How the other half live
Moderators: Section Moderators, Forum Moderators
-
Chelmsford mum
- Posts: 2113
- Joined: Sat Feb 21, 2009 7:16 pm
O.K Tipsy, I have watched it now and have voted.I voted "yes" - shock horror. 
The reason I did was because you asked should"these" children have gone to boarding school.
Given their current circumstances : a mother who whilst clearly loving them was not herself able to reinforce their education, a truly sink estate where they would have a high risk of being drawn into criminality,grinding poverty that was not likely to aleviate very soon and their own willingness to adapt, given all this they chose a very imperfect, but better route for them.
I say imperfect because it pained me to see how often the eldest girl cried e.g when asked about her home "I don't know what world I want to live in" and in the car going home to visit her mother.I am not saying she was unhappy all the time, far from it but whenever thoughts of home came to her mind, from her own comments, it was more then homesickness making her cry.She felt incredibly torn.
I am afraid that this will only get harder for her as she gets older and more aware of the extreme gulf between the two worlds that she inhabits.I am not entirely sure that , as she gets older, all the teenage friends she has, will be quite as kind and sensitive to her situation as those at prep school.It was a very exposing documentary and all her teenage peers will be well aquainted with all her circumstances.
However a choice between this and sitting looking out on crimes happening a few feet away, too terrified to go out , well of course this is nothing short of imprisonment.At school she has space, is in safety and of course is receiving a first class education, which will hopefully one day mean generations of that family will be lifted from poverty.
Many families have to live this way which makes us all want to keep working towards changing this for many, not just the few bright enough/lucky enough to get bursaries.I regard this as emergency surgery that was a real "life saver" for them but we should keep working for a cure.Idealistic as this may be, we have to keep trying and failures of all Govts to do so should spur us on, not make us cynical.
Really enjoyed watching it though.
The reason I did was because you asked should"these" children have gone to boarding school.
Given their current circumstances : a mother who whilst clearly loving them was not herself able to reinforce their education, a truly sink estate where they would have a high risk of being drawn into criminality,grinding poverty that was not likely to aleviate very soon and their own willingness to adapt, given all this they chose a very imperfect, but better route for them.
I say imperfect because it pained me to see how often the eldest girl cried e.g when asked about her home "I don't know what world I want to live in" and in the car going home to visit her mother.I am not saying she was unhappy all the time, far from it but whenever thoughts of home came to her mind, from her own comments, it was more then homesickness making her cry.She felt incredibly torn.
I am afraid that this will only get harder for her as she gets older and more aware of the extreme gulf between the two worlds that she inhabits.I am not entirely sure that , as she gets older, all the teenage friends she has, will be quite as kind and sensitive to her situation as those at prep school.It was a very exposing documentary and all her teenage peers will be well aquainted with all her circumstances.
However a choice between this and sitting looking out on crimes happening a few feet away, too terrified to go out , well of course this is nothing short of imprisonment.At school she has space, is in safety and of course is receiving a first class education, which will hopefully one day mean generations of that family will be lifted from poverty.
Many families have to live this way which makes us all want to keep working towards changing this for many, not just the few bright enough/lucky enough to get bursaries.I regard this as emergency surgery that was a real "life saver" for them but we should keep working for a cure.Idealistic as this may be, we have to keep trying and failures of all Govts to do so should spur us on, not make us cynical.
Really enjoyed watching it though.
How the other half live
HI Bromley Mum.
I voted yes in this poll. We are now regular watchers of this series - and some of the featured families are in very similar circumstances to ourselves now (If you want to see my previous post on the Wirral forum - be my guest - it may reiterate how I personally reached this decision).
The mother had no choice but to agree to let her daughters make use of this opportunity. To deny them would impact on the both the girls and their own children’s futures – probably for the worse (although no one can ever guarantee a happy ending).
Personally, I (and DH) hold the view that we have to take responsibility for our DC’s, not ownership. I would hate for my children to ever feel they could not move forward with their lives because of either one of us.
Many years ago now, DH and I looked into emigrating – but couldn’t bring ourselves to leave our families (mainly the grandparents) and friends. Had we known then what our future was to be – I believe our choice may have been very different – because of the children and what it just might have given them? Bearing in mind that if it wasn’t working out for the better we would have [technically] lost nothing by returning to “startâ€
I voted yes in this poll. We are now regular watchers of this series - and some of the featured families are in very similar circumstances to ourselves now (If you want to see my previous post on the Wirral forum - be my guest - it may reiterate how I personally reached this decision).
The mother had no choice but to agree to let her daughters make use of this opportunity. To deny them would impact on the both the girls and their own children’s futures – probably for the worse (although no one can ever guarantee a happy ending).
