independent or grammar which to choose

[new2me]

I too have struggled with grammar versus indie. We could have made the sacrifices to send DS1 to an indie, but I always had the worry about what would happen if our financial position changed for the worst. Another factor for me is that DS1 is very bright, not at all sporty, and although quite interested in music, he's not a joiner. He regards his spare time as his own and refuses to join clubs and activities in his lunchtimes. For DS1 I felt that he would do just as well at the partially selective school as he would at indie. For DS3, currently in year 4, I will have a tough call to make. He's just as bright as his brother but he throws himself heart and soul into everything, rugby, music, whatever. He's the type that would join every club going and make the most of every opportunity available to him. I know state schools also have clubs, but it's harder to join. For example, at DS1's school, the boys choir isn't cool, neither are the science clubs. There are football clubs and netball clubs etc, but only A and B teams, with no space for the average but keen. Indies would have C, D and E teams if there is enough interest! So if you can afford it, and have a child that will make the most of the opportunities, go for the indie.

[BusyQueenBee]

What if the choice is between an indie that is offering you a 100% bursary and a grammar that is one of the top in the country? Would you choose indie without a doubt? Would you consider the grammar for the social mix?

[hermanmunster]

What if the choice is between an indie that is offering you a 100% bursary and a grammar that is one of the top in the country? Would you choose indie without a doubt? Would you consider the grammar for the social mix?

Bursaries are usually reassessed every year so the amount available may vary over time. Not sure that there would be that much difference in the social mix between most indies and most GS... in many areas the GS is the school of choice of all - regardless of income.

[tiffinboys]

During last few months, we have visited several grammars and independent schools and spoke to many parents of children in these schools as well. DC sat for just 2 indies and did well, so far ( meaning no rejections as yet, ).

Indies offer 2 opportunites that grammars don't.
1. Subject choice is bit varied and you could dare to be different.
2. Social exclusivity, (I am not saying it's good or bad). You pay to be a part of an exclusive club. It's here that you may meet future Camerons or Osbornes or Samanthas or Kates. The buildings/libraries/atmosphere of some of the older schools are facinating and psychologically, children start to feel being different and superior to others (again not saying this is good trait or bad). Picture Collet, St. Paul's, King's, Whitgift, Merchant Taylor and you know what I mean.

One caution: IMHO, if you don't have enough resources to participate 'life to the full', don't go to the indies on bursaries or some other support. Your darling child may be psychologicall effected, by the dominance of very wealthy children, unless of course the child has very strong mind and is cabable to keeping his/her balance.

[menagerie]

tiffinboys, I'm sure you're right in some respects about needing the money to pay for extras in order to fit in. But I know several very ordinary families who go to our local top indie. Small houses, camping holidays, parents in modest-paying middle class jobs (e.g. clergy.) Never had any sense that they are missing out on life at their schools. It depends on the school.

Some schools make a point of social elitism (again, not saying it's good or bad.) You know what you are buying into if you sit your DC for Eton, and it's not just the academic or extra-curricular activities, it's the connections. But not all parents aiming for indies are looking for that. Some schools offer that without the academic kudos, others offer academics without the social connections.

[MAZER66]

Most parents that opt for top Indies are usually very ambitious for their DC, and are, more often than not, very successful themselves (obviously, quite wealthy also).
I know of a number of such parents who, at 6th form, are now transferring to state maintained schools to increase their off-springs chances of getting places at the top Oxbridge/Red Brick uni's. No doubt university admision tutors/Dons will be carefully looking at parents post-codes to cut out this type of manipulation!
I just think parents need to be mindful of the pressure top institutions are under to open up access to the more disadvantaged groups in our society and invariably be at the expense of privately educated children.

[twelveminus]

What if the choice is between an indie that is offering you a 100% bursary and a grammar that is one of the top in the country? Would you choose indie without a doubt? Would you consider the grammar for the social mix?

Bursaries are usually reassessed every year so the amount available may vary over time. Not sure that there would be that much difference in the social mix between most indies and most GS... in many areas the GS is the school of choice of all - regardless of income.

Which areas would those be?

[Yummiemummie]

Hermanmumster wrote,
[quote][/quote]Bursaries are usually reassessed every year so the amount available may vary over time. Not sure that there would be that much difference in the social mix between most indies and most GS... in many areas the GS is the school of choice of all - regardless of income.

The bursary money is usually for the duration of the school careers. Honestly as if they would expect people to take places on that basis.
And hermanmunster every time this debate comes up you post the same old thing. Regardless of income .......GS is choice of all.....where is this? We are not talking second tier indes here. On this forum posters are often referring to the top tier I indes. It's funny before your post I was just thinking how careful everyone was being with their wording as this topic has frequently lead to some quite unhelpful posting in the past.

[Kingfisher]

Bursaries ARE assessed every year, including at at the top indies. Scholarships last for the duration but these are not the same thing and there are far fewer scholarships awarded.

Documentation has to be provided and actually, the questions are extremely intrusive - bank statements and saving account statements over several months, mortgage or rent payments, evidence of salary over several months, P60 and everything else financial. It is done every April at my DD's school. Better get ready!

[Yummiemummie]

Yes they are reassessed, but they will only change if the recipients financial circumstances change so thats fine. The bursary is unlikely to be withdrawn for any other reason. Schools have the full seven years money available if needed.