What would you do in our situation?

Eleven Plus (11+) in Birmingham, Walsall, Wolverhampton and Wrekin

Moderators: Section Moderators, Forum Moderators

11 Plus Platform - Online Practice Makes Perfect - Try Now
Happy dad
Posts: 482
Joined: Thu Oct 18, 2012 10:10 am

Re: What would you do in our situation?

Post by Happy dad »

um wrote:It is 17 ...ds1 is applying to sit the theory test soon. Although the insurance is so high I wonder if using taxis to get around would be cheaper :shock:
You can drive a quardicycle ( :?: ) at 16 which can be a very small car but has some restrictions, such as limit of 28mph. And the cost is ridiculous. So though possible, better to wait until 17.
Faith4
Posts: 28
Joined: Tue Sep 29, 2015 1:49 pm

Re: What would you do in our situation?

Post by Faith4 »

MSD wrote:We are in a bit of dilemma. My eldest is currently in Year 9, attending KEFW. We very much hope (results pending but did well in QM) that our little one will join elder brother at the same school in September next year.

My son's daily commute on Green Bus currently can be in excess of 3 and half hours both ways. He leaves home around 6:55am and gets back at 5:20pm - almost being in full time work or even worse :(

We considered relocating close to the school, but then postponed it just to see how the little one gets on. At that time we were quite clear in our mind that we had no other option but to relocate if the little master ends up at the same school. However, discussing it with the boys now, my eldest is quite happy with his commute and loves it, and the little one is insistent that we will be completely unfair to him if we didn't provide him with the opportunity to enjoy the same lovely bus ride as his brother :roll:

We self-built our home, worked really hard on it and now emotionally attached to it, and, quite frankly, can't see us buying another place. If we did however sell it, I see us making a big financial loss and probably buying half the size home in Harborne or Edgbaston for the same amount of money.

But at the same time, I feel as parents we are being selfish and putting our kids through this treacherous journey, 5 days a week, for the next 7 years. To be honest so far we have not noticed any impact on his studies due to excessive journey, but I am also aware that these are early days, and as he moves on to do GCSE and A levels it will become more of an issue.

Our work really isn't an issue, if we relocate. It will probably be lot easier for both of us and less commute.

I know a lot parents on this forum who have been through the same process? Can excessive hours of commute take a serious toll on their studies? What would you recommend in our situation?
Hello MSD:- After reading your post I felt your dilemma. If I were in your position I would just relocate. But if you feel you would be making a loss then why don't you drop and pick the boys up from school? I don't know what your situation is with work and timing. I was just thinking that, like you said, later on homework and essays and exams will be much more for your sons to deal with. If they have to travel it may start to affect there studies. I don't want to intrude in any way. I just feel as a parent what you must be going through and I strongly believe you should lessen the travel for them in what way you can. Also, travelling long distance as a child is getting older I believe they can start to do as they please and may start to not tell you everything they are up to. I might sound like a panic parent but I think that's what I am. :shock: Sorry for any intrusion.

I am sure you will do only the best for your sons. :D
Faith4
Posts: 28
Joined: Tue Sep 29, 2015 1:49 pm

Re: What would you do in our situation?

Post by Faith4 »

Petitpois wrote:But it is a whole lot better a dilemma, than not having the choice for a solid grammar, as opposed to a dive comp, in a failing LEA. Many many hard working parents will have had their hopes smashed over the last week or will have them pinned to the KE results next week.

To boot, for some of the very unlucky, they then will face further disappointment of not getting their first choice comp /academy. This journey is a horrible when you add up all the stress and heartache, and that's how it feels, when the outcome means you have a choice.

