I am the mum of three girls
One is coming up for 14, one going to year 7 in Sept and one in infants.I love having all girls... yes really!
That said I have encountered some of the behaviour mentioned.
As regards ganging up into future secondary school groups, I would be inclined to have a quiet word with an appropriate teacher.Not to get anyone "told off" but that the school could help with this.Middle DD's school (ordinary little state primary) has been very good at this kind of thing.They will pull a whole group of kids out of class.(who have been involved in dramatic arguments)Then they genuinely talk it through.They get them to write each other's good points , to talk about how they could have handled situations differently etc etc.It really does resolve things.
I know not all schools are like this but they need to know that the impending school destinations are causing divisions.They could talk about it in class and monitor it.
As regards girly rowing in Primary school
, it helps when it is at its worst for your daughter to go off and do something else entirely.DD1 used to sit under a tree with a book and when asked why used to say "I'm fed up with all the rowing and I am not getting involved".Nearly always another couple of girls would join and start making daisy chains , chatting etc The other girls soon realised she couldn't be drawn in.
DD2 goes and plays football with the boys when it all gets too much.
Again a word with the teacher can help, as she can talk to the girls as a whole, if it is escalating too much.
Secondary school is harder because my daughter would be rightly cross
if I went in to the teacher for anything other than something serious.
I have found that encouraging as wide a group of friends as poss helps.I hate sleepovers but we host a lot of them and when I sense some tension with her close inner circle, I ask a couple of girls round from outside that circle.That said I have had to deal with sobbing daughter along the lines of "Jane has ditched me" etc.It can be heartbreaking but keep on trying to keep the friendship net wide. I also find what seems like the "end of the world" for them soon becomes history.As someone said time works wonders.
It can't always be done but an alternate social scene helps too.My eldest has friends at church and my middle one through dancing.Sometimes it is worth encouraging these to give them a break from school friendship politics.
My worst period was with the eldest when we had to move in year six.There were four girls in two "couples" and no others.To cap it all a group of boys physically bullied her.
The reason I mention it is that this girl, who used to come out of that school looking like she was carrying the world on her shoulders ,is now a happy girl with genuine friends.
Secondary school is a clean slate.It may take them a while to find their real friends. Hence sobbing daughter in year 7 is now ,nearly two years on, and with her truly compatible friends.I know there will be other blips but if she has a wide group of friends ,she will get through the girly dramas.
Lastly, in defence of girls , it is their nature to want to form strong relationships and that's what makes this stage difficult. They want their friendships to be deep rooted.They don't want conversation on the level of " Did you see the game last night?" This trait of girls has its obvious and evident down sides ,but they are practising for later life when their female friendships and other relationships will be deeply important to them. They are "in the deep end " of relationships ,and all the struggles that brings ,much earlier in life than (most) boys.
I think girls are at these ages, from this mum's point of view, overly dramatic ,pouty and moody but also sensitive in a good way, empathetic, sympathetic ,thoughtful, affectionate, passionate about their beliefs and excellent company.