Voicing all the thoughts that were/stillare going around in my head!!
Speaking for myself only when I say that whilst 1st child was off to grammar school,the doubts(unknown to child) were still there that we have picked the right environment for him.
our children are under enormous pressure from all directions.
How very true...to conform to socially acceptable standards,expectations from parents,people you know in the community,family...will they feel
comfortable,grow and learn without feeling that they have 'failed' if not in the top of the top?
we watch him daily to make sure he is thriving. He could have thrived in other schools but each have their own set of concerns. Having made the choice to go to a selective and getting there does not mean his future is written out. In fact, the pace of change is so fast that as parents, we sometimes feel left behind and struggle to keep everything balanced and all sane and happy.
In effect, wherever he went..in the last 3 years,we would be doing the same things to keep that transition from Junior school to senior to beyond
as smooth as possible.
We are very aware that at any point in time,our child may lose his way but that can happen whichever school he goes to. Our thoughts,as parents, were always that if at any point he was unhappy or there was a problem..we'd just have to find a solution..even if he has to change schools. He didn't know of that option and luckily has settled in well at selective school.
Don't feel apologetic for your thoughts ..as we ourselves have gone through school/college/uni , we feel they are under more pressure than us when we were young. A lot of hidden worry for the kids in our modern world!