I hope this post helps you decide, if only by highlighting the + positives of your situation and where you are now. You are one of the lucky winners, with a choice of prizes, all you do have to decide which is the best prize for you and your family!
PP:- I understand you think MSD as being lucky for having a very good choice Grammar school but I have to say that daily travelling as much as he has mentioned will certainly be difficult long term when it comes to the work load increasing. It is good that you see the positive side but distance to and from school can become a problem if you don't choose wisely. You might be thinking that they are in the best school but what is happening when they are travelling they might not share with you and is it always safe? If it is just 20-25 minutes to an from they can be ok but anymore is too much in my view.
Faith4
Posts: 28
Joined: Tue Sep 29, 2015 1:49 pm

Re: What would you do in our situation?

Post by Faith4 »

MSD wrote:
mombrum wrote:From reading your post briefly I would just like to add that we live in Harborne and have done for many years. It is expensive but we love it and you can always sell up and leave when the kids are older as the houses hold their value. My son has just started at KEFW and it is so convenient with 2 Green buses plus lots of public transport to choose from, I also have the option of taking him myself which takes 10 minutes. Another plus is that there are lots of KEFWs kids who live in the area, I would say 20 + that I know of myself. Also we have youth clubs, scouts and endless other activities all within walking distance. My son is in the house by 4.10 every day which gives him lots of time outside of school. Best of luck with your decision.
Thanks mombrum! It will be a dream come true to be back at 4:10pm for us. That will save an hour and half one way, and 3 hours both ways, every day. That's 15 hours a week, nearly 600 hours a year, and 4,200 hours over 7 years. And that too for two boys :(

Never really thought of it like that, but looking at those figures we will have to seriously start thinking about our next move :)
I think that would be a very wise decision MSD. I am sure you will find a nice house as well. Best of luck.
MSD
Posts: 1731
Joined: Tue Dec 16, 2008 6:08 pm

Re: What would you do in our situation?

Post by MSD »

Faith4 wrote:
MSD wrote:We are in a bit of dilemma. My eldest is currently in Year 9, attending KEFW. We very much hope (results pending but did well in QM) that our little one will join elder brother at the same school in September next year.

My son's daily commute on Green Bus currently can be in excess of 3 and half hours both ways. He leaves home around 6:55am and gets back at 5:20pm - almost being in full time work or even worse :(

We considered relocating close to the school, but then postponed it just to see how the little one gets on. At that time we were quite clear in our mind that we had no other option but to relocate if the little master ends up at the same school. However, discussing it with the boys now, my eldest is quite happy with his commute and loves it, and the little one is insistent that we will be completely unfair to him if we didn't provide him with the opportunity to enjoy the same lovely bus ride as his brother :roll:

We self-built our home, worked really hard on it and now emotionally attached to it, and, quite frankly, can't see us buying another place. If we did however sell it, I see us making a big financial loss and probably buying half the size home in Harborne or Edgbaston for the same amount of money.

But at the same time, I feel as parents we are being selfish and putting our kids through this treacherous journey, 5 days a week, for the next 7 years. To be honest so far we have not noticed any impact on his studies due to excessive journey, but I am also aware that these are early days, and as he moves on to do GCSE and A levels it will become more of an issue.

Our work really isn't an issue, if we relocate. It will probably be lot easier for both of us and less commute.

I know a lot parents on this forum who have been through the same process? Can excessive hours of commute take a serious toll on their studies? What would you recommend in our situation?
Hello MSD:- After reading your post I felt your dilemma. If I were in your position I would just relocate. But if you feel you would be making a loss then why don't you drop and pick the boys up from school? I don't know what your situation is with work and timing. I was just thinking that, like you said, later on homework and essays and exams will be much more for your sons to deal with. If they have to travel it may start to affect there studies. I don't want to intrude in any way. I just feel as a parent what you must be going through and I strongly believe you should lessen the travel for them in what way you can. Also, travelling long distance as a child is getting older I believe they can start to do as they please and may start to not tell you everything they are up to. I might sound like a panic parent but I think that's what I am. :shock: Sorry for any intrusion.

