We now have a real dilemma.

Up until now, our first choice has been Ashlawn, we didn't feel LSS would suit our son very much

However he did really well and would definitely qualify for a place at either which is making us think again. We feel we have have talked LSS down so as not to put too much pressure on him.

Clearly it's a great school. My concerns are
- all boys. I went to a single sex school and I worry this doesn't really prepare you for university/workplace
- pastoral care. I have heard there are issues here.
- learning style. My son is a talker - he is often in trouble in class. I worry here it is a little more head down and get On with it.
- individuality. He is a loud, boisterous, adrenaline fuelled boy and I don't want this to be crushed out of him.

My concerns around Ashlawn
- it's so big! And he might not get the individual attention even in the grammar school.
- they might not push them quite as much to get the best grades (although this might be a good thing)

We're going to try to look at them again.

Any advice or experience would be much appreciated.

I would like to know the source of that allegation that there are pastoral issues at LSS. My son goes to LSS, and I have no issue with the pastoral care. If there is evidence to the contrary I would like to hear that evidence.

But you are correct, talk to the schools. That is the only way you will resolve your questions.

Hi, I've heard that LSS has a bullying problem? Correct me if I'm wrong - I would look around Ashlawn on 20th October when the open evening is. Both of my children passed for LSS, however I chose Ashlawn because of the unique learning environment and culture and the standards of teaching and individual support every student gets. They have a 'Challenge 4 All' programme which chooses the top 100 students in the year (in terms of academia) and these students get extra support in order to gain A*A grades. I'm not sure on LSS's system but my eldest child last year got 10 A*s and 3 As from Ashlawn, hoping the same for the younger one!

Thanks Ryan.

Instinctively, Ashlawn feels right for him but, having grown up in Rugby, it seems madness to turn down a Sheriff place.

I don't have actual examples of lack of pastoral care, more that results take priority. 'Great school if you can handle the bullying' seems to be the tone of parents that I know. They say this in a positive, character building way.

I can confirm that my son attends LSS and he isn't aware of a bullying problem. I have the parents of LSS boys in my social circle and not one of them has ever mentioned bullying. I am not saying that it doesn't exist. I would be naive to assume no school at some stage has a bullying issue, but I can confirm that this has never been an issue or a concern for me or any other LSS parent that I know.

However if there is any specific evidence that contradicts that I would like to hear that!

My son also goes to LSS and I have not heard of particular bullying issues either. I know children at Ashlawn and Children at LSS and in terms of "bullying" similar stories come out of both schools, nothing that I would class as bullying, boys will push each other around a bit and they do that at Ashlawn as well as LSS, but I wouldn't say that either had a bullying problem. I have been very impressed with the pastoral care at LSS, the school is very approachable and home to school communication is excellent. Also the idea that they only focus on results is not true, as the head teacher said in his speech, if the boys leave school with 10A* and nothing else then we as a school haven't done our job.

I keep writing posts and they keep disappearing!

Can I ask what your sons are like?

Do they thrive on competition or do they need encouragement/building up
Do they do homework willingly or is it a struggle
Do they have a big circle of friends?
Do they play sports?
What interaction do they have with girls?

To put it in context.

My son came 51st. He is bright and sparkybbut likes to question everything and pushes lots of boundaries.

He needs to be interested in something or he's not bothered. His school reports are all 'capable but could produce more work'. He's often in trouble for talking in class or being distracted/distracting.

His people skills are great, he's always worked well in a group, manages people very well and easily 50% if not more of his friends are girls.

He is utterly charming and exasperating in equal measure.

Our dilemma is whether LSS is actually exactly the school he needs to challenge him, or would squash all the bits that make him great.

Some of these questions are quite personal, and although I hide under a pseudonym some people on this forum know me, so I am going to be guarded in my response.

Do they thrive on competition or do they need encouragement/building up? Neither.
Do they do homework willingly or is it a struggle? Willingly.
Do they have a big circle of friends? I am not concerned that my DS does not have enough friends.
Do they play sports? Yes, mostly outside LSS.
What interaction do they have with girls? My DS has a social life outside of LSS.

Sorry I didn't mean to ask personal questions and I hope you don't think I was framing them negatively.

My other son in very different and I totally see him thriving at Sheriff if he goes in 2018. His personality and attitude are very different.

I just find the eldest one a bit more of a challenge to know what will be best for him vs what he would prefer.