Personally, I (and DH) hold the view that we have to take responsibility for our DC’s, not ownership. I would hate for my children to ever feel they could not move forward with their lives because of either one of us.
Many years ago now, DH and I looked into emigrating – but couldn’t bring ourselves to leave our families (mainly the grandparents) and friends. Had we known then what our future was to be – I believe our choice may have been very different – because of the children and what it just might have given them? Bearing in mind that if it wasn’t working out for the better we would have [technically] lost nothing by returning to “startâ€
Thanks you for bringing this and discussing it, out of sheer curiosity I watched it online.
My eyes are red and I am in tears, It was very personal and moving for me so much of that family rings true for my family too. She is from the country where I come from, she is Sharon and I am Sharon, she loves sewing and I love sewing too. It was like watching my own reflection and what I am trying to achieve for my kids.
I personally believe education is empowerment and is the only way to a life change and I am so pleased that these two girls got that and I have no doubt, their lives have changed for good.
The wealthy family who helped them are truely awesome and their little girl really took it in her stride and she took it so well to understand the poor. As for the school that helped them well I can only say how truely wonderful it is to change the life of a family like that. I hope Sharon will succeed in getting a career and hopefully they would one day move to somewhere a little better. She was selfless and let what was the best for her children not just have them around at home without much hope for a future.
As for boarding well I am sure most people would now undestand why I think Boarding is the best thing since sliced bread.
My eyes are red and I am in tears, It was very personal and moving for me so much of that family rings true for my family too. She is from the country where I come from, she is Sharon and I am Sharon, she loves sewing and I love sewing too. It was like watching my own reflection and what I am trying to achieve for my kids.
I personally believe education is empowerment and is the only way to a life change and I am so pleased that these two girls got that and I have no doubt, their lives have changed for good.
The wealthy family who helped them are truely awesome and their little girl really took it in her stride and she took it so well to understand the poor. As for the school that helped them well I can only say how truely wonderful it is to change the life of a family like that. I hope Sharon will succeed in getting a career and hopefully they would one day move to somewhere a little better. She was selfless and let what was the best for her children not just have them around at home without much hope for a future.
As for boarding well I am sure most people would now undestand why I think Boarding is the best thing since sliced bread.
Impossible is Nothing.
-
Chelmsford mum
- Posts: 2113
- Joined: Sat Feb 21, 2009 7:16 pm
How lovely to see something that resonated so strongly.I would also recommend the earler episode I referred to but keep the tissues near.sherry_d wrote:, It was very personal and moving for me so much of that family rings true for my family too. She is from the country where I come from, she is Sharon and I am Sharon, she loves sewing and I love sewing too. It was like watching my own reflection and what I am trying to achieve for my kids.
It really did CM, sadly my little girl isnt here, I will show it to her later just to tell her that life can really change with a bit of hard work. I am going to watch the previous one with a box of tissue handy this timeChelmsford mum wrote:How lovely to see something that resonated so strongly.
Impossible is Nothing.
Sherry d,
I am certain that with your level of vision,determination and faith in your children, you will achieve all you desire and more
It was a very moving programme and I was struck by the depth of the relationship between the two families - it was really a manifestation of 'humanity' at it's very best. The other episode was also very touching and equally inspirational.
The concept of sponsoring a family living in poverty in Britain is very powerful and so worthwhile (despite anecdotal 'evidence' to the contrary in the media which would have us believe the poor are all 'living it up on benefits) Slightly off topic, but I don't think many of us(including myself)have any idea really of the scale of poverty and despair that actually exists. For example, during the 'run up' to Christmas, it came to light that one family of three children in our school did not even have a cooker in their home , let alone a Christmas tree. The children were gaunt and undernourished looking, but sadly this did not make them stand out as so many of the kids in our school look the same. Their plight only came to our attention due to an impromptu visit to their home due to the persistent absentism of one of the children.
Staff were told of the Christmas that one family faced (without identifying the family) and a collection was set up in the school - £1,200 was raised over the course of 2 weeks! A new fridge, cooker, hamper and beds were delivered to the home . The children and mother were all in tears.(as were staff when told in briefing)
Everyone at the school agreed we should in future target fundraising towards helping our own - the direct impact was so powerful .
Linking back to the programme, the kindness shown by these wealthier families is truly humbling and exemplifies the higher human spirit which we should all try to access at some stage in our lives and it is so good for the soul as well as society.
Sorry to go on but I really did find this programme very moving and inspirational.
I am certain that with your level of vision,determination and faith in your children, you will achieve all you desire and more
It was a very moving programme and I was struck by the depth of the relationship between the two families - it was really a manifestation of 'humanity' at it's very best. The other episode was also very touching and equally inspirational.
