Parmiters or Habs Boys?

[Pushy Dad]

Tense - I wouldn't use the word 'relieved'. I mean, despite what my posts may seem to suggest, I am not saying that we had a lucky escape and that Parmiters did us a favour by not allocating us a place. Plus I am not relieved that I have to pay private fees for him and his twin sister for the next 7 years

If my kids had been allocated Parmiters and there was no offer from Habs or the High School then I would have been happy with Parmiters. The fact that I prefer Habs and SAHSG because it will challenge them more, musically and academically, does not detract from the fact that Parmiters is a good school that does very well considering that it is not 100% selective like the private schools.

On a lighter note, being state primary school kids they have absolutely no experience of sports like tennis and lacrosse. We don't want our kids to be the ones no one wants on their team come September so guess what we'll be doing with them during the summer? Poor dears. They spent last summer being tutored for the 11+. They thought that now they were in, they could coast until the academic slog begins in September.

[ttmum]

.................100% selective like the private schools.

Please note that even in the real world not all private schools are academically selective... there are 1 or 2% academically challenged kids at private schools.

Also some private schools have set a pass rate of 55 - 65% to gain entry...unlike the state partially selective schools in Herts whereby they take the best scores not necessarily within the average pass rate eg standardised scoring

[TubbyCakes]

To the OP, I would guess that when you originally asked your question that you had no expectation of the diverse set of sometimes heated responses you would receive.

Back to your original question.

At the end of the day you can only do that which is best for YOUR child. I would suggest that now that you have firm offers from both schools, go back to each of them and discuss your child needs and how they will contribute to their development. You may even choose to explain that you have another offer from another school. A good school should be receptive to the dilemma you face and should be able to explain the difference they can make for your child. Both schools will not be short of other children that can be offered the place that you reject.

The problem when looking at schools at the admission stage is that everyone talks in generalities. Now that the process is over and your down to you're final two, be more specific about what you want. Yes I appreciate that it is the best, but what is your best, what does your child need. Someone suggested waiting outside to see how the pupils behave. Excellent idea. Pretend to be lost and ask some pupils for directions, how do they respond, their attitude. What is your gut feel telling you?

League tables are all well and good but do the schools share your values. One of the biggest influences on your child is going to be their school peers.

Finances may or may not come into the equation, but if at all possible, don't let that be the driving force of the direction that you choose to go in but what is right for your child.

Good luck.

[pabrighton0]

Someone suggested waiting outside to see how the pupils behave. Excellent idea. Pretend to be lost and ask some pupils for directions, how do they respond, their attitude. What is your gut feel telling you?

I wonder if anyone could share the results of this type of experiment? I suppose a lot more meaningful than how smartly they wear their uniforms!

League tables are all well and good but do the schools share your values. One of the biggest influences on your child is going to be their school peers.

Absolutely. Values and influences of peers. And it's good to have a bit of diversity, so they can be really prepared for real life, not growing in a bubble with similarly minded kids.