My daughter's scores seem similar to your's with VR 135 NVR 138 and Maths 104. Daughter seems to have similar attitude to your's too. Not because of friends going to same school, just because she appreciates that she did her best but it wasn't quite enough this time.
I have never drummed it into her that it is "grammar or nothing". It seems that many parents on here think that is the case. She will excel at whatever school she goes to.....if she is happy!
Your posts are positive, despite your child 'failing.'
A lot of parents here don't seem able to grasp that many of our secondary schools have an 'all-ability' intake with classes where children of 'like ability' are taught. And extensive research by several experts has proved that those children in the top streams of all ability schools do equally as well (and is some cases, better) than those in grammars.
I know that it's easy for me to say this as I didn't have a child going through this stressful time this year myself (although I've had my time, in the past,) but I think this fact is something that disappointed parents need to hold onto. Grammar school is not the 'be all and end all' despite the way the myth is perpetuated. Those parents of very bright children who do not put their child through the stress of the 11+ and would rather they went to a comprehensive know what they are doing.
Keep your spirits up!