I would just dress your dd in an unforgiving coat and march in with the other one announcing " Mini Mystery is having a health day today !"
You are going round in circles and I would just do your own thing.I know it grates having to spend your family time working which they should be doing it at school...but life isn't perfect and they are your dd,so it does all boil down to you really. I find it a bit of a strain working out what to do etc, but then I look at how far my ds1 has come and yes, it was a lot of hard work done at home, but so worth it !
Ds2 has needed lots of work too and as he has improved so has his self esteem...it really makes such a difference doing little and often at home.
If other parents are unhappy, why don't you ask for a meeting where the teachers can explain the phonics/reading system etc and ask for handouts ? You come across as very intelligent,Mystery ( although we'll have to work on your dress sense ) and you are quite capable of doing bits at home...you're a teacher as well? but I feel sorry for those who just send their children in every day putting their trust in the teachers to do their very best for their child.That's all you want.
I'm off out now to buy myself an unforgiving coat.Dd still adamant she's not doing the reading so will have to brace myself for unanswered questions and eye rolling...might do some myself but I was always told not to, incase the wind changed !
Dd spelling book has been kept behind by the teachers? ( I covered this one with The Princess and The Frog paper...maybe it wasn't their thing ?!) I did put in some comments...perhaps they are saving up the evidence to put infront of my DH at the next governors meeting
Anyway must go......ds1 is on a health day today, and we have lots to do ! Will fill you in later !!!!