The concept of sponsoring a family living in poverty in Britain is very powerful and so worthwhile (despite anecdotal 'evidence' to the contrary in the media which would have us believe the poor are all 'living it up on benefits) Slightly off topic, but I don't think many of us(including myself)have any idea really of the scale of poverty and despair that actually exists. For example, during the 'run up' to Christmas, it came to light that one family of three children in our school did not even have a cooker in their home , let alone a Christmas tree. The children were gaunt and undernourished looking, but sadly this did not make them stand out as so many of the kids in our school look the same. Their plight only came to our attention due to an impromptu visit to their home due to the persistent absentism of one of the children.
Staff were told of the Christmas that one family faced (without identifying the family) and a collection was set up in the school - £1,200 was raised over the course of 2 weeks! A new fridge, cooker, hamper and beds were delivered to the home . The children and mother were all in tears.(as were staff when told in briefing)
Everyone at the school agreed we should in future target fundraising towards helping our own - the direct impact was so powerful .
Linking back to the programme, the kindness shown by these wealthier families is truly humbling and exemplifies the higher human spirit which we should all try to access at some stage in our lives and it is so good for the soul as well as society.
Sorry to go on but I really did find this programme very moving and inspirational.
-
bromley mum
- Posts: 1061
- Joined: Tue Oct 20, 2009 5:04 pm
-
Sassie'sDad
- Posts: 459
- Joined: Tue Jan 22, 2008 3:36 pm
- Location: Rugby
I am so glad I read this OP and thus was prompted to watch the programme on 4oD. In fact I had recorded this but deleted the recording without watching, partly because of 'needing the space' and partly because I had not liked a previous programme - the Abingdons and the part qualified barrister.
The first thing that struck me about the mother was how every day must be a struggle by virtue of her extraordinary size. She was clearly appreciative of the huge opportunity Windlesham offered her daughters and it must have been very difficult to 'let them go' even with a younger child still at home. I thought this was a really worthy example of modern philanthropy. Indeed the closeness of the relations between the two families were what made it so special! It is such a shame that we cannot fast forward to see how they will fare at Brighton College - surely only when they have left school behind will it be possible to be sure that escaping the West London environment during their childhood was the right thing! I was surprised how clear the poll results are!
The first thing that struck me about the mother was how every day must be a struggle by virtue of her extraordinary size. She was clearly appreciative of the huge opportunity Windlesham offered her daughters and it must have been very difficult to 'let them go' even with a younger child still at home. I thought this was a really worthy example of modern philanthropy. Indeed the closeness of the relations between the two families were what made it so special! It is such a shame that we cannot fast forward to see how they will fare at Brighton College - surely only when they have left school behind will it be possible to be sure that escaping the West London environment during their childhood was the right thing! I was surprised how clear the poll results are!
-
Chelmsford mum
- Posts: 2113
- Joined: Sat Feb 21, 2009 7:16 pm
I too wasnt moved. Too much moaning from the woman and that house was filthy and she could have done more to make her sorroundings much better.
She expected eveything done for her and how many kids did she have again? 5 and she goes on to say how much she has always wanted kids. I was gasping in horror wanting to shout then look after them. I know 2 bed for that family is small but I have seen worse with people looking after their sorrounding to make it homely for the kids. Was she grateful? NO because she thinks the world owes her somehow.
I really felt for the poor boy, its the son that moved me and did you see he didnt even have shoes, just plimsoles which were torn and I wish him all the best. Its heartbreaking to know there are many kids like him with no hope in life and I really hope he continues with that mechanical training.
And that Estate, oh my world, some people surely live heaven on earth. What I liked about the rich family was that girl was very humble and down to earth and you would never guess she lives in that much wealth. Also what is it with wealthy people, I have noticed the kids say we dont live in Mansions and they say something like its just a large house?
She expected eveything done for her and how many kids did she have again? 5 and she goes on to say how much she has always wanted kids. I was gasping in horror wanting to shout then look after them. I know 2 bed for that family is small but I have seen worse with people looking after their sorrounding to make it homely for the kids. Was she grateful? NO because she thinks the world owes her somehow.
I really felt for the poor boy, its the son that moved me and did you see he didnt even have shoes, just plimsoles which were torn and I wish him all the best. Its heartbreaking to know there are many kids like him with no hope in life and I really hope he continues with that mechanical training.
And that Estate, oh my world, some people surely live heaven on earth. What I liked about the rich family was that girl was very humble and down to earth and you would never guess she lives in that much wealth. Also what is it with wealthy people, I have noticed the kids say we dont live in Mansions and they say something like its just a large house?
Impossible is Nothing.
