Are these feelings normal.... Tips Please....

[countrymum]

Hi. DD sitting exam in September for AGGS, she is chilling along ( ocassional ups and downs of not wanting to knuckle down but mostly getting into the spirit ) Though I am becoming very *stressy* about it all. Hand on heart I would love her to get in, but truly know there is so much more to life than getting into *a* particular school, that she is capable, and in all probability shall be just fine wherever she goes. Though I really think she would flourish at that school. Anyway any tips on coping strategies for me from you experienced ones that have been through this would be most helpful. I try not to show my nerves to her and I really don't want her to feel she is letting anyone ( including herself ) down if she doesn't pass. Wondering if these nervous feelings are normal from the parent.

[Muggle]

These feelings are 100% normal (well certainly for me!). All I can say, is try to hide them from your child and then come on here and vent if needed.

[It'sme!]

As above, but add wine. Lots. Hopefully you will be one of the lucky few who gets a nice smooth ride

I have been completely honest with my daughter all the way through. Told her that lots of very bright children don't pass but go on to do amazing things. I made a point of telling her I know she has an amazing attitude to her work (she really does) and will do well wherever she goes and that whichever school gets her will be a very lucky school. I just really tried to build her self confidence up.

What I did find useful was speaking to the admissions team at her local high school and asking how they encourage their high achievers. It was really reassuring.

[TIDDLYMUM]

I was exactly the same.The whole process consumed me for months before and until allocation day ( we were way out of area so couldn't be sure of a place).

I also coped with (lots of) wine and sharing my worry with the other few mums who were going through the same.

Then when he was allocated... I worried about him going to the school on his own and having no friends.....
Gladly now he is in Y8 I am having a few months off worrying.....till I start worrying about picking options..... then GCSES.......

Arrrrrrgggghhh!

CM feel free to come on here and share your worries.....

[Reading Mum]

If DD spent anything like the amount of time stressing and prepping for this exam as I have she would be a shoe-in. Sadly that is not the case so the stress continues.

[pheasantchick]

Perfectly normal, I afraid.

TIPS:
Tip 1) Wine
Tip 2) Chocolate
Tip 3) Spend an unhealthy amount of time on this website

[neveragain*]

This is where this forum comes into its own! Instead of boring my husband and freaking out my friends, I came onto this forum and shared my journey and was supported and then reciprocated! Certainly a life saver! Keep the stress under wraps from DC and come and share it with us! Even those of us whose DC are now through 11 plus **** are here to help and support every step of the way! My DH was really ill through my youngest sons 11 plus prep and it saved my sanity being able to share my concerns etc which did become all encompassing! Deep breath, and remember we're only a post away!

[countrymum]

Awwww thanks so much for your feedback, and super advice from all of you. I was starting to think I was a bit strange for getting myself worked up

If it is alright with you I shall pop on here and you can hold my hand I think also it has kind of hit home with me how very hard this exam is ( even for the bright ones imo ) and so am just trying to find a balance of not getting too stressed about how much I want her to get in, yet also to encourage her to put the work in and do the very best she can. I really think confidence plays a very big part in this process and more than anything I want her to have the confidence to feel she has as good a chance as any. ( I do wonder though that coming from a little primary she is probably at a disadvantage to those who have been *geared* to get in at their independent schools ) Maybe it is me who needs the confidence too, I am already thinking of things to say if she doesn't pass/get in. I actually want to enjoy this process ha ha. She I believe is the only one in her class taking it, so not really many mums can share with and maybe understand the feelings but thanks so much for letting me waffle on here. Really helps and can't believe when I first posted on here it all felt light years away and now here we are, with just 88 days to go!!

I shall get stocked up in the wine department too

[countrymum]

Oh dear having one of those *is it all worth it days --- feeling very emotional. All the if's buts, tensions on results day, then the lead up to march 1st etc etc....

Is it too early for wine