Sleepovers - overrated??

[Chelmsford mum]

My DD, since whenever she started having/going to sleepovers was the one who fell asleep first and therefore was the one who had her face drawn on, was photographed with knickers on her head etc etc. As a result she is usually quite cheery afterwards but doesn't like them much!

I think I might change my mind about sleepovers now......

[Rugbymum]

I got so fed up of dealing with grumpy kids and OH while feeling knackered that I've banned sleepovers.

Ever since then, my children's friends' parents have said the same thing and now we all ask that children are collected at 10pm after birthday parties etc which works really well as they get to stay up but still go to sleep on the right side of midnight.

[Chelmsford mum]

But seriously despite Just1-2go's experience , we have not really had any issues with sleepovers so will continue with them.As I said before as they get older these events get much, much tamer and quieter.

[zvrk]

My experience with sleepovers has been positive (so far ), we sometimes have up to 4 boys ,maybe every three months (my DS(8 years old) is an only child and this is my way of giving him a feel of getting up to a busy house).
We follow certain routine ,but they are in bed(big air beds in our living room) by 7.30 when we put a film on (chossen before,and age appropriate)+ pop corn. The film is usually finished by 9, when the light goes out and they can still be heard chatting. But not for long .

[zorro]

8 is very young for sleepovers I think, we didn't have any until Y6.DS is now in Y8.
I think from the previous posts ,girls are better controlled than boys! My DS's guests and him - are still going strong at 4am!
We also have the scenario where children come from a wide area but do tend to stick to school holidays. As DS is at an independent , there are plenty of those!
Single guests would be fine but my DS always has at least 2, usually 3 staying over- I think that is the fun bit!

[zvrk]

8 is very young for sleepovers I think, we didn't have any until Y6.DS is now in Y8.
I think from the previous posts ,girls are better controlled than boys! My DS's guests and him - are still going strong at 4am!
We also have the scenario where children come from a wide area but do tend to stick to school holidays. As DS is at an independent , there are plenty of those!
Single guests would be fine but my DS always has at least 2, usually 3 staying over- I think that is the fun bit!

Age when to start with sleepovers really depends on a child, we have started doing it two years ago (he was 6 then) , we do it only during the holiday, never had any problems, had boys run around the garden/our woods, and they are very much ready to calm down and go to bed.

[asdguest]

I try to encourage them as they get older - at least you know where your child is, who they are with, and what they are up to!

[sherry_d]

Now I feel a bit sad my 10 year old DD has never done a sleepover as she has never been invited to one She hasnt invited anyone either so I guess its fair play

But from the looks of it here it seems some love them and some looth them, it will be great to exprience it one day though. I guess at the moment its not going to happen soon as I would rather have the other child comes and sleep over at ours than for her to go away which I know sounds very selfish. No wonder she hasnt been invited to one.

Anyone feels a little overproctective sometimes? I do see some of DD's friends playing outside on their own with their friends on their bikes. I do see some on their own in the playground of our local park which really isnt in a busy road. That just horrifies me and I cant keep DD out of sight and I feel I should give her a bit more freedom maybe. Its like walking to school, we live miles from it now so really we cant walk but even if we lived near the school the thought of letting her leave the house alone horrifies me. Now she will be in secondary school soon and I have to surely let go. I kind of feel everything will be OK in secondary and can give her that bit of freedom then....argrrr the joys of parenting

[doodles]

Don't worry Sherry, I am not a big fan of sleepovers either. Some children seem to do them all of the time but my DS's can probably count on one hand the number that they have done between them.

I really know what you mean about letting go. My DS's can't walk to school either and yet in September DS1 is going to travel to TW from Sevenoaks by himself - he has no problem with the idea - it was me. So I have started to let go. We go to town and I tell him to meet me back at the car in 30 minutes and I have also started letting him go to the park by himself with a friend from close by. Do you know what has made this happen? We bought him a mobile phone for his birthday - I know that these are a bone of contention - but it has given me such peace of mind that he can get hold of me and I can get hold of him. He has to cross a difficult road to go to the park so he phones me when he gets there and I can relax and he knows when he has to be home by and if he is going to be late he calls me. He knows it is one late time/ no phone call and it all stops.

I really do know how you feel 'cos my friends laugh at me and are much more relaxed - the state I was in when he went to the post box for the first time by himself is legendary! Now the school trip to France this summer is a completely different story - can you fall overboard from a ferry!!

[KS10]

Anyone feels a little overproctective sometimes? I do see some of DD's friends playing outside on their own with their friends on their bikes.

I think it depends on how old they are and where you live. We are lucky as we live on a close. There are about 20 houses and 6 kids beween the ages of 6 and 8 who always play together. My son who is older practises bowling (don't think our front door will be able to cope for much longer with the battering it takes) while the rest of them cycle or chat or play inside. The neighbours on the whole seem to enjoy seeing them outside and someone will always check that they're not being too much of a nuisance. There was one girl who was rather obnoxious but once the others made it clear that they weren't tolerating it she stopped coming out to 'torment' them (Angelica from the Rugrats).

I do see some on their own in the playground of our local park which really isnt in a busy road. That just horrifies me

I feel the same about our local park. I hate it! TBH, they do so many other activities that they don't really miss the park. We save that for when we visit the grandparents, not the same I know as meeting up with mates without the 'olds'.

As for walking to school, it was a case of biting the bullet and letting go. Didn't want DS to be in a position where the first time he walked anywhere by himself was when he started secondary school. He now walks to school by himself or with a friend. I realised he would never become roadwise with one of us talking him through every step.