I am sure you will do only the best for your sons. :D
Thank you for taking the time to respond and really appreciate it. I know exactly where you are coming from - lots to consider in the next 6 months :(
Amarstone
Posts: 124
Joined: Tue Oct 16, 2012 1:29 pm

Re: What would you do in our situation

Post by Amarstone »

I would definitely move. A couple of years ago, I changed jobs and now work 8 minutes from home. Previously, it took me an hour to get to work. Now, I have a round trip of 16 minutes instead of 2 hrs and it has transformed my life.
Faith4
Posts: 28
Joined: Tue Sep 29, 2015 1:49 pm

Re: What would you do in our situation?

Post by Faith4 »

MSD wrote:
Faith4 wrote:
MSD wrote:We are in a bit of dilemma. My eldest is currently in Year 9, attending KEFW. We very much hope (results pending but did well in QM) that our little one will join elder brother at the same school in September next year.

My son's daily commute on Green Bus currently can be in excess of 3 and half hours both ways. He leaves home around 6:55am and gets back at 5:20pm - almost being in full time work or even worse :(

We considered relocating close to the school, but then postponed it just to see how the little one gets on. At that time we were quite clear in our mind that we had no other option but to relocate if the little master ends up at the same school. However, discussing it with the boys now, my eldest is quite happy with his commute and loves it, and the little one is insistent that we will be completely unfair to him if we didn't provide him with the opportunity to enjoy the same lovely bus ride as his brother :roll:

We self-built our home, worked really hard on it and now emotionally attached to it, and, quite frankly, can't see us buying another place. If we did however sell it, I see us making a big financial loss and probably buying half the size home in Harborne or Edgbaston for the same amount of money.

But at the same time, I feel as parents we are being selfish and putting our kids through this treacherous journey, 5 days a week, for the next 7 years. To be honest so far we have not noticed any impact on his studies due to excessive journey, but I am also aware that these are early days, and as he moves on to do GCSE and A levels it will become more of an issue.

Our work really isn't an issue, if we relocate. It will probably be lot easier for both of us and less commute.

I know a lot parents on this forum who have been through the same process? Can excessive hours of commute take a serious toll on their studies? What would you recommend in our situation?
Hello MSD:- After reading your post I felt your dilemma. If I were in your position I would just relocate. But if you feel you would be making a loss then why don't you drop and pick the boys up from school? I don't know what your situation is with work and timing. I was just thinking that, like you said, later on homework and essays and exams will be much more for your sons to deal with. If they have to travel it may start to affect there studies. I don't want to intrude in any way. I just feel as a parent what you must be going through and I strongly believe you should lessen the travel for them in what way you can. Also, travelling long distance as a child is getting older I believe they can start to do as they please and may start to not tell you everything they are up to. I might sound like a panic parent but I think that's what I am. :shock: Sorry for any intrusion.

I am sure you will do only the best for your sons. :D
Thank you for taking the time to respond and really appreciate it. I know exactly where you are coming from - lots to consider in the next 6 months :(
Your most welcome. Best wishes to you and your family. :D
MSD
Posts: 1731
Joined: Tue Dec 16, 2008 6:08 pm

Re: What would you do in our situation

Post by MSD »

Amarstone wrote:I would definitely move. A couple of years ago, I changed jobs and now work 8 minutes from home. Previously, it took me an hour to get to work. Now, I have a round trip of 16 minutes instead of 2 hrs and it has transformed my life.
Thanks Amarstone! It can imagine the difference it will make. We will most definitely be looking into it.
Bob1892
Posts: 1186
Joined: Sat Sep 14, 2013 10:14 am

Re: What would you do in our situation?

Post by Bob1892 »

I think I've already given my view to you MSD. Logistics is everything I think with kids- all the KE schools are much of a muchness - the closest school should be the primary factor I believe.
Horses for courses I suppose.
Bob
MSD
Posts: 1731
Joined: Tue Dec 16, 2008 6:08 pm

Re: What would you do in our situation?

Post by MSD »

Hear, hear Bob!

The only reason I was inclined that way was because of the over shadowing factor. Just want little one to be independent and find his own way. But I completely take your point.
Post Reply
11 Plus Platform - Online Practice Makes Perfect - Try Now