Living with Bursary

Independent Schools as an alternative to Grammar

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ToadMum
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Location: Essex

Re: Living with Busary

Post by ToadMum »

Amber wrote:If you have a good state alternative why on earth would you pay?

Small classes confer no academic advantage whatsoever to children without specific learning needs - studies have consistently demonstrated this. There may be a pastoral advantage for some children who are very sensitive. Equally some sensitive children do better when there is a bigger pool of potential friends to choose from.

Facilities? Presumably most of them (pool? tennis courts?) are available elsewhere at a much lower cost, and you can choose which ones to access as well.

Networking for making contacts? You have lost me there I am afraid. If that is what you are hoping for from an education then yes, push for it - try Eton maybe.

Inheritance? Ditto. Are you planning to bump off some rich relatives during the course of your child's schooling? Maybe wait until afterwards. :wink:

Amber, your post (apart from the bumping off relatives bit :lol: ) mainly reiterates concisely what most of the rest of us have already said, so I'm guessing that it also neatly encapsulates what Mike refers to as the 'lot of rubbish being talked on this thread'...

Personally, I'm not sure that it is particularly important which schools the OP is referring to - unless the state grammar happens to be St Olaves? In which case, going on what one is hearing about the school at the moment, even I might be tempted to suggest risking poverty to go for the independent.
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sleeplessinhalstead
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Re: Living with Busary

Post by sleeplessinhalstead »

If you have a grammar school place I would save your money go with that. It is nice to be offered a bursary or scholarship and shows the school considers your child would be an asset to them, but the grammar school is free. There are extra costs with any school, trips you might wish to go on, pressure from friends to go on the trips etc.

As others have said there will be an annual review of your finances and the bursary can be adjusted downwards if your income increases. I would also consider any younger siblings. If you have younger children to consider, then take the grammar school place and save the money in case you need it for them. I would ignore things like facilities, class size. The curriculum might influence me, but since your other option is a grammar school I'm sure it will be similar.

I have one at grammar and one at an indie plus a younger at state primary. Grammar is 1st choice for me, facilities are great at the indie, but dd is not interested in sport or drama. I never see any of the parents either, kids are dropped off at the school bus by car and I go to 1 parent's evening a year and the occasional concert and prize day. You are unlikely to get to know many parents at any senior school.
Stroller
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Re: Living with Busary

Post by Stroller »

sleeplessinhalstead wrote:You are unlikely to get to know many parents at any senior school.
Just on this point, I have been pleasantly surprised by the number of parents we've met at Tiffin Girls' School. Sharing contact info with the class and year group has been very successful. We meet at parent-organised class-specific events, PSA family events, school-run evenings, numerous concerts, etc. By the parents' evening we knew dozens of parents by name (and not just those from our class). I guess some choose not to get involved, but many do and I'm grateful to them for the great sense of community. We've done drop offs and pick ups at each other's homes and had various chats around kitchen tables as part of that. We can and do contact each other about all sorts of things. I didn't think it would be like this, but we all shape what we experience by our own participation.
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Amber
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Re: Living with Bursary

Post by Amber »

Stroller wrote:
sleeplessinhalstead wrote:You are unlikely to get to know many parents at any senior school.
Just on this point, I have been pleasantly surprised by the number of parents we've met at Tiffin Girls' School. Sharing contact info with the class and year group has been very successful. We meet at parent-organised class-specific events, PSA family events, school-run evenings, numerous concerts, etc.
For those of us for whom the words "PSA family event", "school quiz night (fancy dress)" or "Mums' night out" strike dread into the very core of our souls and bring us out in a clammy sweat, this may not be the disadvantage it is portrayed to be.
PettswoodFiona
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Location: Petts Wood, Bromley, Kent

Re: Living with Bursary

Post by PettswoodFiona »

We struggled with prep school fees and are hugely relieved we will be stopping them to take up a place at a grammar. We had one holiday every other year. Our house has not exactly fallen around our ears but we have only spent on bare essentials. Our bathroom is from the dark ages, our sofa falling apart, the floor on the living room has lifted and desperately needs replacing, computer is so slow you can make a cup of tea while it boots up etc etc. 7 years of minimal maintenance has caught up with us and it will probably take us two years, spending the equivalent of school fees each month to get back on track. Yes we were able to put these off and we're happy to do so, just like any other family who has to jiggle budgets regardless of whether an indie school is in order. Grandma paid for the school uniform but we were conscious that wasn't an easy thing for her to do. We are looking forward to treating her now rather than the other way round. Also think about extra curricular, we are enjoying seeing DD have music lessons etc that we previously couldn't afford which is another thing to consider.

We were also a bit jaded about the whole private school thing. DD's indie just got an excellent ISI report but I don't recognise the school when I read that report. The grammar school also has 27 or 28 per class, not much difference from the indie which has 24, not that I was really worried about class sizes as others have already mentioned.

It is ultimately a very personal and only you can decide.
Guest55
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Joined: Mon Feb 12, 2007 2:21 pm

Re: Living with Bursary

Post by Guest55 »

ISIS reports are not independent - Private schools are inspected by staff at other Private schools.

My friend, who is a Head at her second Private school, says these inspections are very 'weak' compared to Ofsted.
Yamin151
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Re: Living with Bursary

Post by Yamin151 »

The trouble with threads liege this is that they are so divisive. Everyone has a view and a strong one at that.
Mine is just another view. I'd say too that if there is a GS or good state school alternative, and it is a good match for your child, then go for that. As others have said, facilities and froth are not really relevant.
As Amber mentioned, class sizes not necessarily better, although anecdotally I do feel that if a child slips behind it is easier to spot that in a smaller class. But there is no proof. I do also feel as she also mentioned, that for certain children with pastoral issues, small class sizes can make a HUGE difference.
But it's simply which school feels the best fit for you and your child. But if the money worry is keeping you awake now, it certainly will when you're committed, so I'd be thinking it, tbh.
Yamin151
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Re: Living with Bursary

Post by Yamin151 »

Guest55 wrote:ISIS reports are not independent - Private schools are inspected by staff at other Private schools.

My friend, who is a Head at her second Private school, says these inspections are very 'weak' compared to Ofsted.

Our private school also has an ofsted report.
Just like all state schools are not hot houses of violence full of unmotivated kids and world weary teachers, neither are indie schools all hot houses of over privileged, under achieving students with parents pulled in by smart facilities but with no academic success to offer, skidaddling along on reports made up by useless bodies with no teeth and full of unqualified teachers. As some would have you believe...... :roll:
ToadMum
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Re: Living with Bursary

Post by ToadMum »

Very valid point, Yamin, regarding choosing a school which is the best fit for the child concerned. I rather assumed, though, that by this stage in the proceedings - ?first term's fees already paid at the indie (unless this is a very late offer) and if a state place is to be given up, it should be as soon as possible so that the waiting list recipient can attend his induction day etc - surely the two schools in question would fit that criterion already? Otherwise the dilemma would be rather less, or even non-existent, one would suppose.

Would you really pauper yourself to send your child to a fee-paying school which you didn't think would suit him, just for the 'name'? We certainly wouldn't.
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Moon unit
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Re: Living with Bursary

Post by Moon unit »

In my opinion it's very important for family happiness that parents aren't stressed. If by taking this place it will cause you worry and bring tension into family life I don't think it's worth it.
Just to turn the question on its head what would be detrimental to your child about attending the grammar option?
Private facilities can be amazing but I wouldn't be swayed by them. Overall family contentment matters more than anything. Parents under strain having an impact on children's general well being.
I didn't know private schools had Ofsted inspections.How does that dovetail into the ISIS inspections?
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