am

Re: What should you take into consideration?

Post by Petitpois »

Blue when you said single sex school affected your DS confidence. Do you mean mixed school is better or worse.

We know some people are more for single sex. Some cultural group have a distinct preference, for various reasons. My assumption without thinking it through is girls school is best, but I never thought it could or would affect confidence around opposite sex.

Do you think this is a major factor to consider before deciding. All the possible mixeds we have are drivel apart from KEFW and the cut is pretty high for that
Dadybear
Posts: 73
Joined: Mon Sep 21, 2015 1:43 pm

Re: What should you take into consideration?

Post by Dadybear »

Travelling time is the main one sometimes after school clubs finish at 5.30 so with traffic, if you live in Wolverhampton you mite not get back for at least 6.30. Then they clean up and dinner that doesn't leave them much time to do their homework. I chose the grammar closest to our home even thou my child could have got into ke five ways. The round trip would have taken over 2 hours per day that's their play time gone. Remember any grammar is a good grammar! They need life away from education as well!!!
bluejay
Posts: 359
Joined: Mon Nov 03, 2014 3:28 pm

Re: What should you take into consideration?

Post by bluejay »

Petitpois wrote:Blue when you said single sex school affected your DS confidence. Do you mean mixed school is better or worse.

We know some people are more for single sex. Some cultural group have a distinct preference, for various reasons. My assumption without thinking it through is girls school is best, but I never thought it could or would affect confidence around opposite sex.

Do you think this is a major factor to consider before deciding. All the possible mixers we have are drivel apart from KEFW and the cut is pretty high for that
I feel DS being around boys all day 5 days a week has made him quite shy and reserved around girls.
I would prefer DS2 to go to a mixed school and he has said he would prefer that also. However he changes his mind constantly so we will see what happens. If he has scored well enough for Five Ways that will definitely be an option to consider with it being mixed. I do know boys are still a majority though.

Being Asian, back in the day my parents would have loved us being separated from the boys but I definitely am glad we went to a mixed school.

Girls were right ***ches in our school, and a school full of them would have been horrendous.

The mixed versus single sex school is something to definitely consider.

The only way we have got around the travelling issue is that we have a great deal of family near the school so my DS will stay over with family a couple of days a week.

Crossed post with Dadybear - Travelling is definitely something to consider!
bluejay
Posts: 359
Joined: Mon Nov 03, 2014 3:28 pm

Re: What should you take into consideration?

Post by bluejay »

Remember any grammar is a good grammar! They need life away from education as well!!!
You are right Dadybear. It can be an extremely long day for the DC.
mombrum
Posts: 19
Joined: Sun Mar 15, 2015 4:04 pm

Re: What should you take into consideration?

Post by mombrum »

My son is in year 7 and we live a 10 minute drive from his school (KEFW). Some days he likes to go on the bus with his friends which means a much earlier start, other days I give him a lift. On the days when he goes on the bus he is shattered by the end of the day and finds it difficult to be motivated if he has homework. When I take him he is so much better in the evening and happily does his homework and any out of school activities which he may have. I really do think the journey has to be considered if you don't want your child to have a miserable few years.
Petitpois
Posts: 1440
Joined: Thu Jul 02, 2015 7:44 am

Re: What should you take into consideration?

Post by Petitpois »

Which could be good news for many nearer the Walsall and WGHS school who have borderline scores.

Of the 13 children I know of at my DD's school or who attending the other local primaries (i.e. would face the same commute)

2 have scored <285 and realistically would not have a chance of either QMHS or WGHS

1 scored slightly < 310 but was a boy anyway

The other 10 girls have all scored in the range 345 to 390, with most clustered around the 355+ mark. That's potentially quite high numbers of kids dropping out of the race, because of the commute. The dynamics for that only play out after we know where we stand with KE. Some of the stronger girls in the school didn't bother taking Walsall, but are in the KE one.

How many will end up saying you know what I'll let my place go, and take my chances with the mediocre or in some cases challenged local comp, because someone else will have a better time of it, with a much lower commute. Who knows, but nothings ever straightforward.
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