Have people generally just supported their kids during their standard (presumably, usually state school) primary years, making sure that what they've learned in the classroom is really embedded in their minds and helped with areas they've struggled with?
In my case yes.
Or have people tried to make sure their kids are technically ahead of their year group to make sure it wasn't all a great rush at the end (I understand the 11+ covers the last 2 terms of year 6, though DC won't have covered those topics yet).
Personally I would not have considered the 11+ unless my DC were well ahead of their year group anyway.
I heard from a friend of a friend, who is a tutor, that she is giving some of her year 2 children Bond 9-10 maths papers to do, which ALARMED me, on a number of levels
! ie, Was this the standard I was supposed to aspire to for my DS; what were these DC doing in their spare time?!!
I would say no, and that Y2 children have better things to so, although some people seem to like to put fear into others....
Any personal experiences would be very helpful. My DS is an able boy but I don't want to put too much pressure on too early. However, it seems this whole area (Sutton and Kingston) seems particularly hot-housey!
You are right in this regard but be aware that when asking for personal experiences all of us are battle scarred (or not) by our own experiences. It has been mentioned before on this site that the definition of too much prep is 'any more than I did' from a parent whose DC have qualified for their school of choice. The definition of too little being 'what I did' from those whose have not qualified. Do bear in mind that somewhere it has to be the child's abilities and a bit of luck on the day that count as well, so whatever you do, do not make this the be all and end all of anything in Y6, let alone in Y3.