Pastoral care at Gloucestershire Grammars?

[Octsmum]

Hi

We're considering the various grammar schools for our DD. We would welcome thoughts on the pastoral care received from parents at those schools. Thank you.

[Amber]

Hi Octsmum. I am replying as no one else has and I like it when parents prioritise pastoral care.

I have 2 sons and did have a DD at a GS but I wouldn't post openly about any negative pastoral experiences as I think it would be wrong to be openly critical of a school. The reason I am telling you that is because if you ask for opinions like this, you will probably only find the positive ones posted. For example I could tell you how marvellous the pastoral care at STRS is (it is!) which won't help your daughter sadly; but if I was unhappy with something I wouldn't post it. Even if I PMed you I would be wary as my experience may not be typical and if I said there was one school I would not have sent my daughter to on account of what I saw of its pastoral care (there is) then another parent could say their daughter had had the best care possible.

I have experience of all the Gloucestershire grammars, as a parent (recently) and a teacher (longer ago), and there are certainly a couple which I believe are better than others in that regard. I suggest that the best way to gauge, instead of asking on here where you will get the various GS supporters' clubs out to defend their corner, is when you visit the schools to have a few questions to ask staff and pupils about bullying, eating disorders, mental health etc, and watch very carefully how they react. Anyone who says 'we don't have bullying here' is lying so strike them off! Ask how they would deal with bullying and see if it accords with your own view. Ask what provision they have in place to deal with mental health issues, with girls being left out of social groups (happens a lot), with social media issues. I suggest these as examples, as the attitudes you see will give you a clue as to the compassion provided. I would particularly go with the eating disorder/mental health ones as these will test staff more than the social media/bullying questions and you may get a better idea.

Sorry, that is the best I can do.

[Guest55]

Tours in the school day tell you a lot and I totally agree with the questions Amber suggests.

Look out for the way the students are spoken to, the type of things on noticeboards, the state of the toilets, behaviour in corridors, ..

[Octsmum]

Thank you, really helpful advice. We only have one child so trying to think ahead as to what we might encounter in those teenage years.

[Stressed?Moi?]

Not all of us will be overwhelmingly positive (some of us far from it), but Amber's advice is sound. It is probably something that is best left off an open forum and visit schools instead. One very basic question to ask yourself/your dd, is whether single sex education would suit her? Regardless of the quality of teaching, etc, would she actually be happy in a school surrounded only by girls? It isn't for everyone. Good luck for the future.

[DC17C]

I am certainly happy with the pastoral care at Ribston and Crypt. The schools have been very supportive of my children through some difficult times with family ill health and dealing with a bit of health crisis for one of my children. I ve have had good support from the SEN team at Crypt and found all the staff approachable and understanding. One thing I am very glad about is that the schools are not that far from our home so when there have been problems that have meant a child needs collecting it is not usually too much of a hassle.

[Watermelon8]

I have been very happy with the pastoral care at Denmark & Crypt, both caring schools

[Stroller]

Adding to what's above, it's also useful to keep bias in mind. Some people scaremonger in an attempt to reduce the competition, (I always think of the charming young lady in DD's year 6 who announced the day before the exam that anybody who didn't have a tutor didn't have a chance.) Others give positive answers without hard / recent experience.

We visited every school on our common application form multiple times, many others too as we drew up the shortlist. We also spoke with teachers, parents and older pupils and observed how the pupils interacted with each other. IMO there's no substitute for real life leg work in shaping your opinion. Good luck.

[clarcats]

Just be aware that things can change pretty quickly too, and be aware of your child and changes in their work and attitude at school etc.

I have found that Year 7 was fine, but Year 8 hasn't been from my daughter's point of view and I am not overly happy with the way things have been handled. I think people get too much of an idea that grammar schools are the best and the best for their children etc when beneath the surface they may not be

[Amber]

I am not sure about the idea of scaremongering to reduce the competition tbh - that would be really mean and horrid and for myself there is nothing of that as mine are all either at the top end of school or out of it.

I think gauging pastoral care is so hard as many parents won't ever have had to test it out (lucky them!) so will default to saying it is good. Ideally you need to speak to parents of children who have been bullied or had other pastoral issues at school. I have a lot of experience of bullying, sadly, so can speak with confidence about two GSs as a parent. One is brilliant and the other is not. And how a school handles it is entirely critical - you can either have a child who bounces back and becomes confident and secure, or you can have one who is damaged by it for a very long time. So it does matter a lot.

It is so hard to know ahead of time, though for me the signs were there in both cases. Ask lots of questions is all I can say, and look really carefully at the body language of those answering you. If you do have a child who is sensitive or 'different' in any way, then this matters more than any academic standing of the school or anything else at all, to be honest, so it is important to get it right.